Deportment & self-defence.

[Heather Exley]

Hi Everyone,

During my first year of transition/HRT I did two thing that I have found to be really useful.

First I did four one hour sessions of what used to be called "Deportment". You may have seen film of young girls walking about with books balanced upon their heads, well it not like that any more but it was really useful. Many of us have gone through vocal training to help us to sound like a woman and deportment helped me to move like woman. Has anyone else tried this or something similar.

Second I did a proper self-defence course. Not a quick afternoon but two hours a week for thirteen weeks. I have never had to use the skills I learned. The benefit came from gaining physical confidence. I have found the number one thing that helps with passing as a Woman in public is confidence, self-defence lessons have given me this confidence in spades.

I'd love to hear other peoples thoughts.

Love & electronic hugs to all my Brothers & Sisters out there. 

[IdontEven]

Those both sound like really great suggestions. I didn't even know Deportment classes were still a thing!

[Heather Exley]

Hi IdontEven,

I hope we can soon call you by "real" name, I've soon worked out that this is really friendly place but we all take our journey at our own speed.
I got the deportment lessons from a lady who also ran classes for modelling. What I learnt was how to move with a little more grace and elegance. I started transition from a fairly unconvincing male to female at 43 so I'd picked up alot of male posture that is hard to get rid of. Being able to move like a woman will convince others your a woman from a long way away.

Love & Hugs Babe.

[Equestriaghoul]

I was going to try the thing thing the books, but I haven't yet, as for self defense, I was thinking of taking a course or a few at some point, but I also think I'm going to start carrying a pistol.

[Jayne]

As I've posted many times on here, I've had training in two martial arts and never needed to use them, I demonstrated a takedown on a man last year who is well trained in karate and best described as burly, I didn't put any effort into the takedown technique taught to me as opposite lock and almost threw him across the room (I'm best described as scrawny by the way).
I've had confrontations but haven't had to use force due to exuding confidence.

as for self defense, I was thinking of taking a course or a few at some point, but I also think I'm going to start carrying a pistol.

I can't recommend self defence training enough.
I was taught how to use weapons and how to disarm people with weapons (not guns as im in the UK), the brothers who taught me drummed this message home "if you do not know how to use a weapon then it's more dangerous to you than the other person, if someone hesitates to use a weapon against you then the weapon belongs to you"
A gun in my opinion gives a false sense of security.

[Jayvin]

The deportment class is actually an interesting point. I've noticed that guys tend to walk in a more bouncy way, while gals tend to put all of it into a sway. Just from what i've noticed, clearly this doesn't happen with everybody. But basically, looks to me that females can generally walk straight without going up/down much (height-wise) and compensate for that with the way they sway their hips to avoid it. So they tend to be able to hold water without spilling it from walking normally. Guys seem to be more likely to exaggerate their shoulder movements in comparison.

Mostly just noting it in case it helps somebody, when I was younger I had deportment classes. We did that "hold an egg in a spoon" thing a lot, and even just holding a very full cup of water and trying to walk around at a "decent speed" without spilling. It appeared to me that when doing this, even the guys ended up having to sway their hips for it. So that might help if you're trying to get the sway down?

[Zumbagirl]

I love to be physically fit. I'm not zumba girl for nothing Many years ago I was into self defense and martial arts. These days I have become more of a realist and decided to get my gun license. In the process I have spent about $1500 on special concealed carry lessons including scenario based training (getting carjacked, getting a knife to the throat, fighting back in darkness, etc). Nothing like realistic training to make one more aware. It was honestly an eye opening event for me to make me begin to realize how thieves and criminals target women and how best to prepare myself in the event of something ever happening. The one thing I took away from my martial arts training and gun training is situational awareness. Draw a 21 foot diameter circle around yourself and notice everyone is inside that circle. Thieves look for people playing with cell phones, not paying attention, etc. These days I pack my pepper spray, flashlight and a .357 magnum for protection.

Self defense isn't a one and done thing either. It takes practice over and over to keep the skills up. Also what was recommended to me by some firearms experts is to take self defense classes every few years but from different trainers, never the same person over and over.

[Valkyrie_2]

As I've posted many times on here, I've had training in two martial arts and never needed to use them, I demonstrated a takedown on a man last year who is well trained in karate and best described as burly, I didn't put any effort into the takedown technique taught to me as opposite lock and almost threw him across the room (I'm best described as scrawny by the way).
I've had confrontations but haven't had to use force due to exuding confidence.

I can't recommend self defence training enough.
I was taught how to use weapons and how to disarm people with weapons (not guns as im in the UK), the brothers who taught me drummed this message home "if you do not know how to use a weapon then it's more dangerous to you than the other person, if someone hesitates to use a weapon against you then the weapon belongs to you"
A gun in my opinion gives a false sense of security.

Ooh... Let's not get into the guns v no guns argument.

Fwiw, I have pistols but let my concealed carry permit expire because there are just so many places I go where I can't carry.

I'm a pretty non violent person. I'd fund it hard to hit somebody in self defense.

[Sigyn]

I am a CCW holder in a state that does not require such a permit to carry (Arizona is "constitutional carry"). I have also been an NRA instructor as well as am currently a competitive practical shooter. I carry every day.

That being said, I also take time to practice my defense drills at least once a month (which is scary considering the police only qualify at best twice a year, sometimes only once...)

I agree with the poster above that practice is a key responsibility to carrying a weapon. However, it shouldn't turn people off to it.

If anyone is interested in learning about just how firearms work or what not, I would suggest seeing if there is a 'Pink Pistol' club in your area. I have taught classes with them before, and found that they are a fine group of people... and who knows, you might have fun doing it, and pick up a new hobby.

[Jayne]

Ooh... Let's not get into the guns v no guns argument.

Fwiw, I have pistols but let my concealed carry permit expire because there are just so many places I go where I can't carry.

I'm a pretty non violent person. I'd fund it hard to hit somebody in self defense.

Sorry my bad, I didn't word my post very well. If guns were legal here I'd carry one but my first reaction would be my self defence training, if you use a weapon of any kind then there is the risk of hesitating for fear of causing serious injury.
I was taught how to disarm someone with a knife/bat/stick and make the weapon mine, all I need is a seconds hesitation from an attacker.

I understand what you say about not wanting to hurt people, I feel the same but when someone is intent on hurting you those concern evaporate and survival instinct takes over.
Its better to have the knowledge and never need it than need it and not have it.

[Valkyrie_2]

I avoid risky situations. Only once have I had to produce my gun and when he saw it, the bad guy vanished