A milestone event has happened! Switching to the womens locker room at the YMCA!

[Shawn Sunshine]

Hello my fellow feathered friends! The Day has come...I have graduated from the mens locker room and shower area at the YMCA Embarcedero San Francisco to the Womens!!!! I had a long talk with the Assistant Director and a few others to try and smooth things over for myself and for anyone else who might have a cow "thinking" a man is in there. This is huge for a family oriented health club. Someone told me it should be on the news LOL. No lets not do that I think....sure I am out to most family/friends as Transgender but I would rather not the whole world know exactly yet.

Now my only concern would be, on certain days and especially when I don't wear makeup or am all that feminine...I don't pass, I am still in that in between place, though leaning female. My pics I show you guys are all dolled up ones.

In a Gym and (especially) a pool you are kinda sweaty and/or wet and hair is flat (mine is for sure). So there would be some issues for me there about feeling like I belong.


But I am going to look past that and just dive into my locker there. I have to switch all my belongings by tonight. I have been in there a little so far to do makeup and take a quick glance (i felt if I had stared longer somehow I would be a creeper)

But there it is guys and gals! I am taking this huge step in my life. I took a smaller step just one month ago also when I had my gender marker changed in the CHANGES program for homeless services there. 311 now will place me in a women's shelter or the women's section from now on.


I cannot tell you how thrilled and relieved and blessed I am right now to be able to have this (ok well I did just tell you so LOL)

I hope to get even more courage over time and go 100% full time (unless its a two spirit day  )
I hope also to get in better shape ans get my life moving. I still have crap days, but now I have goals and I have hormones aiding my mind and body along in those goals which is what I was missing for a very long time.

Blessings to you and please stay strong and be yourself.

Love, Shawn Sunshine

[Mariah]

Congrats Shawn, that is a huge step. I'm so proud of how far you have come. Hugs
Mariah

[Lady Smith]

Congratulations Shawn, you are a brave and strong woman.  Hugs   

[Shawn Sunshine]

Thanks heh...I'm trying my best.  I won't lie though still have lots of fears.

[Shawn Sunshine]

Good news! I have some pics from inside the locker room of my accomplishment....I'm the one looking back wondering if anyone is staring at me...





But on a more serious note: I have now been in the Sauna and the shower area (but still showering in a private stall) I have everything in a locker...met a few women. Some have been nice, some have frowned. Some have ran away. No seriously they scooted very fast from me.

I have decided after the advice of a friend an a ymca employee to wear a combo of a busty tank top and ladies trunks (which pretty much look like mens trunks) I think this combo is best for now until my body improves and I feel more comfortable.

It is kind of unsettling right now. I am not sure which way is up or down. Being in here is like exploring a "new planet". Yep I mean there are of course similarities to the mens side but they are not that much.

For one it is quieter, for two it is cleaner. It has less clutter, more room and better hair dryers. Its smaller but it still feels more comfortable. My concern though is how I am going to be seen by others. I really want to fit in here and could use some help on locker room etiquette. if any of you gals have some advice, please share with me.

*edit* there's a part of me thats not sure what to do when looking at other women in there. I have been taught not to stare at naked women. I have been taught to not even look at naked women. But I have to look to talk to someone...right? I am attracted to women still so thats also an issue. Not an issue in the sense i would ever do anything in a locker room but maybe I dunno...them worrying about me? uGH SO i DO please need some advice.

[rosinstraya]

Congratulations- women in change rooms don't bite. Mostly! 

[Shawn Sunshine]

Hope so...I think maybe a few growls but yep no bites.

Here's the thing...should I be feeling guilty about finding women attractive in the locker room? Should I be feeling bad about wanting to look at them for more than a few seconds without looking like a creepy person....this is. Where I'm confused. I mean how do lesbians handle this?

[stephaniec]

I think I'd be very careful about that.

[Shawn Sunshine]

Why can't I just be friendly? I mean I'm talking about in the same way I was to a degree with men......that's what I'd rather do. Just chat and shower.

[stephaniec]

nothing wrong with chatting, but you  were talking about sitting and staring which someone might find offensive especially if they suspect you might be transgender. You said that there were some women who seemed to be giving you a disapproving look. Now if one of those women is watching you and your staring and see suspects you might be trans it could cause some problems.

[Shawn Sunshine]

Well there have been a few women staring at me in a good way and complimentin me...so that parts awesome

[Lady Smith]

*edit* there's a part of me thats not sure what to do when looking at other women in there. I have been taught not to stare at naked women. I have been taught to not even look at naked women. But I have to look to talk to someone...right? I am attracted to women still so thats also an issue. Not an issue in the sense i would ever do anything in a locker room but maybe I dunno...them worrying about me? uGH SO i DO please need some advice.

It's all about custody of the eyes Shawn (if I may use a delightfully old fashioned phrase).  When speaking to other women focus on (not stare at) their eyes and all will be well.

[KristinaM]

Eyes up and smile, concise movements, don't linger.  It's ok to glance, but basically act the same way as the men's locker room I'd imagine.  You wouldn't stare at a man's crotch or chest would you?  Unless you're admiring their muscles or something maybe, that's probably ok, but not the plumpness of their bottoms or breasts, lol.  Be pleasant and confident, that's all you can do.  Otherwise you'll seem out of place possibly.

[Shawn Sunshine]

Yep most definitely would not stare at a man's crotch