Hello fellow members, subscribers, and guests of Susan's Place~!
My name is Isabelle, and I'm here with my partner Annie, who you should have already been introduced to...
Anywho... I am currently 21 years old, turning 22 some time before Winter comes back around to haunt us, or fill our days with some welcomed cold... Take you pick, I always enjoyed Winter ^^
My story begins on Valentines Day of this year as a transwoman. But before we begin a story... We must first end another, or at least close one chapter of many more to come.
Ever since 3rd grade, after hearing my mother explain to me that all the doctors, nurses, even her friends and family, believed I was gonna be a girl, yet adamantly she told them wrong, I have questioned whether I wanted to a boy or a girl... And that question grew more into a constant nagging by the time middle school came around, and by then, I moved from my happy life in Washington to a... Misfortune one in Florida... In the middle of Summer no less. I still never tried anything that was considered "girly" or feminine... Until I noticed how many women who had hoodies and jackets wrapped them around their waists whenever they took it off, and having an almost black, grey, and white attire with an almost jet black hoodie, I thought it was a great idea to try out.
The picking and bullying got worse from then on, but I at least felt a little happy wearing my hoodie in such a fashion, that I even tried zipping it up to make it a skirt, and to try on longer things like the vast majority of capes I have (which I dont suggest... Too snug and it gets caught under your feet a lot)
Unlike most people... I didnt reach puberty until high school, and even then, it only slowly sunk in until the next year, as a sophomore did I even get as much as a deeper voice... Senior year was when I stated to grow facial hair, which immediately I did not like. But I only thought of it at the time, and still do, that my face doesn't look good with facial hair. I have nothing against it, unless it was on me.
Eventually, out of nervous habit, and hating my own skin, I began to pull and pluck at my hairs, to the point where if I start panicking, or get very anxious, I would go so far as removing my eye brows entirely, along with any unwanted hairs, which grew to armpits, leg hair, arm hair, and... Pubes...
It took months to grow back my eyebrows, which I regret doing, cause now they are these bushy brown things.
But at least now, I've been taken better care of this body of mine, that I'm finally happy in.
Anyways, around the time I was working at my first job, my best friend and her boy were having another ine of their disputes, I basically told them I had enough of it, due to how stressful and demanding this job was. I'm not sure how, but within a week, they found Annie as their "marriage" counselor (they weren't married yet, actually separated, but that's basically what Annie was to them). They introduced her to me because they wanted someone who knew more about D&D and experienced with it to show her the ropes and stuff, but realized later their true goals was to hook us up... Which as you can tell, succeeded beyond expectations.
Annie and I lived in different states, and I was pressured to bring her to Florida from her home town, and after weeks, I finally gave in... Around my brother's birthday too, was when she arrived.
Skip some other stuff, and fast forward another year and a half, after the dating and other stuff, we moved again to her state in Utah. I picked up a much better job, better pay, hours, even workload was easier. And shortly after we moved, I stopped being dependent on caffeine, which I didnt recognized was a problem til I stopped downing two 24-packs in a single day. But my anxiety and depression only got worse and worse, until Annie was browsing through YouTube and saw a video about Steph and her 2 month HRT (assessment?), watched a little bit of it, and then showed me. She suggested I should try presenting when we go to my laser hair removal consultation. I'm not sure if I agreed reluctantly, or quickly... But I'm glad I did, because quickly my aspect of life changed for the better. I was sleeping peacefully, and well rested, my anxiety is now not constantly absorbing my energy level or causing panic attacks, depression is nearly gone... Even my almost non-existent pain tolerance improved to where I could handle having my hair pulled a bit, or having scratches, instead of nearly screaming whenever what I thought I was in pain, even thinking about the actions would inflict pseudo-injuries.
Now, we're going to a consultation for HRT... Along with doing a couple of tests and stuff to see how healthy I am, what treatments would be best, and everything else. I'm not sure when I can start, but I do hope soon...
Well, that was a long introduction ^^;
Well, thank you for listening to my life's story
And I'm sorry for it being so long... And if there is anything I did wrong, please let me know!
Again, thank you,
Izzy
