Quote from: Larisa1983 on September 07, 2015, 04:38:26 PM
Okay so I was on this conservative facebook page. Im a conservative and libertarian and it was one I follow that came up.
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TRIGGER WARNING
TRIGGER WARNING
First of all, hugs. I know that gets said an awful lot around here but I mean it.
Secondly, I'm a libertarian, conservative and independent. I am really beholden to no political party but I lean more on the conservative side. I am a strong believer in things like the 2nd and 1st amendment and market forces fixing problems. I am also a Catholic. Yes, my church and I have some disagreements but I pray that God will help them come around.
I am a strong believer in the 2nd amendment and I help with activism and education. I am also a better shot than most of them, in that I can hit stuff at 60 yards with a handgun some of them can't even hit at 10 with a rifle. I often joke and said that I'm a transgender Annie Oakley, lol.
I am also somewhat revered by these people because of what I do for a living. I work for one of the more conservative leaning media outlets. (You can probably figure out which one). It's not something I advertise a lot but people know. I sometimes meet some pretty controversial and popular figures in the conservative sphere, and some of them probably don't know they are interacting with a trans woman.
Anyway, when I first came out as trans I endured a lot of hate.
Actually I never intended to come out, I was just going to disappear. But then I opened my big mouth and said I was going to Korea and needed a ride to the airport. Lo and behold, questions were asked and I spilled the tea. So I kind of got drawn into it.
Eventually I came out on social media with a new name and I burned my old one.
That's when all hell broke loose. One or two guys pretty much took to harassing me a lot when they realized who I was (most people thought I was my wife). One of them I kind of expected it since he's Jamaican and that's how they roll over there.
I got insults thrown at me left and right. Even two of my so-called close friends decided to deadname me and insult me repeatedly, despite telling him me over and over when I came out to him privately that "I have your six."
Anyway the insults I got primarily were:
"You look like a man!"
"No man will want to <blank> you!"
"If you cut off your <part> you still won't be a woman. You will just be a man without a <part>."
"Can't change genes, X and Y you will always be a man!"
That was the tamest of all of it. There was worse. I won't post it here but you get the point.
They also mixed in insults about Caitlyn Jenner and Fallon Fox.
But, apart from standing on my own and showing people that I am serious, I had other people helping me counter the negativity. I carried on, head held high.I carried myself with dignity and showed that I am well endowed with knowledge, experience and skill about 2nd amendment and conservative issues and that I am not a joke or a freak.
Eventually nearly all the anti-trans stuff just died down and went away. It didn't fully go away as people still tend to post offensive memes and such but the really bad stuff is gone.
You know what also happened? (Cisgender) women approached me and supported me
as one of their own. Some do not know I am trans. Some do. I only told a few privately. I don't know how many have figured me out but I would be lying if I said that number was zero. One of them, a leader of a shooting club told me that, "We want you as a member and we support you 100%. Please join us." I attended their meeting and was hooked. They are some of the nicest people I have ever went to the range with, and it is so much nicer hanging out with a group of ladies than it is with a bunch of guys.
You know what else? I use the women's restroom and the same people that insulted me see me going there and don't say a word. Nobody is brave enough to tell me anything because I will tell them where to stick it.
By the way one of the guys who was a good friend and insulted me over and over is no longer my friend. Pretty much everyone hated his attitude after that so he lost nearly all of his friends. He comes crawling back on facebook to me but I told him where to go. That's another thing. I am not afraid to use the unfriend button. If someone decides they want to be a pain, I unfriend them. My life is too short to waste with negativity.
So anyway, my advice:
Chin up! Head up!
Don't let the haters worry you.
Look for some allies and stick with them.
Dump people who cause you grief, if necessary.
Realize that not everyone is going to embrace and accept you, but at the very least don't just sit down and take it from them.
