MtF SRS, vaginal tightness a permanent thing?

[Wynnflaeth64]

Hi everyone

I have a question regarding tightness during dilation. I had SRS with Dr Chettawut more than a month ago but I really suppose this question applies to all MtF surgeries. I'm currently dilating twice a day, which works perfectly fine. I'm not losing any depth or having any difficulties maintaining girth. However, when I start dilation with the smallest size, I find things to be really tight girth-wise. This lets off after I've inserted the first dilator, but I was wondering if this would always be an issue. Is this because I'm so fresh out of surgery? Or is it just what happens between dilations? I was wondering about it because eventually one works down to a minimal dilation regimen, and I would assume it wouldn't be pleasant to have such tightness during intercourse. We obviously don't want a looseness per se, but a tightness to this degree would be quite uncomfortable in the beginning.

Thanks in advance for everyone's input!
xx

[Rejennyrated]

I think the honest answer is that everyone is different so what happened for me may not be the case for you.

In my case I found that after about two years any shrinkage stopped and now I can go straight to the orange soul source with no trouble... but then I'm also fortunate in that I dont really need to dliate at all - i've gone in some cases months and others years without dilating and when I come back its still all there... It seems like the 1980's surgeons did a good job!

Other people find that they have to go on regularly and its always difficult. Given that men seem to like a tight vag maybe they are actuallly the lucky ones... So I dont know that there is a right answer to this, other than to experiment a bit with varying frequency and see what happens.

[Laura_7]

when I start dilation with the smallest size, I find things to be really tight girth-wise. This lets off after I've inserted the first dilator, but I was wondering if this would always be an issue. Is this because I'm so fresh out of surgery?

Yes, it could be.
There are pelvic muscles which might need some time to get used to it.
Quite a few people reported that it got better after a few months.


hugs

[Serenation]

I timed myself this morning, took 22 minutes to get my dilater to depth. Which is a long time but that's starting on the second biggest one. 2 months ago I was really struggling with the smallest one. I read that month 2-3 is the worst (which is where I'm at, almost month 3)

also you do have swelling inside.

[Jenna Marie]

In the beginning, that tightness is the PC muscle resisting - this is a muscle that had never before had to yield to something, and it's had a hole cut in it. Eventually, there's also the issue of tightness with the scar tissue contracting, around month 3-4. My GP recommended at about 4 months post-op that I do a little bit of scar tissue massage before each dilation (about 2-3 minutes of gently pressing with fingertips around the ring of scar tissue at the entrance, but I'd imagine this could be adapted for wherever the scars are forming, and if it hurts you're doing it too hard).

That helped pretty much right away, and I'd say by 5 months I stopped having issues with tightness unless I'd gone too long between dilations, as in skipped at least a couple of sessions. I assume that was the PC muscle tightening up again. I never had much trouble getting to depth, though - it usually took a couple minutes at most to get everything to loosen up. 

The nice thing is that we can squeeze that PC muscle on purpose, and it's the same muscle group that cis women use to bear down on a penis with their vagina. I hear guys like that.

[SorchaC]

Hi Wynnflaeth64,

I have encountered this through all my dilations. Being just over 4 months and still noticing I'd say that it's just something natural. I can get number 4 in easily and it even falls out if I'm not careful but number 1 still offers slight resistance some days more than others.

I am sure it will get used to it's new dimensions in time.

Hugs

Sorcha 

[Dena]

I pretty much agree with Jenny in than it is possible for me to go a long time without dilation and return to the standard size dilator. I only have one that was purchased at a dirty book store and it has always fit. If I am bad and go for a while without dilation, it will be tight and insertion will take longer.

What is important to understand is attention to early dilation is very important. If you neglect that, you may have size issues. After a few years, dilation is no longer as important but you may need to be stretched out before a sexual encounter so it's best to follow the doctors orders long term. Sexual activity counts as dilation, but if your partner is small, you should still consider dilation from time to time.

[januarysunshine]

Early on, frequent and proper dilation is hugely important to how you'll turn out in the long term.
Back in the day, Dr Menard had a frequent schedule...multiple times a day after the packing is removed. After a month, it lessens enough that you can return to work and do it whwerever you can a couple of times during the day, and at night. Over time, once a month works fine.....its just establishing depth/width early on...the muscles learn and adapt (muscle memory).
I was great until this husband who constantly withheld sex as a punishment(passive aggressive). I didnt dilate and just depended on him whenever he could manage it. Plus he was way smaller than my dilator, so i knew thered be vaginal shrinkage. Ive been terrible about dilating since he split but im working my way back to a more frequent program. Im definitely tighter than before...as in shrunken up, and my grasp reflex isnt as strong ...basically my once finely tuned vag is all shriveled and weak... Dont let this happen to you!

[Laura_7]

I was great until this husband who constantly withheld sex as a punishment(passive aggressive). I didnt dilate and just depended on him whenever he could manage it. Plus he was way smaller than my dilator, so i knew thered be vaginal shrinkage. Ive been terrible about dilating since he split but im working my way back to a more frequent program. Im definitely tighter than before...as in shrunken up, and my grasp reflex isnt as strong ...basically my once finely tuned vag is all shriveled and weak... Dont let this happen to you!

Well you could try to dilate with an estrogen cream for a while... and the grasp reflex can be trained, cis women use a jade egg for exmple for some time...
well at your own risk.. use enough lube...

[BellaSwan]

I've been post op for several years now. If I'm having sex regularly (several times a week) I'm fine without dilation at all. If not, I tighten up again. That being said, sex and dilation are very different. One is a fun thing you want, the other is a chore with something harder than rock. My vagina responds differently to the two.

[Debra]

For me I only dilate once a week and probably have sex once or twice a week on top of that. I still go thru the blue, to green to orange . If I go straight to orange, it does hurt.

But I think if I dilated 2x a week I may be able to skip green at least.

But....aint nobody got time for dat!

[OCAnne]

Hello everyone, orange dilator only every 1-2 days.  I only own the 'big one'. Feels a lot like sex when initially penetrated. A little tight at first but no pain.  Have good control of pelvic muscles, so I am told by partners. Can launch dilator at will.
Vaginal tightness appears consistent.  Can take 2 or 3? fingers during foreplay.  Not sure about self lubrication.  I use coconut oil for dilatation and insert vaginal cream 3 times a week.  Sometimes skip this step if sexual intercourse is expected.
Do worry if I will become a little too loose.  (Edit: Vagina...Ok maybe willingness as well)
Thank you,
Anne