Big warm welcome to Susan's Stephen
hugs... I know exactly where you are at, I have kept secrets for way to many years... and you, internally, can't hide from it, you can create a charade for the external, but its eats you up inside until you just want to burst out. The more folks you come out to the easier it becomes.
Hope you can find a therapist that can help you, best wishes for your journey and finally talking with your partner, whenever that time is xxxx
Look forward to seeing you about the forum's.
L Katy