Dildo (strap-on) advice

[neut5]

What do you recommend as being the proper features of a dildo to use for anal sex on my trans gf? I want to use one that's a strap-on. One that won't hurt, be safe and be pleasurable? And how should I use dildos? This is my first time using a dildo so please bear in mind that in responses. Thank you

[Cynobyte]

Look at glass ones.  I g   ave up all my big toys for this little glass one.  Plus, have you asked her what she likes?  Maybe shes not into dildos;)  good luck!

[erika.s]

100% silicone is my favorite.: )

[Bimmer Guy]

Look at glass ones.  I g   ave up all my big toys for this little glass one.  Plus, have you asked her what she likes?  Maybe shes not into dildos;)  good luck!

My understanding is that it is unsafe to use a glass dildo for strap on sex.  Glass is not forgiving and doesn't bend the way it may need to during strap on sex.  Glass dildos should be hand use only.

OP, I would suggest asking your GF is she has ever had anal sex and what size (or maybe even a specific product) she likes?  Silicone is the best all around for strapping and the most safe.  You can boil to sterilize it.

Hit up Early to bed, vixen creations, blowfish.  Any of the online sex shops should have what you need.  Personally, I like "Vix Skin" from vixen creations dildos.  Their site will have specific measurements, which is nice.

The Joque harness (made by spare part hardware) is quite popular and all around good harness.  You can also get that at the vixen creations site.  Or just google it to compare prices.

[Cynobyte]

omg, im stupid:)  bimmer guy is right, dont use glass w strapon..  their suggestions is better for the strapon use.  thanks bimmer guy for calling that one..  im still blonde under this wig;)

[Laura_7]

You could have a look at rodeoh style harnesses...
you could have a look at strapless strapons... some people use them with panties, or a harness...

use safe silicone, or a condom... some materials are not that safe...

if using a harness, there are devices that also please the wearer... or strapless strapons, there are some with ridges to please the wearer...

concerning anal, you might try not too big ones first...
and there are bent dildos available, so they can reach certain spots better which can be very pleasurable...
one is the p/g-spot, towards the stomach..
which can be very pleasurable anally stimulated both for ftm and mtf people...
and you might try different motions...
deeply pressed... slow pressed...a bit faster... etc

use enough organic lube, and take it slow in the beginning...
you might tell them to relax... there is a muscle in the anus which should be relaxed for better entry...

all at your own risk (use common sense with panties and strapless strapons for example... not too small panties etc)

hugs

[Bimmer Guy]

In thinking about you saying you have never used a dildo before....

The other thing to note about anal sex is you need to take things slow and make sure she is relaxed and ready for you.  Hopefully, she has had this type of sex before and can direct you as to how to approach this/her.  Lots of lube, too!

You might want to talk to others or read about anal sex, rather than just "jumping in" so to speak, especially if it is the first time for both of you.  The anus is less forgiving than the vagina and you don't want to hurt her.  As someone else said, start with something small.  Take your time.  Don't look to porn to tell you how to do this.

[erika.s]

have you tried a company like freetom, emisil or eroticreations? ? they have devices that are like dildos but are way more realistic to enhance the experience: )

[FTMax]

I've always been a fan of letting the lady go on a shopping trip and choose her own. The staff at places that sell toys are usually very open minded and knowledgeable.

[Tessa James]

If your GF has some experience she may also be aware of a consideration for some.  Not to be overly graphic but some of us have done a pre-session enema for a sense of feeling confident reception can go well and maybe feeling a bit more clean.  Strap ons usually have an end rib/flange as some toys can get lost..no one likes to hear "Opps!"  

Have fun

[Lorlor]

Tantus godess is one of my favs for that kind of thing. It's harness compatible and it's firm but still a little soft, very nice. If you're just introducing anal though try starting with an njoy plug or something really small that requires little effort to get in and littlw movement once situated to kind get them started (for realz njoy is nice, has a good weight and shape and whatnot and its only like $40 on amazon with prime shipping). Then move up to the dildos and whatnot.

[Nicodeme]

If you're just starting out you can get okayish silicone dildos for about $20+. It will take some experimenting to find the ideal toy and brands like Tantus can cost up to $100-something. Silicone is easily sterilized (a MUST if you happen to be doing anal) and you can choose your firmness. As others have mentioned you need to find something that is firm enough to hold up to penetration (first one I ever bought was unbelievably...uh...floppy. We did not use it for anything other than dancing around with it on because it was hilarious), but has enough give that you won't cause pain. It will cost more in a physical store but that is really your best bet. I'd suggest buying harness and dildo separately, because the dildos that come in "starter kits" tend to be 1) too thick and 2) far too soft. You'll also want a decent length. 7"ish is a good place to start.

As far as harnesses, a jock/4-strap style (that wraps around waist and legs) is a good way to start. It's comfortable, secure, and easy to find. Get one where you can change the rings. That is, the straps have snaps where they attach to it. That means that you can customize it for different toys and you can wash it without messing up the ring. You can get seamless o-rings for very cheap at a hardware store or on Amazon. I'd say get a metal ring. Stretchy silicone rings seem like a good idea, but if you tighten the harness too much and the base of the toy isn't wide enough...it will fall out of the harness. And that's awkward.