HRT - how long before people noticed?

[NerissaGrace]

I plan to transition to full time next year. I am debating when to begin HRT. On the one hand, I've read from others that you should complete a lot of hair removal prior to beginning, otherwise the beard shadow and the feminized face are incongruous at the very least. I have completed one round of beard (and partial body) clearing at E3K. Have sessions scheduled for end of year and Feb. already, will likely keep going back every 6-8 weeks. From what I have read here it sounds like at least 4 clearings before the obvious beard shadow is gone, but perhaps some of you have had different experiences.

There are other considerations re starting HRT, however:

- Impact of start date for HRT on schedule for FFS and breast augmentation
- Achieving my weight loss goals (<20 BMI) before starting HRT

I mention all of this because I'd like to hear from others how long you were on HRT before other people noticed that your face and/or body was changing. This will have an impact on when I come out at work, start living full time and other things. I know it can vary wildly by individual, but some experiences from others would be really helpful.

[Eva Marie]

I was on low dose HRT for about 4 years before I began my transition, and then I was on a transitioning dose of HRT for about a year. During that year I had done laser hair removal.

By the end of that year I was still presenting male but I had small breasts that I hid with baggy shirts, and I had markedly different skin - and no one said anything or acted differently around me. My boss later told me that he had noticed my smooth face but thought nothing of it. It was at the end of that year that I began experiencing male fails in public.

When that year was up I did my name & gender change and waltzed into work wearing heels - and then they noticed the changes

[RavenL]

It really depends honesty, HRT effects everyone differently. less then a month I'm already seeing my face change and people notice. Not a problem for me since I'm already full time.

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[Lady Smith]

I transitioned 25 years ago at age 38 and I was prescribed Premarin and Spiro.  I personally wouldn't recommend Premarin as it eventually damaged my liver and kidneys, BUT that aside it was as if my body welcomed HRT and soaked it up like a sponge during those first few months.  My skin softened and became more fine, my hair improved and seemed to have much more body.  I'd been a heavy truck mechanic so I was lean and muscular to start with.  Muscle dropped away very quickly and I noticed that my body and face was rounding out as a feminine layer of fat began to develop under my skin.  For me breasts were slow to develop and it took a good year before I could really notice much happening.  They certainly were sore and tender though.
After only two months people who knew me and I hadn't come out to started to look at me with puzzled expressions on their faces due to the changes to my face and skin.  I was waxing my face (ouch!) and wouldn't have electrolysis for another four years so when my face was newly waxed beard shadow wasn't a problem.  The one downside of waxing is becoming a hermit until facial hair growth is long enough to wax again.  Being on Spiro though regrowth was much more fine and almost colourless.  It was funny though because friends would want to touch my face because my skin was much finer and softer.

By four months I was getting male failed a lot by strangers and by six months it was happening even if I was wearing jeans and a Tee shirt and not trying very hard to come across as being female.  I did wear skirts like it was a religion during my first year or so, though once I relaxed more into being myself I would wear jeans and dress androgynous if I wanted to.

I've always been hopeless at using make up and pretty much stuck to lipstick and moisturiser and found that to be better than trying to 'paint up'.  The big thing that really did make a difference though was when I had electrolysis done and had my facial hair killed off for good.  Whenever someone I'd met for the first time was trying to figure out my gender it was the lack of any sign of hair on my face that kept the dreaded male pronouns away.  Of course there always were the ignorant pricks who would go to any lengths to mis-gender me, but like fleas, flies and cockroaches they are an unfortunate fact of life that not a lot can be done about.

FFS? - I wouldn't know anything about that as back when I transitioned that wasn't a thing trans-folk did or even knew about.  Apart from clever makeup, staying skinny, growing your own hair long and shaping your eyebrows nicely was about the extent of what you could do back then.  The biggest thing in making a good transition though is yourself.  If you believe in yourself and you know who you are you will be fine.  Don't let others define you or dictate how you should be.

