Lost and feeling alone in the U.S.

[caprice]

Hi all. I joined here just the other day in the hope I can make a bunch of good friends as well seek advice. I'm feeling isolated as well as completely lost right now and just don't know what to do or where to head for? I came over from Europe to start a new life here but nothing appears to be going to plan and as a result I have been living in and out of motels for the last 6 months 'not very pleasant as well as costly.' I came here because my boyfriend then comes from TX but he turned out to be really bad news in many ways so I decide to give him the elbow and took off alone.

I'm now in Indiana on the boarder near to KY. I could just rent an apartment over in KY but refrained from doing so cuz I'm finding it a bit hard here in Indiana or KY as I don't know anyone and finding it difficult to find any organizations like LGBT or anything. I just want to make a small network of friends who are ts f/m or m/f or gay friends to show me around a little so I don't feel alone. The other thing is I can't find a decent Endo anywhere here.
The weather here is also unpredictable like real nice one moment and the next buckets of rain and cloudy.
I would prefer blue skies and plenty of sunshine as I don't mind the heat and would like to move over to California but for one I wouldn't know where in California to head for and plus it looks like mega expensive to live there and to be honest I am really done with the motel thingy now and would like to settle somewhere I feel happier.

I hear Austin TX is liberal minded? I also thought maybe Phoenix AZ but from what I've researched I can't find any facilities there like LGBT or a good Endo, unless someone can please enlighten me. Other than that it would be California but not LA. If anyone comes from any of these places I would be really grateful for any positive feedback please.

I would prefer to get to meet people within the LGBT community in either those places and that way I would feel I am in better hands. Any help would be appreciated because ideally I want to be on my way before next Monday.

Ok, the thing is, I was raised in the US as a child and then my folks moved out of the US when I was in my early teens so obviously I had to go with them. I had my surgeries when I was 18 and I am now in my mid 30's and look just like a natural female but I do have some hormonal issues even still and that is why I want to find me a good Endo. I've seen 2 since I've been here who are over in TX and they were both utterly useless and a waste of time.

The other thing is; since the last few years something strange has happened to me and I'm feeling really mixed-up in my mind and just don't know how to deal with it or what to do, and this is what is unsettling me and that is, I am now starting to get feelings towards lesbians and shying away from men. I never used to feel this way ever before and have always had boyfriends. This is not towards any woman ever as that wouldn't happen, it's kinda when I see a certain person I know it's right for me but too afraid and have never acted on it. It's not a sexual thing but more of a companionship/sharing kind of thing and trust and I have this thing in my mind it could be more loving and romantic rather than what I've been used to with guys. Maybe I'm'a bit mixed-up  or maybe I just don't trust men anymore. But having said that a F/M TS also sounds like a good thing for me and would be nice to get to know some first hand. Maybe I just need to settle somewhere and make some good friends who I feel I can trust and let things take their natural course? So, any help regards to either Austin TX or Phoenix AZ or California would be the best help ever please.

The reason I haven't put a photo of me up here, after reading how many TS women have been murdered this year alone has made me really nervous and for another to-date I have lived completely in stealth and am nervous about that too.

My interests are; I am a musician, I love horse riding, I enjoy working out and keeping fit in the gym and I really love playing tennis and could play everyday and the other thing may sound a bit funny but I've got a bit of a car thing and love driving cars

Love to hear from anyone.

Thanks

Caprice



 

[LordKAT]

HI caprice,

I also live in the US but WI, not Indiana. I've not heard real good things about TX for LGBT folk. I know we have other members who live or lived in Indiana, perhaps they can help you out.

[katrinaw]

Hi Caprice, welcome...

I'm not from the US, but I still like cars, well driving them fast...

Sorry you had a bit of a rough ride, relationship wise... and hope you can settle somewhere soon.

L Katy 

[Valwen]

hmm austin TX is like the one oasis of sanity in a state where people can more or less kill you just for being trans (its not that bad but most of the time if something dose happen going to the police will not end well) but austin is good.

