What made you unhappy today? 7.0

[4A-GZE]

My coworker stole money from me. Again.

The customer handed him our tip. It was a wad of cash with a strip of green in the middle. Obviously at least one $20 bill, surrounded by some amount of ones and/or other denominations. He went behind the truck, stayed there suspiciously long, then came back around and handed me $10, keeping ten for himself. But that strip of green was, without a doubt, a twenty- there was at least $40 in that bundle, and he only gave me ten. It's less of a huge deal than the time he gave me $5 out of $100, but my god I'm mad. I just wish I could bring myself to do something about it.

[4A-GZE]

God, I spend way too much time in this thread, but everything sucks so whatever.

I really don't even know exactly what's wrong this time. I'm just sad. My ex, with whom I'm going to a festival next month, doesn't seem interested in hanging out beforehand and I'm really dying to reconnect with her. The few people I've been talking to between OkCupid and Tinder also just seem rather disinterested. Maybe it's just that I'm really needy, but it seems unfair that other people are able to have friends. I put myself out there as much as I can, and then I spend every night alone while the people I care about go out with other people and never consider inviting me.

[KathyLauren]

I don't usually have call to post in this thread, but today I found out that, after a year of waiting to see a shrink, it will be at least another year before I will get an appointment date.  It is for my second referral letter for GRS.

On the one hand, I have been waiting for this for 63 years, so what's another couple of years?  But I am not getting any younger, and each year that passes brings the grim reaper a year closer. 

I want this transition to be over.  Wa-a-a-a-ahhhh!!! [/tantrum]

[Northern Star Girl]

I don't usually have call to post in this thread, but today I found out that, after a year of waiting to see a shrink, it will be at least another year before I will get an appointment date.  It is for my second referral letter for GRS.

On the one hand, I have been waiting for this for 63 years, so what's another couple of years?  But I am not getting any younger, and each year that passes brings the grim reaper a year closer. 

I want this transition to be over.  Wa-a-a-a-ahhhh!!! [/tantrum]

@KathyLauren
Dear Kathy:   What... no shrinks available anywhere within reasonable driving distance can see you for a YEAR???   I know that you live in a rural area much as I do,  where I live there is a small clinic staffed by a Nurse  one GP Doctor .... and no Psychiatrists anywhere near.   

The situation that you described certainly does indeed warrant posting here on the "Unhappy" thread.,..
I am sincerely hoping, as you most certainly are, that you can find a way to get through the "shrink" hurtle and get an appointment sooner than in a year...     

The good news that you should be happy about is that you are passing very well and are filling out your clothes nicely...  and your face and appearance are indisputably female.

Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

[KathyLauren]

What... no shrinks available anywhere within reasonable driving distance can see you for a YEAR???

My doctor picked this one because she had the shortest waiting list.  She would be a 3.5-hour drive each way.  Argh!

The good news that you should be happy about is that you are passing very well and are filling out your clothes nicely...  and your face and appearance are indisputably female.

Thank you for saying that, Danielle!  I am starting to believe the passing part, surprising as that is.  When my hairline is hidden, I can't see a guy in the mirror any more.  As for filling out the clothes, ... hmmm ... I do fill out the midriff area all too well.  Not so much the boobs.  Still working on both.

Thanks for making me smile.

[Sephirah]

I don't usually have call to post in this thread, but today I found out that, after a year of waiting to see a shrink, it will be at least another year before I will get an appointment date.  It is for my second referral letter for GRS.

On the one hand, I have been waiting for this for 63 years, so what's another couple of years?  But I am not getting any younger, and each year that passes brings the grim reaper a year closer. 

I want this transition to be over.  Wa-a-a-a-ahhhh!!! [/tantrum]

Sweetie, you still have a huge portion of your life in front of you.

I've been watching you on the forums, for a while now. Not in a creepy stalker kind of way. But I pay attention to people, and who they are. I get feelings from people. Not so much what they say, but how they are, you know? How people conduct themselves, and the tone of the things they say to others. It tells me a lot about who someone is on the inside. Regardless of what's going on outside.

In your case... I would venture that your transition is already over, and has been for quite some time. The rest... is just a formality. Who you are, and how you are... is very clear to me. It comes across in everything you do and say. Now you just need to hang on a bit for the fleshy stuff to catch up. But it will.

*big hugs*

[Allison S]

I was told by my sister that I looked better as a male before starting hrt. She says she seems me as inbetween male and female now. I guess that's good and bad but it just got to my head like I guess I am right for thinking that I look like a freak...

My mom has been a pain the behind... She was asking me if I was sexually abused as a kid, if I ever had sex with a woman, well specifically if I penetrated a vagina... It made me very uncomfortable. She thinks a man is a penis and a woman is a vagina. She also thinks a person with a penis apparently needs to use it. She was surprised I hadn't slept with my friends... I was grossed out to say the least.

I'm trying to come to terms about transitioning taking away privacy I've always had. I understand my family is going to ask the most intrusive questions, but honestly it's much deeper than anything I can get into on here... It's super weird.

None of what she asked me was relevant. I'm trans... Because I'm trans.

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[Rachel_Christina]

I was told by my sister that I looked better as a male before starting hrt. She says she seems me as inbetween male and female now. I guess that's good and bad but it just got to my head like I guess I am right for thinking that I look like a freak...

My mom has been a pain the behind... She was asking me if I was sexually abused as a kid, if I ever had sex with a woman, well specifically if I penetrated a vagina... It made me very uncomfortable. She thinks a man is a penis and a woman is a vagina. She also thinks a person with a penis apparently needs to use it. She was surprised I hadn't slept with my friends... I was grossed out to say the least.