[Jenna Marie]

People at work noticed facial changes in about 2 months and significant breast development and body changes by 3-4 months; however, the catch is that most of them didn't know what they were looking at. I had a bunch of people come up to me after I came out and admit they thought I was sick somehow because I looked paler and thinner and more "fragile"!

Hitting 42C at 3 months drove me to come out at work earlier than planned.

[NerissaGrace]

Wow...that is definitely a range . I really appreciate all of the insights and perspectives.

What I'm starting to recognize is that I want my transition to be this perfectly organized project plan where I can control every variable to make the process as painless and risk-free as possible. One thing that is clear from spending time here is that the universe usually has other plans.

Was there a difference between you noticed the changes in your face and when other people did?

[RavenL]

I started getting comments three weeks into HRT that my cheeks were fuller and face rounder. I could tell something was different in the mirror but couldn't put my finger on it till I was told.

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[Deborah]

People notice but unless you act insecure about it or tell everyone you're trans then it isn't an issue.

I'm pretty sure people have noticed I haven't had a haircut in a year and that Ive lost 35 pounds.  My face has changed enough that my wife's friend asked her if I was sick.  I don't get called Sir near as often anymore and get called ma'am occasionally while presenting male and making no effort.

But at work it isn't a problem and if people are making any guesses they certainly haven't told me about them.

[RobynD]

I had people initially noticing "some sort" of change in me at about month 3-4. People lately have been saying i look younger, happier etc. My hair is also a lot longer, so i am sure that contributes.

My therapist noticed big changes around month 6.

[Catherine Sarah]

Hi Nerissa,

HT will impact on your body hair, including face, by thinning it and retarding it's growth.
If you're considering FFS and BA, you should give HT at least 2+ years to do its work. I've known women to have BA then start HT only to end up with excessive breast tissue, making them look very conspicuous and odd. Same with FFS.

Other than that, my ex took about 3 weeks to notice there was something different about me once I started HT. she didn't know at the time. My pheromones, demeanour and speech patten changed so quickly, she caught on that something big had happened.

Speak to you as soon as I pluck my eyebrows.

Huggs
Catherine

[RobynD]

I think the pheromone thing is very real. It has been one of the struggles with my spouse in remaining close. I'm just not giving off all those male chemicals that she is used to. People pick up on these things and don't even realize it.

[Catherine Sarah]

You're absolutely right Robyn. That's where a lot of people come unstuck when they try to transition behind their family's back. Women, particularly are very sensitive to pheromones. I know I'm very sensitive to men's pheromones, and the right ones can really turn me on.


Speak to you as soon as I put the garbage out.

Huggs
Catherine

[RobynD]

You're absolutely right Robyn. That's where a lot of people come unstuck when they try to transition behind their family's back. Women, particularly are very sensitive to pheromones. I know I'm very sensitive to men's pheromones, and the right ones can really turn me on.


Speak to you as soon as I put the garbage out.

Huggs
Catherine

Wow Catherine! I too have noticed that at the Gym for instance, i perceive men as more attractive then ever. Likely my own chemical receptors kicking in. Which leads me to wonder if i shouldn't put on supplemental male pheromones for my wife. I won't get all male/hairy for her anymore and she misses that to some extent, I certainly could stomach putting on some sort of fragrance. I wonder if that would confuse my brain and cause dysphoria? 

Worth a try? Hugs Robyn

[NerissaGrace]

This is really helpful. What with pondering breast growth, face changing and new emotions because of HRT, I hadn't even begun to think about pheromones . I figured that I should wait at least a year for BA after starting HRT after everything I've read - have some of you noticed it took even longer to fill out?

Re FFS, I have heard different things about the importance of prior HRT. Some MDs say it is not that important, others do. My current plan is to start HRT in April after I have completed 4 rounds at E3K, since in theory the beard shadow is mostly gone then, but I know mileage varies. My thinking is that I would go full time at some point next summer. I would really like to get FFS done before the end of the year but it would be helpful to hear your views re HRT prior to FFS.

Thanks to everybody for all the responses!

