Coming out to spouse or significant other

[lil_red]

Hello everyone. so, I've just recently realized that I'm  transgender (not sure where on the spectrum),  as in I finally have an understanding of what I feel.  I really want to see a gender therapist but want to come out to my husband first. The problem is that I'm terrified of coming out to him for some reason. He is very open-minded but I feel as if he will redicule me and blow it off as a phase or something even though this is something I've felt ever since I was a small child. 

I feel as if I will hurt my family and I'm being selfish because I've never had extreme disphoria (thankful for that) and coming out isn't something that I absolutely NEED to do.  I mean I ve managed to hide my feelings this long (I'm 30) with no serious damage.

Any tips from others that have been in a similar position would be greatly appreciated.

I will be slow responding to any comments since privacy in my house is a rare thing. Just want to apologize in advance.

[SueNZ]

Hi Lil Red, When I dropped the bombshell on my wife it was one of the hardest things to do but a massive relief afterwards. She is still struggling with the loss of her husband, who 'I am' and where I am heading as that path is not yet defined. I buried my desires for 30 odd years and regret doing that as I have missed out on so much of my REAL ME.
I would think your husband will understand but he will be hit with waves of different emotions as my wife did.
You definitely need him alongside for this journey as it can't be done on your own while in a relationship.
Finding the right time is up to you but sooner than later helps. As for telling the rest of the world, small steps in line with seeing the therapist as you will be wanting to change things about yourself that others will slowly pick up on.