Telling my parents I'm trans help

[Kaden]

For a few months I've know I'm transgender (MtoF) I've told some close friends that I knew would be ok with it. But I've started to get depressed because of my parents. They are hardcore Christians. And I don't think they would accept me. I'm 14 years old so it still rely on them heavily. So any advice on telling them in a way they might be ok with it?

[Isabelle]

There's lots of different kinds of Christian. Perhaps you can frame it in a way that isn't too challenging to their belief system? Do a little research on whatever church they attend, and look at their attitudes toward gender, then try to find bable passages that preach tolerance toward others. Stress the medical nature of the condition, that this is just something that happens to people, and that their god has seen fit to "bless" humans with the knowledge to treat it.
If you know what denomination they are, I'm happy to try to help you with ways to explain it in a way that fits their world view
I don't believe in gods but, I've read a lot of different texts written by people who do. The challenge you face is the nature of all religion is denial of evidence that doesn't support existing belief. This is a really useful thing to know when you're trying to get someone with beliefs to agree with you, as long as you frame it in a way that strengthens that their belief is correct, they'll be on your side.
They may turn out to be totally supportive of you, so don't build it up in your mind just yet

[Laura_7]

This could help you:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,197598.msg1757491.html#msg1757491


hello and welcome 


*hugs*

[Isabelle]

Also, remember that even if they don't agree with you, in the end everything will be ok. It might seem scary right now to upset your parents but, in a few short years, they won't be as important in your life as they are now. They'll always be your parents, and you can always love them, even if they don't understand you. Keep in mind that, in the western world, the United States (im assuming you're in the US) is the odd one out when it comes to religion. Most of the English speaking world doesn't care that much, and there's a whole world out there for you to discover and travel and find your happiness in  

[suzifrommd]

For a few months I've know I'm transgender (MtoF) I've told some close friends that I knew would be ok with it. But I've started to get depressed because of my parents. They are hardcore Christians. And I don't think they would accept me. I'm 14 years old so it still rely on them heavily. So any advice on telling them in a way they might be ok with it?

Hi Kaden. Welcome to Susan's. 

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You may find you have to educate your parents. Make sure they know:
* You didn't choose to be trans.
* It's not going to go away on its own and there is no way to "cure" it.
* It is serious. Anxiety and depression are common among those who ignore it.
* Transgender people are perfectly normal in all ways. It doesn't mean you're evil or crazy.

There is nothing unchristian about being trans. You are a child of God and deserve to be treated as such. God made you the way so it is OK to be you. Don't assume your parents are going to be unsupportive.

If they do not support you, it may help to find allies among relatives, family friends, or perhaps someone at school. And, of course, we're always here if you need us.

[Kaden]

I'm going to try and find a good time to tell my mom today. I think my mom would take it better than my dad.

[SilverWing]

Just a thought - if you've already picked out a name, you might want to wait a bit to mention it. I don't know how your parents are, but mine flipped out because I "rejected the name they gave me".

Good luck, and hope they don't give you too much trouble!

[CaptainxTatsuo]

Yea it's good to have your ducks in a row so to speak
before doing this. I know you can do it and the fact that you
making sure to reach out before doing so is very wise.
I would figure some things out and then sit em down and lay it out.
Things to remember it's not a kwik mart, so note that this is a
process for your parents to compute and it takes at least a week
if not more; before it sinks into their minds. If you need anything do
not hesitate to ask!

[Nattiedoll]

Hi Kaden,

I hope everything had been well for you. I think it's a better idea to tell your mom first. If you aren't comfortable telling them yet, you should just have a different talk and ask her her opinions about LGBT topics to see where her heads at. Let that conversation settle then tell her a few days later or a week whatever you are comfortable with.

[stephaniec]

good luck