Does anyone else just get really frustrated by their voice?

[RachelsMantra]

For the most part I feel good about the way I look but I really do not like my voice and feel like it will never sound female. I practice quite a bit but I can't help but feel like I'll never make enough progress to get my voice to where I want it. Hearing other trans girls with beautiful femme voices really triggers my dysphoria and makes me really jealous.

How long did it take for you to be happy with your voice? For those like me that started with a deep voice, how much progress have you made? How much did you practice?

[Elsa Delyth]

In that other thread, about passing privilege, it was said that 80% of passing was voice, so I looked up a regime and started practicing right away, lol.

I thought that I sounded phony and awful, but I recorded it, and thought that it sounded a lot better in playback than in my head, and sounded somewhat like my sister at points.

I think that I'm more confident that I will be able to pull off a decent sounding voice, than a convincing look, lol. Hoping that voice makes all of the difference, and I'll put a lot of effort into that.   

[Anna33]

Working on it. I have an app called Eva MTF for the iphone which I found quite insightful

[Emjay]

I too, am working on it. 

I absolutely *hate* my voice, to the point where I won't talk a lot of times and just smile and nod yes or no to answer questions instead.  The other day my wife said that I'm going to have to start using my voice or people are going to think I'm being a mega-bitch.  She's right of course so I practice every chance I get but it sounds fake to me.  I'll have to try recording it again, I did that once before and it was ok I guess.  While it's not out of the question for me, I'm not big on surgery, I've got enough of those to plan for already.

I'll have to give the Eva app a look again, I was going to try it but it wasn't available for Android when I first tried to get it. 

[iKate]

I felt that training wasn't working for me so I had surgery.  I have exactly zero regrets.

It is very true that voice is a major factor in passing. I have no problems passing at all now.

If you can train, great. If not, there area few surgical options and some are minimally invasive.

[Anna33]

Ikate do you have any audio sample of your voice that i could listen?


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[iKate]

Rainbow passage, about 2 months:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1yb4AnA3CJM

Free talking about 3 months post op:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1ZqDvZL8uQR

My (horrible) attempt at singing a few days ago. But my consolation is that I couldn't sing very well pre op anyway:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0Awgskkknbo

I'm about 4.5 months post op now and I sound even better. I can make a new recording soon.

This is what I used to sound like:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1ZS7zGTO6IM

[Lagertha]

I think Yeson should pay you and use your pre-op/post-op results for their advertising 

[iKate]

I think Yeson should pay you and use your pre-op/post-op results for their advertising 

Hahahaha. I don't think I would want that... Besides Jenny is already doing a fantastic job!

[Dena]

The voice section has more results and people who saw different surgeons. As for me, my voice was so low it couldn't reached the feminine range so I walked around for years in a dress sounding like a man. Post surgical, I am in the lower end of the feminine range (voice still isn't fully healed) but at least the pitch isn't an issue any more.

[Emjay]

Rainbow passage, about 2 months:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1yb4AnA3CJM

Free talking about 3 months post op:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1ZqDvZL8uQR

My (horrible) attempt at singing a few days ago. But my consolation is that I couldn't sing very well pre op anyway:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0Awgskkknbo

I'm about 4.5 months post op now and I sound even better. I can make a new recording soon.

This is what I used to sound like:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1ZS7zGTO6IM

Ok, that's pretty incredible...  You sound great!

Maybe I need to look into surgery, what method did you have done?  I went to a voice clinic awhile back and they wanted to do something where they used thread to bind my vocal cords?  Sorry, it's been awhile and I still really was only interested in training so I didn't pay as close attention as I should have.  They didn't want to even start voice therapy unless I had the surgery so I moved on at the time.

[Lagertha]

I went to a voice clinic awhile back and they wanted to do something where they used thread to bind my vocal cords?

That's the same method (it's called glottoplasty), and is today pretty much used worldwide for treating some vocal-cord related conditions (androphonia being just one of them). You can find at least a few ENT doctors in every larger city, who are performing it on a regular basis. More and more are starting to smell easy money that transwomen are willing to pay, and they started advertising it as a "voice feminization surgery" (and raising prices, like 400% of what was the original price for non trans patients)

[Dena]

The process involves damaging the parts of the cord that need to heal together as one and tying the together while they heal. The process of damaging the cords may differ and the tie material can be different but the net effect is the same. I went with Dr Haben who used laser and dissolvable cord. Yeson uses permanent cord and a custom designed knife. There are other surgeons as well but I am not familiar with their procedure.