In Cali san fransisco, san diago, and even LA are great though the whole state tends to be good, just stay out of sunnydale too many vampires.

on the other coast Massachusetts is a great place to be trans as well, though specialized medical care is easiest around the bigger cites like springfeild and boston, especially boston the fenway health center specialises in LGBT health, and anywhere your new patient forms include a section for perfered name and pronouns gets a A+ in my book. they also deliver meds throughout the state if your not close to boston.

so ya lots of options the hardest part will be houseing, sadly the more liberal LGBT friendly areas are usually also high cost of living areas.

Sorry if this didn't help
Serena

[Eva Marie]

Hi Caprice! I've lived in all of the states you've mentioned. Kentucky is one of the harder states to live in as a transgender person due to the lack of legal protections and it doesn't surprise me about the lack of resources that you've encountered there. Austin is the most California-like city in Texas; if I weren't living in California Austin would be a strong second choice. I think that you'd find lots of support and resources in Austin but I hear it's gotten pretty pricey to live there from friends that live there, probably due to the influx of people moving there from California. I live in a suburb that is just northwest of L.A. - the legal protections here are outstanding and finding really good, experienced medical help for us is not hard. Yes, it is an expensive place to live but given all of the positives I have here as well as the number of transgender friends I've made here I have no plans to move elsewhere. And you can't beat the weather! Good luck with wherever you decide to settle.

[MsMarlo]

Hi Caprice.

Any of the southern states are going to be rough, especially the further you go.  Alabama is a horrible place to be transgendered; Mississippi is not much better.  Your bigger cities will be more tolerant, but you still have to be careful. 

What type of instrument do you play?  I'm a guitarist with 45 years experience, four of them professionally.  Depending on your level, you might want to consider giving lessons.  Plenty of people in our community (LBGT) would love to learn to play an instrument.

After all, we have to take care of our own, yes?

Nice to meet you sweetie :-)

[FriendsCallMeChris]

Hi caprice, I just moved from Austin TX last week. I was so sad to leave. It is VERY trans friendly. I'll give you my medical and therapy contacts if you want them
Also Dallas TX has some huge pro trans groups. Houston would be okay. Like  most states, bigger cities in TX are more diverse.

[Jerri]

hi Caprice,
I live north of Seattle in the northwest corner of US, I moved here from Alaska, the climate is mild, social acceptance is very good and medical access and support is very good. so the weather does not line up so well with sunny and warm as it would in southern regions, but it seems to be a good place and I feel comfortable and am able to work as me without to much grief..
good luck and welcome to our side of the pond

[V M]

Hi Caprice 

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M

[Sydney Spitfire]

Hello, welcome to Susan's hope you enjoy this place

[caprice]

Hi Caprice! I've lived in all of the states you've mentioned. Kentucky is one of the harder states to live in as a transgender person due to the lack of legal protections and it doesn't surprise me about the lack of resources that you've encountered there. Austin is the most California-like city in Texas; if I weren't living in California Austin would be a strong second choice. I think that you'd find lots of support and resources in Austin but I hear it's gotten pretty pricey to live there from friends that live there, probably due to the influx of people moving there from California. I live in a suburb that is just northwest of L.A. - the legal protections here are outstanding and finding really good, experienced medical help for us is not hard. Yes, it is an expensive place to live but given all of the positives I have here as well as the number of transgender friends I've made here I have no plans to move elsewhere. And you can't beat the weather! Good luck with wherever you decide to settle.

Hi Eva, sorry for late reply, I've not been having a good time at all in TX, in fact I don't like it here at all anymore and have thought about coming to live in CA but don't have any friends there or know where to go or begin?

[caprice]

Hi Caprice.

Any of the southern states are going to be rough, especially the further you go.  Alabama is a horrible place to be transgendered; Mississippi is not much better.  Your bigger cities will be more tolerant, but you still have to be careful. 

What type of instrument do you play?  I'm a guitarist with 45 years experience, four of them professionally.  Depending on your level, you might want to consider giving lessons.  Plenty of people in our community (LBGT) would love to learn to play an instrument.

Sorry for late reply, not having a good time here on TX.

I play guitar and used to write for a living. Played since I was real young and played professionally and used to do session work in studios.

After all, we have to take care of our own, yes?

Nice to meet you sweetie :-)

[Kylie1]

Valwen said what I would have said.  California is the place to go.  Anything but the Midwest bible belt.  There are LGBT communities  in every large city, but the last time I was in San Francisco it was very welcoming to anyone and everyone.