Did you tell your friends you were going on T?

[zetabyte99]

So just a question I'm facing as the reality of taking testosterone is coming ever closer. Did you guys tell your friends you were going on T and warn them things were going to start changing or just surprise them? I don't really want to talk about it to them because it makes me feel weird, we almost never talk about those kinds of things. Also I think it'll be funny when they start noticing changes. On the other side, it's a pretty big transitory period and I don't know if I will need someone to talk to about what's going on. What did you guys do?

[captains]

I have no intention of telling my friends because this is a pretty secret part of my life. It's just all very intimate, and I don't feel like I have the kind of relationship with my friends where I could or would share. If I did, I think I might tell one or two. Right now, I have one friend that I think would react in a way that I felt good about (mild excitement/support on my behalf without being over the top and weird about it), so I think I'll tell her. Otherwise, I dunno. I feel like it'd be a whole ordeal, and I'm a big baby, so I don't really feel equipped to handle it emotionally, haha.

[Tossu-sama]

I did tell them. They wanted to know how the transition process works so I told them what I knew. I don't know if they view it any different from being on any other medication, considering I don't make a big fuss about it.

One friend has more touch with the subject, though, since she's a practical nurse and taught my fiancée how to do my shots.

[FTMax]

I told my roommates, since I was on gel at the time and keeping it all in our shared bathroom. Aside from that, I don't think I explicitly told anyone. I may have made some generic posts about it on social media, but nothing beyond that. I think it was generally assumed when I came out that I would be going on T sooner rather than later, so it was no big deal when I actually did.

[Ryan55]

I told my close friends, before I started T, I actually met with them for lunch and told them, I did it one by one, they were all supportive and wanted to come to my first T appointment but I told them no, everyone else I didn't say anything to, they just kind of figured it out as my pics on Facebook became manlier lol and if they were really my friends they stuck by me, if not, they can go

[Pizzaparty78]

I told my friends the day after I started T. I was very excited and I wanted to share my excitement and what was to come. I knew them before I even started transitioning, so they were just as excited for me. I kinda hope that it will take me classmates as a surprise if they start noticing changes.

If it makes you feel uncomfortable, then I wouldn't tell them. Maybe tell your closest friend so you can talk to them about it. Also consider that if they start noticing changes, they'll ask you about it, so you'll end up talking about it at some point. If you see them often enough though, they may not notice any voice changes because you see them so often. They will, however, notice other changes if they're noticeable. 

[DarkWolf_7]

I didn't bother telling my friends, another trans* friend asked if I was on T when my voice got deeper but that was it.

[Daydreamer]

The only friend who really knows is my friend Andy, who is a brother to me. I don't think any of my other friends know, since I've kept my transition on the down low and the only thing I've done that allude to my transition is changing my name and pronouns on Facebook; never being on T.

[Inji]

did any guys here who are on T got asked by friends

I'm in that awkward situation at the moment... 
one of my old friend came for a visit (I haven't met her since starting T), and she asked me what happened  (I didn't really expect people to notice much changes since I'm just a few months on T...)
I didn't want to out myself as I know she's quite conservative... 
but I guess I will have to now, since I will meet her again soon over Christmas.

[Daydreamer]

I did get asked if I had a "sex change" by a childhood friend, but not exactly anything about T.

So yeah, that was a fun conversation.

[Kylo]

Well all my friends know I'm trans so I assume they assume I will be on T shortly. . .

If any of them are super surprised I'll be like, whut? You think I was kidding?

Guess I should add that I don't have superficial friends, only ones I trust. I'd not tell some superficial acquaintance.

[CursedFireDean]

All of my friends are part of the queer community and most are trans themselves, so I told them.

I did not tell my acquaintances, except for one girl who asked, until recently. I am pretty open about being trans, I try to be stealth in class and stuff but if people know me I don't mind if they know I'm trans. So I added starting hormones to my facebook as a life event recently, so now anyone who is friends with me can know. I was a little unsure about adding that, but I got good responses to it so.

I am glad I told at least a few people, because one of my friends would tell me things like "your voice is getting deeper!" and stuff like that and it helped boost my confidence, especially when I couldn't see changed myself.

[Bimmer Guy]

Is the OP ever going to come back to the thread?

I hate when that happens.....

[zetabyte99]

Is the OP ever going to come back to the thread?

I hate when that happens.....

Haha I'm sorry man, I just didn't really know what to say in response to the comments. I feel like it is a very personal thing and so I don't really want to talk about it. But also this is something that's really important, potentially drastic, and really exciting for me and I feel very alone because I have no one to share my excitement with. I'm stealth at college and  the few friends I've briefly mentioned some stuff to from high school really just don't understand the depth of it all.

[Moneyless]

I'm glad I'm not alone on this because my parents think it's very odd that I'm going on T in a few months without being completely out yet. I want to tell everyone when I feel comfortable with everyone referring to me as male, and that will most likely be when I'm on T. I feel uncomfortable and forced if people refer to me as male now because I don't look male and I know they won't be able to help but see me as female. I know that sounds very superficial but it will make me uncomfortable.

I only have two friends that know I am trans and only one knows I will be going on T soon. My brother doesn't even know, just my parents. Eventually I'll tell everyone when I am ready, most likely closer to my T date or maybe even after my first shot.

So did I tell my friends I'm going on T? Pfft, I haven't even told most of them I'm trans yet. LOL. But I am not in a school/work environment and I am not surrounded by the same people everyday. If that were the case I would tell everyone.

[WorkingOnThomas]

I decided to come out to everyone first. And now everyone assumes that I'm already on T - thank you, hirsutism. It just seemed like the easiest thing to do, actually. I didn't want to have to have to explain things on a case by case basis as people started to notice different things at different times. Kind of like ripping off a bandaid, I just wanted to get it over and done with in one go. Most people - outside my family - who know me don't seem to have a problem seeing me as a guy. But then, no one really considered me paragon of feminine virtue and comport to start with, and I live in a fairly liberal country. I'd say it all depends on your situation and whether you think you have the strength/need to have to have 'the talk' over and over and over again.

[lionheart]

The only friends I really specifically remember telling were the ones who are also trans. Like you, I also felt a little weird talking about it, so it was a lot easier to tell to people who I knew would have the same level of understanding. But no one else ever questioned me as the changes started happening, which I never even thought about until now. Looking back, it is a little weird that my friends weren't as curious as I'd expect most cis people to be. I definitely got comments on my voice dropping and noticeable things like that, but nobody asked why or tried to inquire any further than that.

As for someone to talk to, if you're worried about being uncomfortable bringing up the topic with your friends, you might want to look and see if there are any support groups around you, that way you can get several different perspectives on the experience. You might also consider seeing a therapist if you aren't already, which will definitely help when you're first starting T and having to deal with all the changes not just physically, but socially and emotionally.