can anyone help me?

[Hazel.A]

idk.. I have really bad depression mainly because I feel so ugly. people always bullied me and i've always felt like i had no friends and that i'm alone. my parents think i'm a freak because I came out as trans to them, they don't support me whatsoever..

my hair is a mess.. it's really long.. I wish I could have it cut in a cute girly style but that's impossible.. same goes for buying / wearing female clothing..

I just feel miserable and lost and idk what to do... can anyone help?

I tried talking to a help line multiple times but it doesn't help...

[Alex_or_Ben]

Can you buy clothing online?  You can figure out your size through a sizing chart and order things online.

I have trouble getting my hair cut a certain masculine style, so you're not alone there.  I'm also stuck with clothes that are for the wrong gender mainly because I don't have much money to spare. 

I think you are at an advantage since you have long hair and a lot of girls have long hair - so you're able to cut your hair in many ways!  Try to find a hairstyle you like online and bring it somewhere to cut it similar to that.  You can get advice with other women and see what suits you.

Alexander

[Devlyn]

Big hug! Honey, if you're still here, the help line did its job, don't sell them short. You describe how others feel about you as the big problem, just live for yourself and that will be fixed. I understand it's tough living under someone else's rules, but that's why independence feels so great. 

Hugs, Devlyn

[ChiGirl]

Yes, please call a hotline.  And your parents may not support you now, but that may change.  You should be able to get them to help you find a therapist, at least to help your depression.  Then you can go from there.  You can get through.  We've all been there.  I was there last week.  But it does get better and life is worth it.  Hugs!  Remember you are not alone!

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

[Hazel.A]

these are my measurements

Frame  31.5

Bust 34

Waist 27.5

Hips 34

i'm also 5'7 tall


It's mostly my hair / face that I hate.. my nose is too big (and it looks red too..), I get spots all the time and they won't go away (had them for 7 years now..) my hair is long and messy and not cute at all.. I just wish I could have it cut into a cute style..

[Kova V]

Time for a game of 20 questions!

1) Are there any local lgbt support groups near you?

2) how much does it cost to have your hair cut by a professional?

C) do you have a job?

5) when you move out (IMO you should move out) , where do you want to live?

4) Can you try meeting people from the lgbt community from the city you want to move to before you move there? They may be able to help recommend jobs and room mates etc.

5) Do you have any savings?  save money, you'll need it when you move!

Can you find someone to rent a flat with you?

9) move already!! (okay that wasn't a question)

20) I ran out of questions. The end.

All jokes aside, if your family doesn't support you then you need to make a new family that does. If your previous threads were sincere about suicide, what have you got to lose? I know you can have a good life. I AM curious about your answers to my list.

[Hazel.A]

Time for a game of 20 questions!

1) Are there any local lgbt support groups near you?

2) how much does it cost to have your hair cut by a professional?

C) do you have a job?

5) when you move out (IMO you should move out) , where do you want to live?

4) Can you try meeting people from the lgbt community from the city you want to move to before you move there? They may be able to help recommend jobs and room mates etc.

5) Do you have any savings?  save money, you'll need it when you move!

Can you find someone to rent a flat with you?

9) move already!! (okay that wasn't a question)

20) I ran out of questions. The end.

All jokes aside, if your family doesn't support you then you need to make a new family that does. If your previous threads were sincere about suicide, what have you got to lose? I know you can have a good life. I AM curious about your answers to my list.

there are no lgbt groups near me, I think the closest ones are hours away.. I don't have a job so even if I wanted to have my hair cut I can't.. I don't know where I'd want to live.. just away from here I guess.. I have money that my parents saved for me but idk if they'll let me have it now.. as for moving.. I have nowhere to go, i'm too scared and weak to do anything on my own..

[Ms Grace]

Hi! It seems that you are currently overwhelmed by depression and it is making it hard for you to tackle anything. Depressed people are frequently hypercritical of their appearance, believe nothing they do makes a difference, that everything and everyone is against them and that there is no point in doing anything because they will fail and fail spectacularly. These are all beliefs and most commonly not founded in reality.

You said the help line didn't work, but as Devlyn rightly points out, you are still here so yes, it did work. That's the crisis averted for the moment and my suggestion is that you try to deal with your depression and lack of confidence first. Forget about the details of your appearance, forget about how your hair looks, forget about the hundreds of other things weighing you down and playing on your mind - those are all symptoms of your depression. Finding someone who can help you deal with that, either through temporary medical intervention or other means such as therapy, should go a long way towards lifting your mood, your sense of worth and your confidence. When that happens many of those things that seem impossible to deal with will suddenly be easier to deal with or so inconsequential you'll wonder why they bothered you in the first place.

I speak from personal experience - but I will also add that it doesn't happen overnight, it takes time and effort on your part... but you can do it.

[Mariah]

I would love to have some of your measurements. I'm 5 foot 7 myself so I know how that goes. You really have a good foundation to work with and my natural hair is a mess and from what I can tell I will be using a wig for the rest of my life and I'm just fine with that. However there is a lot that can be done with your own hair. More than you realize. Hugs
Mariah

[sparrow]

Are you planning to go to college / have you yet?  There's federal aid, there's grants, and college towns tend to be MUCH more liberal than the surrounding area.  One problem with federal aid, though... for some reason, you need your parents' tax forms.  Make a deal with them: you can get out of their lives in exchange for a little bit of paperwork.

You aren't a freak.  Your parents are simply ignorant.  You probably live within a mile of somebody a lot like you, but they're afraid to show it.

My wife ditched her parents, bought a train ticket across the country with $500 in her pocket.  She spent a few months in youth hostels 'til she ran out of money, and then was homeless for a while until she started making contacts and finding work.  She looks back on it all as a charming adventure.

[Ofelia]

Being girly is a gift we are given by .. ourselves! Listen to Veruca Salt or Metric or even Katy Perry if you don't like good music. Music was my first outlet.

Then you discover ebay and online shopping. Get a post office box and the world of feminine clothing opens up!

Then free your mind. You are the one who decides who you are. That's what's so special about this life

[Alex_or_Ben]

Thank you Ofelia, for your optimism.  There's also thrift shops that you can go to with cheaper clothing.  It worked for me.

Alexander