[Emjay]

The process involves damaging the parts of the cord that need to heal together as one and tying the together while they heal. The process of damaging the cords may differ and the tie material can be different but the net effect is the same. I went with Dr Haben who used laser and dissolvable cord. Yeson uses permanent cord and a custom designed knife. There are other surgeons as well but I am not familiar with their procedure.

That's it...... I remember now.  They did say they used a laser to cut the vocal cords and then bound them afterward.  So, once it's healed the cord is no longer necessary in some cases?  One of the reasons I kind of shied away from surgery is that I heard a horror story about the cord breaking and the whole thing having to be repeated.  If that's not the case then it's definitely worth looking into again.

[RobynD]

I'm not sure if i will ever be satisfied with mine., though i am making progress. My spouse and others tell me i sound feminine but I just don't hear it in myself. I sound softer with way less resonance but not where i want to be. Everything i have done is self taught using YouTube tips etc. I have not done any coaching, although i practice with my family members constantly.

[RachelsMantra]

I take inspiration from trans women with deep voices who still rock their femininity. Voice surgery is not an option for me financially speaking for years and years so there's not much point in me thinking about that right now. By the time I get enough money for vocal surgery I will hopefully have done enough vocal training as to make it unnecessary. I can get my voice pitch into the female range I just need to work on making it sound natural and sustaining it in conversation.

[iKate]

Ok, that's pretty incredible...  You sound great!

Maybe I need to look into surgery, what method did you have done?  I went to a voice clinic awhile back and they wanted to do something where they used thread to bind my vocal cords?  Sorry, it's been awhile and I still really was only interested in training so I didn't pay as close attention as I should have.  They didn't want to even start voice therapy unless I had the surgery so I moved on at the time.

I did a glottoplasty with Dr Kim at Yeson in Korea. There are other surgeons who do it too, some in combination with other procedures.

Check out the voice forum. There's a wealth of info there. It may be more doable than you think.

Trust me, my quality of life post VFS has improved very dramatically. I'm not saying the surgery is magic but it can help a lot.

[iKate]

I take inspiration from trans women with deep voices who still rock their femininity. Voice surgery is not an option for me financially speaking for years and years so there's not much point in me thinking about that right now. By the time I get enough money for vocal surgery I will hopefully have done enough vocal training as to make it unnecessary. I can get my voice pitch into the female range I just need to work on making it sound natural and sustaining it in conversation.

Honestly I think some of them can do a deep voice and be very feminine with it. Jenny Boylan for example. She definitely seems Trans but she doesn't seem masculine either. She has that aura of a proud and confident Trans woman. She seems very proud of who she is too.

[Dena]

That's it...... I remember now.  They did say they used a laser to cut the vocal cords and then bound them afterward.  So, once it's healed the cord is no longer necessary in some cases?  One of the reasons I kind of shied away from surgery is that I heard a horror story about the cord breaking and the whole thing having to be repeated.  If that's not the case then it's definitely worth looking into again.

My surgery involved a cord that dissolved and I think it came apart about a month and a half ago. If anything, the pitch my voice is improving after to cord was gone.

[Lagertha]

Voice surgery is not an option for me financially speaking for years and years so there's not much point in me thinking about that right now.

Just for info... Realistic price for glottoplasty procedure is between 1500-2000€ in Europe, and between $2000-3000 in US. There are more than 100 ENT doctors in Europe alone, who did the training and do this procedure on a regular basis. The number in US must be about similar. So there aren't just two or three doctors who do this. But there are two doctors who promote themselves very well, and thanks to youtube and websites like this, they are known in the online trans "community". Which is why they are able to charge $7,000 or $8,000, because there are people who are willing to pay them. It's a simple, very straightforward procedure, and if you go to your nearest city and nearest ENT doctor who specializes in phonosurgery, it's likely he/she had done hundreds of this surgeries, or they can give you a contact to their colleague who had done so.