[RavenL]

Wow Catherine! I too have noticed that at the Gym for instance, i perceive men as more attractive then ever. Likely my own chemical receptors kicking in. Which leads me to wonder if i shouldn't put on supplemental male pheromones for my wife. I won't get all male/hairy for her anymore and she misses that to some extent, I certainly could stomach putting on some sort of fragrance. I wonder if that would confuse my brain and cause dysphoria? 

Worth a try? Hugs Robyn

I'm pretty sure I'm giving off female pheromones now. since my cats kind of didn't know who I was for a couple days.

On the other hand I can pick up male pheromones also but can't stand them. One guy yesterday was overpowering. Also I can not stand cigarette smoke noe.

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[Catherine Sarah]

Hi Nerissa,

My thinking is that I would go full time at some point next summer. I would really like to get FFS done before the end of the year but it would be helpful to hear your views re HRT prior to FFS.

There are lots of things you can do to feminise your face before FFS. Particularly when negotiating the waiting time for HT to do its thing.

Hair colour and style, makeup, fashion, attitude are all identifiers in displaying your non verbal gender. HT will be doing its stuff, skin texture, fat redistribution which gives you the time to consider what, if anything needs to change. You may be pleasantly surprised.

Very seldom do I see the benefit of FFS to be honest. The changes are often minuscule and the costs are astronomical.

It's what's between your ears is what determines your womanhood. 

Speak to you as soon as I hang the washing out, before it rains.

Huggs
Catherine

[NerissaGrace]

Thanks Catherine. I am sure a lot of this is a self confidence issue for me. I don't know what impact hormones will have on my appearance, and you're right, other cues can make a difference.

I suppose I am somewhat fixated on FFS because of safety concerns around passing. I live near Washington DC and a local TG survey report called "Access Denied" came out a couple of weeks ago indicating that the majority of respondents had been victims of physical and/or sexual assault. I think I'm nervous because I am 6'4" and I'll still have an Adam's apple, among other male features. FFS is no guarantee that I'll never be clocked, but I feel like it would lower the percentage and thereby the risks.

I have read lots of the passing threads here and safety has only been raised as a concern in a few instances, so maybe I'm over-reacting. What has been the experience of others here?

[cindianna_jones]

I transitioned at work just before I started HRT. I'd already lost some weight and the weight loss was what changed my face, not HRT. Oh, that and a good hair style. I saw my biggest changes after GCS. Then I had some breast growth and body hair loss. Up until then, not so much.

Cindi

[RavenL]

I wouldn't worry too much about the Adams apple some women have them also. Same for height, every time I worry about mine 6"2 I end up seeing a female taller then me. As one friend says it's all how you carry yourself.

Mine thing to work on is the voice. That is the one thing that will help you pass more then anything.

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[StillAnonymous]

I began HRT about one month ago with "low-dose" Estradiol, and then "low-dose" Spiro a few days ago (in quotes because I am not sure what "low-dose" is, but I am taking my physician's word for it).  I personally have not notice any "big" changes, and I have even tracked my body measurements to be as objective as possible, but some others have noticed the change(s) despite my anonymity.  I cannot measure much with my face, and I do believe there was redistribution there.  People have told me that I look more thin, but my weight has not change.  I asked a woman where the restroom was, and she appeared very confused and had to confirm by saying "Men's restroom??"  (I do not cross-dress in public at all).  Several friends have also made comments that make me believe they may have an idea.

To be fair, though, I've never had very masculine features (including voice), and I have more recently grown out my hair again.  I am in my mid-20's, about 140 lbs. with an athletic body, and not too short at 5' 7".  I'd post a picture of me in male clothing, but I am serious about remaining anonymous for now.



Measurements are around 34-29-31, and I had what looked like slight gynecomastia before (not diagnosed), but I think it seemed that way from more muscle and thin body - I do a lot of cardio and I thoroughly enjoy an impact sport.

I think I will have to reveal myself to my friends, family, and coworkers a lot sooner than I expected.  In summary, the timeline seems to be very unpredictable, and we might not be able to recognize the changes using our own eyes.

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