I need answers!

[DiscreetGirl]

So thru out my life I tried to fit in with the boys, but after 16 years I realized after being bullied for not being normal for other reasons not a trans issue. I was never ment to be a boy, I hanged out with girls when I was younger, played with holly pockets with girls. Never able to fit in with the boys in my life, in school now, all I do doing lunch is talk to these two girls, never really want to be around boys. I never really wore girl clothes as I was growing up from toddler years. But now I got smarter, and I know if I do something like grow hair out, I know be judged.  Does this still make me trans?

My other issue is that this trans stuff is to my head, keeps coming back. Only way to get away is work on my small engine, play video games and sometimes masturbating if I dont get thoughts in my head. I drool over bras&panties, wanting a nice body, being the receiver in a intercourse. I worry that if I don't get help now I feel I won't live my 20s like I want to. There's not much I can really do without be suspicious like going somewhere for a therapist that's 2 hours away.

[Dena]

You have said a good deal in that post. You are the only one who can determine what you are but from your post, I think you are transsexual. Like you, I never fit in with the boys and I had many activities to keep myself busy so I didn't think about it as much. I want the body and the life of a girl starting as young as 13 years old.

The best solution is for you to talk to your parents about this and start treatment. At the very least, you might be placed on puberty blockers which will stop puberty and reduce the strong feelings in your head. In a year or two you would be old enough to start hormones but it might be possible for you to live the life of a girl before that.

It is also possible your parents will not permit you to do this in which case you will have to plan your life carefully so when you turn 18 you will have the money and freedom to do what you need to do.

If you decide to come out to your parents, we have letters and will help you prepare for talking to your parents. Just let us know what type of help you need.

I am going to give you two links to explore. The first is our Wiki where you will learn what transgender is. The second is "the transition channel" . You may not be able to see a therapist yet, but this youtube channel was made by a therapist for people like you to explore your feelings.

[stephaniec]

therapy would be of great value. It's one of my biggest regrets, not get therapy early in life.