Introduction

[Nik]

Hi everyone,

My name is Nik and  I have just discovered this site. I'm posting here as I am happily married to the worlds most lovely man for 18 yrs this year. He is a cross dresser, which I discovered a couple of years into our marriage. I have embrased it and incorporated it into our sex life. However, the issue for me is that he doesn't seem to be turned on by me as a female and unless he is feminised doesn't reach orgasm. I know he loves me very much, but don't feel affirmed as a woman or feel desirable to him. I struggle with this at times..... Lately I really struggle with this.

[Laura_7]

Hello and welcome  *hugs*

Its good you are supportive.

Well you might tell him that... that you would like to be valued. After all your partner likes his female side and very likely likes your femininity too.

And you might try some roleplay.
Would you like to explore a more male role, maybe even with a strapon ?
Like being a bit dominant, telling him a bit what to do ?


many *hugs*

[Nik]

Thanks, I do do the role Reversal bit often using a strapon, which I do enjoy. It's just sometimes I want to be noticed as a woman, for him to pay attention to my body, and enjoy it, rather than me thinking that anything I wear, he is only turned on by thinking of what it would feel like to wear himself! Which I of course allow and enjoy him doing. It's not that he is inconsiderate, he very much desires and enjoys bringing me to orgasm. However, if We have sex without engaging his alter ego, he really tries, but it feels mechanical and he himself is not turned on, which is a massive turn off for me. I love him desparatly as he does me, but I want to be made love to by a man sometimes too! I'm not sure how we can reach a resolution on this. He can't help how he feels any more than I can.

[Laura_7]

Well you can feel their emotions ... if you look at them.

You might close your eyes, and use your imagination a bit.

Its possible to imagine a picture more to your liking, with closed eyes.

And try to please yourself, many women need additional stimulation.

This might take you to new heights:
http://www.menshealth.co.uk/sex/better/give-her-a-30-minute-orgasm-438481

Just give it a try, it works


hugs

[Nik]

Thanks Launa, will give this ago.

[Laura_7]

Thanks Laura, will give this ago.

Try it, it works.
Its from a pair who have their own practice.

For further reading you might have a look at their books.
Included are hints on how to get the head free, etc.


I guess you would not have expected it to be so explicit but its only natural and can enrich your life.
I'd say try to connect it also with a feeling of love  .


*hugs*

[V M]

Hi Nik 

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Here's a few quick links to help you along

Please be sure to review

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

Hugs

V M

[Nik]

Thanks

[Devlyn]

Hi Nik, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm the resident Bostonian. Glad you decided to hang out with us! See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

[Laura_7]

Thanks Launa, will give this ago.

Did you give it a try ?   


hugs

[gennee]

Hi Nik and welcome to Susan's.