I get ya. I like my long hair. I feel vulnerable and feminized when I cut my hair short. I don't seem to pass better either way. If I shave my head to bald or fuzzy-short, I pass less and men think that I'm a man-hating lesbian and won't talk to me, and lesbians think the same thing and try to hook up with me. Not that I dislike lesbians, but I'm not interested in entering a woman-centric subculture, I can't relate to it.
Jessie's advice is good. No bangs, little sideburns. I dunno about the middle part. Mine passes best when slicked back straight from my brow (no part) and tied back at the nape of my neck. Guys tie their pony/pigtails back there, girls usually start them at the back of the head.
You wanna slick down any little fringy fuzzy fine hairs. They soften the edge of your face and have a feminizing effect. You may find, if you're like me, that if you slick back your hair hard, you have a 'male' hairline that is hidden by baby-fine hairs (at the coronal suture of your skull) that never grow long. If you shave 'em off or pull them out the effect is kinda profound.