I'm trying to come to terms about transitioning taking away privacy I've always had. I understand my family is going to ask the most intrusive questions, but honestly it's much deeper than anything I can get into on here... It's super weird.

None of what she asked me was relevant. I'm trans... Because I'm trans.

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Transition is like a free pass to ask all of their weirdest questions in their mind
I get this too. D:

[4A-GZE]

My partner at work today was watching weird transphobic videos in the truck, and he was one of the ones I was LEAST afraid of coming out to.

I need a new job, but I don't know what I can even do. It's so stressful that I'm actually struggling to breathe correctly.

[Rachel_Christina]

It didn't exactly make me unhappy, but it did take me aback. I was shopping with a friend and ally, a cis woman I work with, and we were going to a known destination but taking a way I rarely drive. I ended up in the wrong lane, and she started giving me directions. Let me rephrase that: she started giving me directions. We haven't really known each other that long, so I took the opportunity to tell her I have a very difficult time with "back seat driving." Her response was to tell me, "Don't act like a man," or words to that effect.

For some people, that comment would have been a game-changer. As it was, I just replied, "But I can act like me." And that was the end of it. Some time later, we were in the store together and I made reference to her comment, jokingly telling her, "That was really cold." She got very embarrassed and tried to save face, but it was pointless. Anyway, I'm not letting it bother me, because I see it as her issues that caused it; she was just being defensive for some reason. But I think it could bother me, if I let it.

On a related subject: I've been noticing recently that when people react to my appearance (presenting female, not passing), it has started to seem weird to me. I feel perfectly normal. What's wrong with them? 

I honestly can't see why you didn't just here her out with the directions especially when you didn't know the area very well. Maybe she did? Why else would she start giving directions, she must have felt she knew the area well enough no?

I really don't get why you had to tell her how
you have such a difficult time being a back seat driver. If you are lost you are lost and that's it. You kinda have to take directions from someone or something no?

[Ann W]

I honestly can't see why you didn't just here her out with the directions especially when you didn't know the area very well. Maybe she did? Why else would she start giving directions, she must have felt she knew the area well enough no?

I really don't get why you had to tell her how
you have such a difficult time being a back seat driver. If you are lost you are lost and that's it. You kinda have to take directions from someone or something no?

Thank you, Rachel_Christina. You've opened my eyes, but not about what you think.

[Allison S]

I just feel scammed and fooled by incidents and people in my past... I don't know. It's a funny realization to look back at another life as a trans person... It was mine, but it was really a performance of convenience. Or so I thought.

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[Rachel_Christina]

Thank you, Rachel_Christina. You've opened my eyes, but not about what you think.

Haha ok, I what way where your eyes opened?

[4A-GZE]

I had a slight panic attack today. I saw a sign for a record show and decided to stop in, but I couldn't find the entrance. I just saw the back doors and didn't know where I was supposed to go in. Turns out I was supposed to enter through the hotel next door, but my god was that stressful to figure out. I don't even know why. I was just sitting in my car almost in tears because I felt so lost and confused.

[Kymmie Lorain]

Well it was me making myself unhappy. On Friday Our explorer died on my wife at her work. So that evening She thought it was the Alternator. SO I go to work and pick up one. Change it out. cranks but won't fire. Not the Alt. So I figure the fuel pump. Having owned 7 other explorers I know a few tricks. Sat We went out again. BTW She works at a rural school 20 miles from town. I proceed to cut access holes in the floor. First not eve close. Second was a score. The I found out my fuel line release tool isn't the correct size. We call it a day.

Al the time something is bugging me the theft light flashes fast when the key is turned. I have converted it from a chipped key to a regular key and taped the chip need the receiver. So Sunday I had to work all day. SO this morning I got up and drove out with the wife.
I start working on getting the fuel line off. being a PITA. I thought let me just retape the chip and see. less than 10 min later it is running. I guess I was a darn idiot.

Kymmie

[Allison S]

... I don't know. Today's not my day. I'm spooked. I wouldn't say I'm unhappy but having a bit of a reality shock.

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[Northern Star Girl]

... I don't know. Today's not my day. I'm spooked. I wouldn't say I'm unhappy but having a bit of a reality shock.

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@Allison S
Dear Allison:
I get reality shocks from time to time but I don't let myself get "spooked" very often....  I instead move on with my day and o to my plans with all of the confidence that I can muster.   
I have gone way too far to be unhappy about my situation... no going back now...  past the point of no return.

It is still early in the day, plenty of time for things to get better for you.... coffee and chocolate help me a lot as well as spending time with my accepting friends doing something we enjoy....  gym? walks? eating? etc.

Hugs and I am trusting that your day gets better.
Danielle

[4A-GZE]

I had an extra pillow in the closet and today I found it covered in mold. Now I'm terrified that it might spread to my clothes and stuff. Obviously I threw the pillow away, but it looks like it's been that way for a while.

[4A-GZE]

I chipped a tooth yesterday. Fun.

[Colleen_definitely]

The air conditioner for the house stopped working.  Turns out there's a hole in the evaporator coil because the jerks who designed this thing set it up for failure.  When steel and copper touch each other there's a reaction that makes the steel rust.  It's why you never mix steel and copper pipes in a house.

So thanks to this, the manufacturer ensured that the coil on this system would literally crumble after about 15 years of service, which mine just did.

I hope everyone who works planned obsolescence into things breaks their toe today.