After you came out

[Jake25]

Did any family members or friends ignore the fact that you came out and act like nothing happened?

[AndrewB]

Well... sort of? I sent my grandfather a second letter along with his 'Thank You' card at Christmas time, explaining everything and assuring him that it was totally fine to contact me with questions and stuff via e-mail, phone, etc., but received nothing of the sort. Come late May, my mom called him, asked if he would want a ticket to my graduation, and he just blew up on her, called she and my dad horrible parents, yakkity yak like that. She just told him off, and when he tried sending us a letter in the mail, she threw it out and told him never to contact us again. So. I guess it started out as ignoring and pretending I'd never sent the letter, but eventually became something else.

I think at some point, anyone that "ignores" your identity and pretends it doesn't exist is bound to either blow up or be blown up on, most likely by you, for disregarding your feelings.

[Mariah]

Jake, I have a couple who try to act like nothing happened. Needless to say I don't keep in contact with them as a result. If they choose to ignore what is going on then I don't have to act like hey exist either. Some people refuse to moved forward and as a result get left behind. Hugs
Mariah

[Obfuskatie]

It may just be a matter of seeing exactly how determined you are. A lot of people will think you are going through a phase. It isn't that they don't take you seriously, it's that they don't understand. I had to come out to my mom twice, the first time I was very vague, because I was terrified of rejection. Once I made it clear to her in very certain terms how I felt, she went through all the stages of grief processing it, but she's been my biggest supporter. I'd avoid writing anyone off because of their reaction, just make sure that you don't let anyone discourage you from being true to yourself.

[capnkyler]

Yes! This. This is exactly what my mom did. Frustrating, to say the least.


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[EmilyRyan]

Yup despite all the crap I went through when coming out they choose to act like nothing happened.  I can only imagine what's going to happen when I try to come out again 

[veniamviam]

Yep, happened to me too. Most everyone knew, and nobody said a word about it. I didn't have the guts to do anything about it at the time, so I just kind of... left it. And came out again (for "real" this time) a little while later. The few friends I had were pretty cool about it, using all the right words for me, but family? Nah, everyone ignored it the first time around.

[KristinaM]

Once I come out at work next year, Kristina will be the only "me" left behind, so my mom is gonna need to fast track her stages of grief. No more hiding.

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[Toddin3D]

After coming out, my parents seem to ignore it - mostly my mother. They're both under the belief that this is either a phase or that I've "brainwashed" myself because I'm on the computer too often. Odd, because it was pretty clear that I was trans when I was a kid and did NOT have access to the internet but oh well.

I am irritated by it (or completely enraged whenever they bring up the "brainwashing" excuse), but I'm trying to be patient with them. My dad is the most likely to change within the next few months when I make routine visits to the therapist. Can't say the same for my mom, she's going through her own stages of grief as well.

[SofiN]

Unfortunately I have this problem right now with my immediate family. They say they support me but are doing absolutely nothing about it.

Deliberate misgendering and using my old name despite knowing and telling ME off if I dare to correct them. I can't exactly help the way I am. It is extremely depressing and makes me want to run away from home. They don't seem to care how important it is to me.

I don't know how I'm going to cope with this while waiting the 1 year for my first GIC appointment.