The challenges of being transgender and over 60

[iKate]

The challenges of being transgender and over 60
http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-34454576
11 October 2015 From the section Magazine

Transgender people and the issues that affect them have never been more visible. But life can be difficult for over-60s who transition gender, writes Cat McShane. Teraina Hird was 67 when she transitioned. She did so privately in Thailand after being told she'd need to wait 18 months just for her first NHS appointment.

It was a daunting process. "If you're 25, you've got your whole life in front of you, but at 67 do you want to spend three years in transition?" she says.

But Teraina, now 72, was sure of her decision and went ahead: "I felt I couldn't live with my body not matching my brain gender."

Referrals to the UK's seven gender identity clinics is growing by 20% each year, and the NHS is struggling to keep up with demand.

[...]

[iKate]

There is a lot of emphasis being placed on childhood and teen transition these days that sometimes I feel the more senior among us are left in the shadows. Certainly, Caitlyn Jenner has put a spotlight on older transitioners but she is often derided by many, with her age being one of the reasons. In many ways when you not only have advanced age, but also a whole life behind you, often with wife (or husband) and kids, transitioning while older can be a different ball game.  Remarkably, there is also some hate within the community against older transitioners, for I don't know what reason. Usually it centers around them living successful lives as men then transitioning to womanhod. I don't like that one bit, partly because I had one of those lives. It just happened that I did not really feel I could transition until it became inevitable. And that is what a lot of older transitioners face.

I accept everyone and anyone no matter their reason, age, gender, religion, nationality etc. They are all beautiful people who suffer from the same issue I do - that my body did not match my inner identity.

[TG CLare]

I began my transition when I was 58. Apparently, so I hear, only 3% of trans people do it at 60 or beyond. I can understand why because we have made lives for us and our families and it's harder for people to accept they knew us as "John" for many years and now we want to be "Jane".

My family claimed they were supportive but I suspected and learned they weren't. They act nice to my face but not behind my back. Quite typical apparently.

I don't have children, just didn't have the desire to, neither did my late wife.

The people who know ask me why now? My answer was I could no longer keep my female side hidden and under control any longer. It was tearing me in half so I needed to choose.

Acceptance has been variable. Some seem ok with it, others have abandoned me and unfortunately they are in the majority. I'm still the same person inside, just a different wrapper on the outside.

When my wife developed cancer the same thing happened. People stopped calling or visiting even us when invited. It's not contagious same as being trans isn't but people run the other way.

Given what I know and where I am, no way I'd ever go back to the person I used to be.

Love,
Clare