I need advice...

[jtowne87]

I'm very unhappy. Living a lie. Blah blah blah. You get it...
I need to talk to somebody!



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[Dena]

Welcome to Susan's Place. Until you reach 15 post it will need to be by post. You didn't leave much of a description so it's a bit open as to why you are unhappy. We deal with the non binary which include gender fluid, cross dressers and gender queer in addition to other variations. The remaining group is transsexual. As I have posted to this thread, I will be notified when you make a post to it.

You may have had these feelings all you life or you may have just noticed them. You could be young or old. Treatment from a gender therapist should be on your list but we might be able to help you explore a bit. If you are unsure what you feel, go to youtube and watch "the transition channel". This may give you a name for what you are feeling. Let us know a bit more about you and we will continue from there.

We issue to all new members the following links so you will best be able to use the web site.

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

[Cindy]

Hi Hon,

Welcome to the site.

Lots of people come here feeling a bit confused, sad, left out of life. But we are all here to help.

There are men and women here who have completed their journey and stay around to help those who are starting.

So don't be shy, join in.

I bet there is nothing you say that I haven't seen from someone before! So just post away.

[jtowne87]

I'm married to a woman. Anorexic. Bulimic. And I've always felt like a female!


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[LizK]

I'm married to a woman. Anorexic. Bulimic. And I've always felt like a female!


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So what would you like to do about that if you could...if there were no other people to consider...

[jtowne87]

I would live as a woman.


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[Dena]

I have to go to work but it is possible for you do live as a woman. It's never easy to transition but it is possible with work. We can provide you with the information you need to transition and you can ask our opinion for dealing with your problems. In the end, all the decisions will need to be yours.

Many people have had to deal with spouse issues and almost all of us had to deal with the fear of transitioning. It is far easer to deal with it now you have the resource of Susan's to draw from. Just let us know if you are ready to start and where you want to start. The transition is personal and each person has different resources and needs so you will need to customize the plan to meet your needs.

[jtowne87]

Thank you so much.


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[Laura_7]

Here are some links that might help you:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,194986.msg1737439.html#msg1737439

You might start out slow, try a few changes to hair and clothing style...
look for a good gender therapist to help you along...
or ask for counseling at plannedparenthood or a lgbt center...


hugs

[jtowne87]

Thank you


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[Laura_7]

Thank you


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You're welcome.
Just keep asking questions.
People like to help.

[jtowne87]

Everyone seems so nice here. How do you stay so positive? I just want to end it all like every other day...


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[Dena]

Everyone seems so nice here. How do you stay so positive? I just want to end it all like every other day...


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I have a little theory on that. I think to really appreciate life you have to hurt bad before that. Pretty much everybody here once felt like you do now. Through hard work changing their life and dealing with their fears, they ended the pain and can now feel the joy of life. I am post surgical 33 years and I still have that grin on my face all the time. Now every day its a joy just to be alive. My hell lasted between age 13 and somewhere around 29 but that is in the past and it no longer hurts to think about it. Others here are into their transition or are pretty new post surgical and for the first time in a long time are becoming free of their pain. Some of them are just a little beyond you but they see hope.

You found us and that's the first step. We need to get you to a gender therapist and we need to think about your wife as well. I have always been single which made the transition easer for me but many here have transitioned with wives and they will be able to advise you.

[jtowne87]

Thank you so much. Very wise words! I probably need to get the anorexia/bulimia under control before I move forward. I don't really know?


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[Dena]

You should be in therapy as well. You could also consider beard removal as that takes time as well. There is much you can work on before the transitions starts and it will make things go faster when you are ready.

[jtowne87]

Thanks.


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[Laura_7]

I probably need to get the anorexia/bulimia under control before I move forward.

Well those issues could have to do with self worth and self value.

You might just try to take it easy, see this all as a step by step process and take the next step...
not stressing out too much... it might take some time but its all manageable.