Optical center trouble

[PsychedelicSage]

I'm a transgender girl and I went to get an eye exam and new glasses today at the optical center.

After my exam I was looking at the women's glasses, but a salesperson literally ran up to me and told me I was looking in the women's section and tried to point me to the men's section. Which surprised me for a second, because I'm a little bit passable.

I politely told her that I knew where I was looking and that I was fine where I was.

But she kept calling me sir and just said, "No you're not fine where you are, come with me to the men's section." I politely refused. After that, she practically dragged me to the men's section and forced a bunch of men's glasses into my hands. She refused to let me look in the women's section, even though women's glasses are often more expensive than men's and I would have been giving her more money..

Whenever I tried to go back to the women's section she just said no and forced more men's glasses into my hands. I politely told her that I did not want to try them on, but she kept aggressively insisting that I do.

I was with my dad in the optical center and he would have gotten really angry if I made a scene. He didn't care enough to defend me at all. He has a really really bad temper and gets embarrassed easily, so he would have gotten beyond angry if I even thought about making a scene. He was really upset when I came out as transgender to him so I really didn't want to give him another thing to be upset about. He's been through too much already.

So I ended up just taking my eye prescription and getting this really ugly masculine pair of glasses because the salesperson wouldn't let me go near the women's glasses. But I went and bought a really cute pair of glasses online for $68, and that's including 2 day UPS shipping. I got these!:




I am NEVER going to a For Eyes clinic (not only the certain one this happened at, I'm never going to any For Eyes clinic anywhere) ever again. They just lost a customer for life.

This is honestly inexcusable.. I buy women's clothing (including underwear) all the time from all kinds of different stores, and I have NEVER had an employee treat me like the one at For Eyes did, all over glasses.

UPDATE: I have sent a complaint to For Eyes and am awaiting a response.

[ChiGirl]

Terrible sales person.  After the first time you said you didn't need to be redirected, they should've helped you find what you wanted.  Horrible person and horrible salesperson.

[rachel89]

Where was this? Did you speak to the manager or complain to corporate about your treatment? I don't think there is a "For Eyes" store where I live but I don't think I will ever go there if there is. Sorry about the treatment you got from the people in the store, maybe the salesperson was blind to the fact that your a woman
Hugs,
Rachel

[PsychedelicSage]

Where was this? Did you speak to the manager or complain to corporate about your treatment? I don't think there is a "For Eyes" store where I live but I don't think I will ever go there if there is. Sorry about the treatment you got from the people in the store, maybe the salesperson was blind to the fact that your a woman
Hugs,
Rachel

Thanks for the support c:

This was in Bloomingdale, Illinois, a few miles away from Chicago.
I believe that salesperson WAS a manager, that's the messed up part..

Yes I've complained to corporate. I showed them the link to the ->-bleeped-<- post and told them they're losing hundreds of thousands of dollars of business every second that post is up, and that it is going to stay up if they don't send me a heartfelt apology and find some way to make it up to me.

I'm still awaiting a response. But I don't expect one so quickly, I only sent them the complaint at like 2am this morning and they're probably having their lawyers look at it to see if I can press charges lol.

[ChiGirl]

Bloomingdale? That's not far from me and I think I know where that store is.  I'll be taking my business somewhere else as well.

[Eva Marie]

This sort of treatment of a customer is inexcusable. She should have helped you select whatever pair of glasses you wanted after you corrected her the first time. You should contact their headquarters with a written letter and explain what happened and explain that they lost you as a customer.  At the very least the company needs to train employees about sensitivity and if they don't know what's happening in their stores they won't do that.

[suzifrommd]

For a practical matter, I bet there are dozens of opticians in your area. No reason to go to one that treats you poorly.

Is it possible your dad made contact with the place and asked them to keep you from buying the women's frames?

[awilliams1701]

I was wondering what was going to happen to me the last time I went because it was the first time presenting. The eye doctor herself was wearing a headdress (which is not something I'm used to seeing in person) and she didn't give me any trouble at all nor did any of the employees. Granted contacts are gender neutral. I'm more than happy to go back when the time comes again.

[PsychedelicSage]

Yeah, there's an optical center at my work, actually! If I need to get another eye exam that badly, I'll just go there.
It happens to be a company that's very transgender and LGBT friendly. I actually have a manager who's openly gay and everyone loves him lol c:

No, not at all. I made the appointment at the optical center myself.

And even if my dad DID call the place and tell them to not let me pick out women's glasses, I'm an adult and it's my choice what glasses I get, he has no say in it. And if he did do that, him telling the optical center to not let me pick out women's glasses still would not let them stop me from getting them, because I'm an adult.
If I picked out women's glasses and he refused to pay for them, I would just pay for them.

[traci_k]

Due to my wife's resistance I'm still not transitioning, but with glasses there is a compromise - Unisex frames. Last time I got a pair similar to what I had been wearing but in a cute tortoise shell style.  Not completely male - not completely female, a nice compromise.

But you are correct, YOU should have been able to make the selection YOU wanted.

Hugs,

[Katiepie]

After that first stint of trying to get you to the men's wear, i would have asked for my prescription, and told them I would go somewhere else for my frames. They have no business in "telling" you what to wear, or where to go. Including in the aggressive nature that they were pulling, well ripping you away from the female section, and gendering you completely wrong.
I'm sorry this has happened to you.
I know when I get employed into the field (interview next week) at a different company but optical center none the less, I would treat everyone with respect and let them have a choice of what and where, but also guide on something that would be more fitting for them.

By the way, I hope this got resolved and they had apologized on the behalf of their employee.

Kate <3