Fed up

[FireWolf]

Why is it that every day seems to get worse? I could have a great day with friends, have a decent time, not have to worry about anything. The next moment I have no patience, I hate everyone and everything because people either A) are too uptight about their religion, B) are to ignorant about these subjects (being trans, or even dealing with any other situation), or C) just enjoy watching people suffer. I just can't seem to get a good day in anymore. I can't afford a therapist to help in any way because I need to save if I'm to move home to my partner over the summer. Me and him have been together for almost a year, but haven't seen each other for almost two years. We make plans a lot for when I do go down, but they're only fantasies because the chances of me actually being able to move are slim to none. I was forced to move out because of my intolerable mother and brother who can't mind to keep their mouth shut about my nails being done. What's it to them if I get them done? It in no way affects them, and even after asking them not to say anything, they go ahead and say it anyways. I guess they just don't care for how I feel so, I see no reason why I shouldn't return the favor. How do people deal with this type of thing on a daily basis? This is downright ridiculous. Suicide isn't an option for me, but I do think about it and what it would be like and right now it seems like a decent idea because there isn't a solution that fixes everything. Fed up with this place right now... What to do?

[autumn08]

1. Continue towards where you want to be.
2. Accept the things you can not change.
3. Find things the make you happy on a regular basis.

Good luck. 

[Jacqueline]

I never feel I am in a place to give advice. I sometimes give suggestions. So here goes from where I sit:

1 Cry a little, or a lot and take a few naps.

2 Distract yourself with hobbies, work, music, volunteer work... journal it is a cheap way to emulate some therapy; look at yourself and collect thoughts and emotions.

3 Try to look at alternate possibilities. Think outside of the box. Don't eliminate ideas you already had. Don't eliminate unlikely options. See what you can come up with. Dream.

I am not sure where you are but perhaps there is some sort of public based therapy you can take advantage of?

4 Find things that are good short term. See if there are things that can be done to make life easier and make you smile.

Continue 1 and 2. Occasionally go back and revisit your journals and see if gives other ideas like in 3

5 Give it a month or three then try to see what plans can be plausible. Try to head in that direction

Take any ideas you like and use them. Throw away any or all that don't work for you. Try to find ways to be kind to yourself.

I wish you hope, love and acceptance.

With warmth,

Joanna