No idea what to do about my 'job'

[Elis]

So I messaged my manager on the 28th of November saying I couldn't come in because of depression which she accepted.  I them came in 2 days later to work as that was on the rota and learnt she gave my shift away to someone else. Understandably I was peeved of about this because she hadn't told me. She asked me to come into a meeting the following Monday which I didn't turn up to because of depression. Being off for a week made it so much worse as well as my manager just assuming I couldn't come in for the rest of the week. I apologised for not turning up and she said I needed a letter from my GP saying I was healthy enough to work. I asked my GP but she wouldn't give me the letter.
So time goes by. Me becoming more depressed because I don't have a job to distract me; plus the embarrassment of my bosses knowing I have depression. I sent my manager a text in January saying I'm still trying to get the letter from my GP but she didn't reply. So I just assumed I lost the job which is understandable. I have social anxiety which makes it difficult for me to communicate with people plus my manager is nice but is too personal.
Today she sent me a text saying can I come into a meeting next week. I don't have a letter from my GP saying I'm healthy enough and it'll be almost impossible to convince her. I happen to have a GP appointment on Tuesday. The easiest option would be too have my old job but what do I say to the managers in the meeting? I don't know what to do.

[FTMax]

How much do they know about your situation? At least here, managers typically get some training in sensitivity and confidentiality so we know how to effectively work with folks who are having personal issues.

I'd explain the situation to your GP during your appointment on Tuesday and see if they can't help you out with a simple letter. I honestly don't understand why they wouldn't if they know that you struggle with anxiety and depression.

Whether or not you have a letter, I would go to the meeting with the managers and just let them know about as much of your situation as you're comfortable with. Tell them you sometimes get depressed, but you have regular contact with your doctor(s) and genuinely want to work. Depending on what kind of job it is, they may or may not be able to have you back without a doctor's note, but I think being up front and honest is in your best interest.

[Elis]

The problem is I took time off work Aug and early November because of depression which they know about. Now I'm on T and antidepressants I think I can cope a lot better. But I doubt they'd believe that. If I'm able to keep my job I might have the same problems as before; if I decide not to go into that meeting then being unemployed definitely won't help either. I just hate being seen as the mentally ill one by my managers and the trans one to everyone else.

[FTMax]

Hmm, I'd definitely try again with your GP then. I'd at least find out why they weren't willing to write you a note in the first place and explain to them how important it is that you have some kind of documentation to take to your job.

[Laura_7]

Well if there is a meeting its possible they are still interested in you.
What kind of job do you have, have you aquired some skills there or did you go along well with your colleagues ?

What are your wishes ?
Getting back in job, working as before ?
Working fewer hours ?
Can you do the job, and tell them you want to try ?
Would it be possible to have some relief ... like a bit an easier workplace ?


*hugs*

[Elis]

Last time my GP wouldn't write a letter was because at the same time I asked for antidepressants :/.  I should have been more assertive but good old anxiety put an end to that. I'll try to be more assertive this time.
I get along with everything fine although I feel I'm always too awkward. I only tend to do 20hrs a week as that's as much as I can handle. I feel like I'm a burden; they've been nice about everything but I find it hard to communicate and always feel so awkward. I guess I just have to go to the meeting and suck it up. It's a choice of either trying to get my job back or staying unemployed and risk being as catonic ally depressed as I was in Dec and Jan.

[Laura_7]

Well look...
there are studies showing being transgender has biological connections ...
so its nobodys fault ... especially not yours...
you try to cope as best as you can ...
so nothing to be ashamed about.

You might simply speak up ... say you'd like to try for 20 hrs ...
and not feel ashamed, its all right and you do the best you can.
Just be yourself and try to relax .


*hugs*