Why My Top Surgery Didn't Result in a Happy Reveal

[stephaniec]

Why My Top Surgery Didn't Result in a Happy Reveal

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/leo-caldwell/why-my-top-surgery-didnt-_b_9081774.html?utm_hp_ref=transgender

The Huffington Post/By Leo Caldwell    01/26/2016 05:13 pm ET |

"I expected that after top surgery I'd have an immediate and overwhelming relief but instead I had to ease into my new body. This is my top surgery story.

I spent the night before top surgery in a hotel with my girlfriend. I laid on her and wept. I was mourning losing a piece of myself. I thought of all the situations that my trans body may be used against me. What if I was in an accident and unconscious? What if first responders paused in their treatment when they saw my trans body? What if I were thrown into jail? What about when I needed medical care? Will my girlfriend love my new body? Will I ever find someone who can understand such a complicated, scarred body? I was scared of surgery. "