Just joined this forum and thought I should introduce myself.
I'm Naomi, from Schiedam, the Netherlands, am 43 years old, was recently diagnosed with gender disphoria (MtF). In eight weeks from now I'll have my intake in the genderpoli of the VU in Amsterdam which seems to be a very good place for transitioning, so I hope for the best.
Last week I told my close family son and friends about my female gender and to my astonishment they all reacted positively. I've been too scared to tell for 35 years. When I was eight, I was the only "boy" in my ballet class, all my friends were girls and i identified with being one myself. I had been able to hide this life from my class mates, but one day a bully from my school attended a performance and I was "found out". The next day at school I was called a "->-bleeped-<-got" beaten up and this continued for the next two years.
From then on I understood it was "wrong" to be that way and have been trying not to ever since. I compensated with behavior I thought typically male in all kinds of ways, became a father, started an internet business, but was never fully able to repress my identyity and it found its way out to express itself (sometimes in extreme ways), mostly dating men, seeking some kind of acknowledgement for my femininity.
This continued until the 27th of April this year (king's day in Holland), when I actually had a heart attack. I nearly died and realized I would have played some kind of act for most of my life, if I had died. Ever since, I decided to live authentically and part of that is becoming a woman.