To transition or not to transition did a specific event push you over.

[stephaniec]

My specific event that was the catalyst was the lost of my job of 20 years. A few weeks before I knew I had no job I had gone to a therapist because I was tired of being alone and then as things seem to happen I lost my job  the company went down.  thus, the rebirth. I wouldn't of even of tried probably if I would of just kept moving on like a zombie with that job.

[buttertly]

I was doing webcam whoring for fun, which led to youtube videos. I saw how many men complimented me, so I gave it a go. Sadly, I now realize, it's women you have to please, not men.

I'm so sick of their dirty looks and death stares.

[Ange]

Things going bad with my wife, overall, made me reconsider the question. Both sexual and life-choice problems (children..), as well as being overall tired of it all. 

[suzifrommd]

I met up with two post-transition transgender women from Susan's. We spent the day together in a public place. No one stared. No one gave us a hard time. It was a perfectly normal day.

It helped me understand that I could live as a woman without being seen as a freak.

[Cindy]

I woke up with yet another hangover. I decided to have my third attempt at killing myself, I was going to walk in front of  train. I had a medical appointment and I went to it; I was not able to hurt the train driver.

I confessed.

Mea Culpa.

I transitioned.

I saved the train driver and I saved me.

Short story, long journey.

[Lady Smith]

One morning I woke up and looked at myself in the mirror and I just knew to the core of my being that I couldn't keep on with living a lie.

[KristinaM]

I came out to my wife by accident after watching a documentary on transgender children, telling her something to the effect of, "I used to be trans, that's what was wrong with me all those years."

Two days later I was like, "holy crap, I didn't USED TO BE trans, I AM trans..."  ::cue the thunder, lightning, and organ music::

And I started gobbling up info, making plans, and telling close friends almost immediately.

[Swayallday]

My whole life has been the turning point.

Specifically though:

I've always wanted an extended wardrobe
my stepfather, angrily, asked me why I just don't go out to a dancing in a dress and high heels?

& that was the turning point of discovering the issue runs much, much deeper.

[Naomi71]

A heart attack last april definitely was my turning point.

[stephaniec]

I know in my case it was the imminent threat of homelessness that made me realize that why live in pain with absolutely no purpose. I have a purpose now even though the purpose is to excel in being a woman.

[Beth Andrea]

Yes, it was the realization that "he" was in the process of dying.

Not the body, the soul; his existence was painful, mine was joy.

My life is not full-on joy like it was, adult responsibilities take their toll, but the pain of the shattering is gone.




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[Orchid]

I was slowly going downhill, and then there was a drastic boom at eighteen where I sunk deep into depression.

Shortly after I began researching the term transgender, when I was not afraid to identify with it. From then on I began to feel happy and found a sense of purpose again.

[DanielleA]

When I was young, I was tampered with by an older guy. That started the ball rolling. After it happened I made a concious decision to never be like him (a man) when I grew up. I already knew that I was different from them anyway and found it soothing being in girls clothes, doing things with the girls, being identified as a girl ect. It was ment to be.

[Christine Eryn]

Turning 30. I did not want another decade of living a tortured existence.

[Valwen]

Hmm a bit dragged out but it was probebly a mix of things. my 50th or so near scare with self harm/badness. which happend at the same time i was reading a web comic (RAIN) the presentation of the transgender teen main characters therapist made me give therapy another shot. that helped and led to me seeing a doctor and starting HRT but it was not the real trigger for being out there. at that time it was all hush hush I told family and a few friends and made vauge far off plans I would likely push back more and more. Then for my birthday I made a crazy decision to go to therapy presenting as myself. it was my first time out as me and it was supposed to be a one off a short trial run one afternoon out, and things went well. Better than I could have thought and then I was talking to a friend I had come out to and I made a joke about the falsies I made for that one day and they thought I meant I was going to show up to a public gathering full of people I know but dont know well as serena. It seemed crazy I could never do that...but I was still on a high from that one day out, and the support friends and therapy had given me plus too much icecream cake...so I did it. Nothing happend, no one freaked out no one called me names, people took it in stride.. so long story short 2 weeks later was the last time I presented as male. Last saturday I heard back from the court, my name change was offical and today I changed my name and gender on my social security records.

it has happend so fast I wake up some mornings and cant remember if it was all a dream or not. :-)

Serena, Who's story starts with wanting to die and ends with a Smile.

[Eva Marie]

One night I was engaged in my nightly drink-a-thon session and I realized that if I kept going I had a future date with a pine box in a hole 6 feet under. I knew that I had to do something. That's a very sobering realization.

I scheduled my first appointment with my therapist soon after, and the rest is history.

[stephaniec]

quite an interesting mix of things. I'm just glad it happened for myself. It's pretty messed up, I wanted so badly to do it , but never  able to take that first solid step . I've been wondering a lot lately if the first psychiatrist I went to back in college would of shown me the path if I would of been able to take it. Mentally I've been through a lot in my life with this being an incredibly powerful undercurrent . I find it just so cool that I'm here though.

[findingreason]

For me it was realizing that the lie I kept trying to live was falling apart. I knew with my depressive cycles and self-harm risks, eventually it would kill me. The house of cards was collapsing.

I particularly remember a moment that really stood out to me with my therapist shortly before HRT when I was doubting myself. She asked me two questions: "Where do you see yourself in 10 years as a woman?" and I was able to give a hazy answer. She then asked me "Where do you see yourself in 10 years as a man" and my reply was ".....I can't even answer that question." It became increasingly clear after that.

I also asked myself the question "Would you regret your life at your death bed if you never tried to transition and never knew what it would be like?" and my answer was a startling yes. Knowing that life can be taken at any time for any reason, I realized that while I am young, there is still a chance such as situation *could* happen. I didn't want to take that risk of regret of not living my life fully.

And here I am, today. More alive than ever because of it.

[Martine A.]

I presume by transitioning is meant to seek medical help.

The event that initiated my desire to seek help is that I understood benefits of hrt. I lived uneducated.

[Zoetrope]

I spent a couple of years living on internet chat, pretending to be a real girl.

When even that life felt so much better than the one I came from - you could say the penny dropped.