Quote from: Sydney_NYC on November 07, 2015, 06:54:44 PM
So on Thursday my wife and I joined a 24 Hour Fitness® Gym down the street from us. My ID has the correct name and gender so the fact I'm transgender is not even on anyone's radar even though I'm pre-op. We were showed around the facility and we even viewed the pool. To get to the pool you have to go through either the women's or men's locker rooms. So my wife and I went through the women's while the guy that was showing us around went through the men's and we met on the other side. So no issues there. I did notice in the women's locker room there are no privacy stalls, but I'm so small with a tuck that with just panties no one can tell, but I don't think I will be taking a shower there. I don't mind that since we live less that a 1/2 mile from the place. In NJ there are state laws the disallow discrimination based on gender identity with accommodations. So I don't see a need to out myself to them, or do I?
I was curious what other trans experiences that people here have had with 24 Hour Fitness centers. I did check there policies and they do state that they don't discriminate against sex and sexual orientation, but gender identity isn't mentioned anywhere. I'm aware that Planet Fitness does have a great policy, but they are 20 minutes away and they don't have classes like Yoga that 24 Hour Fitness does.
Today my wife and I worked out there and I had zero issues with the women's locker room. I came already dressed in yoga pants and top, so just put my jacket, purse and bag with street clothes in the locker and we worked out. After we worked out I changes clothes down to underwear and put on street clothes because my wife wanted to stop by a store on the way home. No one could see anything the way I did it and I was tucked, so nothing visible at all. So I don't think I'm going to have any issues. I'm not ever going to strip down enough for anyone to see anything, so there shouldn't be any drama.
In a way I feel guilty about being stealth about this, but should I? Has anyone have a similar experience?
First of all, congrats on having the courage to do this and congrats on your success with this!^^
Should you feel guilty? Well, no, I don't think so. I think its normal, human, and understandable if you genuinely do feel this way. Its like your inner self is trying to come to terms with this new concept of
transition that was once a foreign idea to you, I'm sure. So I think this guilt is all part of that process of becoming your true self. So try not to be so hard on yourself, ok? =) Give your mind, body, and soul all the time it needs to adjust.
I posted a similar thread about going stealth. More specifically it was about relocating once I officially start living as a man, along with all the legal and medical transitioning that will entail. I am already headed in that direction. I have already decided on a name and prefer to go by that instead of my assigned name at birth. And I prefer people to address me in male pronouns. I am getting the right therapy for GID and dysphoria. Eventually my therapist will produce a letter of recommendation for HRT and that's when things will really get hot in the pot, so to speak!
The closest thing I did to what you described here with the gym, was that I actually got the courage to waltz confidently right into the men's fitting room in a Walmart to try on some new clothes. I was dropped off there by my pops. Its embarrassing to admit, but I was too afraid of what his reaction would be if I told him I did not try on any of the clothes he took me to get that I need(and still do) so badly. Fear of that took over the fear I had once I saw that the fitting rooms were, of course, gender-based, much to my discretion.
I went in there knowing I would not have a choice when faced with a controlling and misunderstanding father.
Luckily, I was the only one in there. And thankfully they are a collection of single-stalled rooms for better privacy. I did not just want to go in men's because I identify with men more than women. But also cause I freakin' look more like a man than I do a woman about 58% of the time if not a little more, even though I am not even on any T yet. My therapist outright told me that I at least look like a boy. I honestly was a bit taken back by his blunt comment because I want to look like a
man not a boy. But the way I see it, I rather look like a teenage boy than a grown woman.
One mtf here said that one of the qualms she had about going stealth is that you run the risk of having little to no social life. I am honestly prepared for such an existence, sadly, if it means my happiness. What's the point in having lots of friends if you are not happy about that? Our mentality shapes our reality.
Good luck with your transition and good job with it so far! =)
~Nixy~
