Hi

[Maddie]

Hello anyone 

I'm a mostly female spirit living in a male body.  Either a transwoman, or some other variation of non-binary fluid...

Experiencing varying levels of social and self-acceptance, rejection, and awareness; with ample doses of hetero-failure and success. 

In my case, I've been aware of being...what I'm not exactly sure i am...since early childhood    At times I fall into wishing I'd figured this all out and nicely resolved everything before now, but mostly I'm enjoying the progress of this project.

Initially, expresssing this "trans-ness" (girl traits and yearnings), and my shamed and angry responses to others' reactions to me, led into the mental health system, and years of chemical treatment for a psychosis misdiagnosis.  Some rather heavy medications and other drugs made it difficult to think clearly or deal with my "trans issues".  Or to live...

Currently I am 5 years off of medications, and this has led me to some clarity, acceptance, and more honestly expressing/representing myself publicly and privately  Attempting to live and love life, dancing on the fine line between defiant boldness and wary caution 

And smiling 

[V M]

Hi Tomika 

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Here's a few quick links to help you along

Please be sure to review

Things that you should read

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Hugs

V M

[TG CLare]

Hello and welcome, Tomika!

If you are searching, then this is the place to have come to. Many people have walked in your shoes and, if you shop at a thrift store, that could be literally be true, but I don't mean it like that of course. What I am getting at, is that many people on here have been in the same situation as you.

5 years is very good. Now you can take a look in the mirror and live your life to it's fullest! I began my real life at 58 but the way I feel, I would never go back even if I could. I am one person as opposed to having 2 separate people inside of me fighting for control of, well, me!

I accepted transition and am at peace now and have the one person running my life and it feels better. All those questions about the way I felt as a child have been answered and I am now true to myself.

Enjoy yourself here at Susan's and I hope that your own journey of self-discovery will be as satisfying and self-rewarding.

All the best.

Love,
Clare

[Maddie]

Thank you for responding! 

I'm checking out those introductory links, V M

CLare, glad to hear that you are finding peace.  I totally understand the feeling of multiple spirits struggling for control inside.  This path of transgender acceptance seems to be yielding more balance and serenity than I have known before.  Trying to incorporate this into a fuller, less isolated life in this world.  For me, right now, things are going better than ok, but it doesn't take much to stir things up...

Thrift stores?  I luv 'em...wouldn't want to live without 'em

See you around

[Laura_7]

Hello and welcome 

Here are a few resources that might help you :

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,188309.msg1674885.html#msg1674885


*hugs*

[gennee]

Hi Tomika and welcome to Susan's.

😊