Nobody would miss me if I was gone

[Elis]

I seem to be lying to myself when I say life would get better. Nobody cares that I'm on T. There's no encouraging words of support. Just the same old crap from the same old people. I thought my ex would care but she doesn't. And I s/h again. Just a rant.

[suzifrommd]

Hang in there. One of the frustrations of transition - it's a big deal to us, but not to anyone else.

I feel a lot the way you do - that I don't seem to mean anything to anyone. At such times it helps me to focus on what I can give other people. I hope this helps.

Hugs.

[Dena]

I understand how you feel because at times I was pretty much as alone as you were. I would talk to my mom on the phone once every couple of weeks and I would talk to my therapist. I had no friends and nobody to share my thoughts with. You have to remember that you are doing this for yourself and you can build a new life. After my surgery, I met my roommate who I shared many adventures with. I went to places I never thought I would go, didn't things I never knew about and met people I would have never found on my own. The future can hold many surprises that you never expected and all you have to do is get there so you can live it. You may not think you would be missed now but you may be missing out on a bright and happy future.

[Mariah]

Elis, I know it can be hard because of those around us who don't support us. I wish I could say hormones, or GRS, or any other surgery any of us may need were a magic fix, but they are not. Some people will react in ways that are not supportive. We can only hope in time that they come around. Elis it does get better, but sometimes it just takes time. The thing is no one understands me better than those friends that I have gained post transition. Anyway, hang in there. It's always good to rant sometimes we just need to get things out and that is a good thing. Big hugs
Mariah

[janetcgtv]

remember we will miss you so please don't do anything to harm yourself. you have a lot of friends here who understand want you are going thru. when things are going bad or good I pray to the Great Spirit who helps me out Always ask for advice here. And tell everyone how you are doing.

Please take care,

Janet

[FriendsCallMeChris]

Hey Elis,

Congratulations on starting T! Yeah, you'd be missed. Our brotherhood is too small to lose even one of us.  You're making your own ripple in the world.  Sooner or later it will cross with another ripple and then we'll all be less alone.

Just remember, you've got a very strong and determined contingent who are a lot like you who have your back.  We might only connect on this forum, but we're still connecting.  And we all need that connection.  Glad to have yours!

[Ms Grace]

I seem to be lying to myself when I say life would get better. Nobody cares that I'm on T. There's no encouraging words of support. Just the same old crap from the same old people. I thought my ex would care but she doesn't. And I s/h again. Just a rant.

Just because they don't know how to support you through transition doesn't mean they don't care for you. I know approval and tacit support from those we are close to can seem very important in this process, especially because it is so huge for us - but they have their own lives and their own issues as well. You're doing this for yourself (right?), not other people.

[Denise]

Maybe I'm misreading your post, I read that as people are ignoring you and that you still have the same issues as you always have had with people.  (If I misinterpreted your post, ignore what follows.)

Is it possible that the people around you are either unsure/embarrassed/uncomfortable/... to talk to you about your transition? 

Example: a very good friend of mine's daughter came down with cancer all through out her body.  It was a very serious situation (all is good now, 100% remission) but other than the initial "OMG, I hope all is okay" I didn't know what to say.  We would go golfing and hang out, and the topic never came up.  I assume now that the cancer was always on his mind every day.  I felt bad because I didn't know how to talk to him about it.

Maybe a simple "would you like to talk about this?" might spark some conversation with your circle.  Support and encouragement comes from understanding.  It's tough to give encouragement on something you know nothing about.  Educate them.

Head up, shoulders straight, positive mental attitude and smile.

[Rachel]

You would be missed.

It is good to let out how you feel. I get involved and volunteer in the community and I have meet a lot of people. It feels really good help someone else.

I am totally out at work and everyone treats me the same as before. It would be easy for me to say they do not care. Instead I think they are trying to behave like nothing happened when it changes a lot in the dynamics of relationships. Very few people have had the experience in dealing with someone that is in transition. I talk about it and help them process their feelings. After all you do not transition in a void; they are in transition too. 

[Tristyn]

I don't even think I'll even find out whether anyone else cares about me being on T cause I'm so messed up that no endocrinologist would wanna risk me as their patient. Shoot, at least you on T. I swear I might just give up too. What's the point in going on with this garbage, right?

[Elis]

Thanks for all your replies, they really helped. I guess this feeling won't last forever and I have to stick it out.

[haeden]

Hey things will get better I know it's tough right now but they will get better. Just look at all the raising trans people! I'm sure they had some tough days just like you but they knew they had to continue on for themselves not anyone else. You have to keep going so you can reach your happy place too!

[haeden]

I don't even think I'll even find out whether anyone else cares about me being on T cause I'm so messed up that no endocrinologist would wanna risk me as their patient. Shoot, at least you on T. I swear I might just give up too. What's the point in going on with this garbage, right?

Come one Phoenix we talked about this! The reason to keep going on is so that you can be the person you know you are! You are a man named Phoenix and one day the world will come to know this truth as well you guys just have to keep your head up