So for the last few months I have been going to the Goodlife Community Center (am I allowed to give their name?) in a nearby suburb.
I first started going with my Nana. She would do water aerobics and I would go to their gym. Everything was good, except the, and you knew this was coming, changing room situation. Sometimes it was OK using the men's facilities, if there was no-one else in there, but I still had that feeling in my stomach that I shouldn't be there, that it was dangerous, it was much worse when there were naked men everywhere!
My Nana loves her water aerobics and talking to the other ladies that go and I enjoy going to the gym, I have made so much progress with diet and exercise, I didn't want to jeopardise that for either of us.
I kept quiet and tried not to draw attention to myself but the anxiety kept building up.
I was scared of what would happen if I out myself, I have heard so many horror stories (being asked to leave, being made to feel uncomfortable, being judged, etc) and knowing that the goodlife center is a Christian organisation run by the Goodlife Church made me more worried (I know that is unfair, there are many good, open minded and non-judgemental Christians).
So, after leaving this for as long as I could bare, I spoke with the gym manager about my options as a trans patron.
I told her about myself, the progress I had made, my transition, my anxiety, and that I was willing to compromise.
I know that there are those of us who would like to use facilities appropriate to our gender and that there are those among cispeople who see mtf trans as "male infiltrators" or potential sex offenders or worse.
Knowing this I said that I was prepared to use the "Special needs" facilities so not to make anyone else uncomfortable, and yes I know it sounds like a cop-out and I should fight for my rights yada yada yada.
The first thing the gym manager told me was that she admires my bravery in coming out and in transitioning, that it is not up to her to judge and she believes god made us all even transpeople.
She goes on to say that she will try her best to ensure that I feel comfortable in coming to the gym and that the compromise I suggested would be the best solution, at least until I am further along in my transition.
She then tells me that while she has no issues with transgender people there may be some other gym users who will notice the physical changes will be going through and may try to cause problems but bigotry is against the code of conduct members sign but that some may be curious.
I told her I was happy answering questions, questions mean that you are trying to understand.
She also asked if I would mind her sharing what we had talked about with the other gym staff and I was happy with that.
The next day while working out I was stopped by a strange man and for a second I nearly panicked. It was the Center manager and he wanted to get to know me and learn about my transition. Once I had finished my workout I spent over an hour discussing transitioning, faith, and how I would handle any issues that came up while at the gym. I think he wanted to be sure I could diffuse anyone who had a problem with me, but we had a good talk and I feel that coming out to these people was the right thing to do.
<Third person omniscient>
But only time would tell....
