Congratulations on getting scheduled for surgery, Jonathan! Your date is almost here! The week or two before surgery were tough for me - I couldn't keep my mind of anything else! It'll be here before you know it, and then you'll be navigating a whole new world. I am currently 10 days post-op, so here is my perspective (keeping in mind that everyone's experience is a little different):
I would echo Wolfy that the first couple days are the hardest physically (I'm actually finding this second week to be the hardest mentally, but more on that later) but also that you won't be doing much but sleeping, ambulating as needed, and occasionally eating. I didn't shower until my first post-op (5 days later) when my bandages were removed and I was cleared to do so. I have very fine/oily hair and oily skin, so I thought this would be a nightmare, but it really wasn't that bad. I used facial cleansing wipes to wash my face each morning, hit my armpits and privates with baby wipes, and used some dry shampoo on my hair. No problems!
I did not need help using the bathroom, either getting myself there or wiping. If you have drains, you will definitely need help with that (I didn't, so no problem). I developed a method for helping myself to get up from laying down (basically, crunch those abs to sit up, sit loosely cross legged, then rock back and forth until you have the momentum to rock up on to your knees, then stand from there. Bingo!) - my partner tried to help get me standing once or twice, but honestly, there's not a whole lot people can do to help you get up, since most of it would involve pulling on the arms or chest. Since you've got a couple weeks to go, I WOULD recommend doing some sit ups and practicing good squat form now, since you'll need your core strength to get up, and will need to squat down for basically anything not at shoulder height. Practice using your core and whole feet to power up from a low squat - I was doing too much of the balls of my feet the first few days and wound up with sore calves.
Get a back scratcher. They seem frivolous, but they are not. They are very, very useful, especially if you don't want to ask your parents to be constantly scratching you.
I moved my dishes down and was able to get snacks or fix simple meals myself within a couple days. I was able to pretty much dress myself (though carefully, and slowly) in a button up and jeans for my 5 day post op (move all your clothes down between waist and shoulder height), though I did need my partner to put my shoes on and tie them. Yesterday, at 9 days post op, I was able to dress myself in a tshirt (!!), jeans, AND put on and tie my shoes myself! I have been able to shower myself since I first started at day 5, though slowly and carefully, and I definitely had my partner on audible stand by for the first time in case I needed help.
I DID need help keeping my med log, especially for the first 4-5 days. There's so many things to take, and it's going to be too hard for you to track. Tell your parents to plan on helping you get your medications (you will not be able to open those child proof bottles) and marking down the times you've taken everything/keeping track of when it's time for your next dose. This might be in the middle of the night - I had an antibiotic I had to take every 6 hours, which meant my partner had alarms set for 9am, 3pm, 9pm, and 3am, when she would wake me and give me my dose.
You will need help fixing meals, and refilling your water (don't forget bendy straws - so useful!) and doing stuff that would require getting up (e.g. turning off lights). After my 5 day post-op appointment, when my bandages were removed, I had to start applying an antibiotic cream to my incisions (I had a DI) and nipple bolsters, and I needed my partner to do this the first few times (I could not reach far enough back into my armpits). I probably COULD have, if I really needed to (i.e. if you want to avoid your parents directly seeing/touching the incisions) but the first time I did it made me lightheaded, and I was grateful for help.
What I did NOT anticipate, but really wish that I had known, is that the first 5-7 days is really only the first hurdle. These days are the most physically demanding, but they are also firmly and clearly in your "recovery period," and so there are no real expectations that you should be doing anything but resting and sleeping. Now in my second week, I'm experiencing a lot of discouragement about the help I still need. I can move around, get dressed, fix meals, and shower, sure... but I still can't open the dryer to switch the laundry. I can't push the trash down when it's full. I can't empty the dishwasher, or scoop my cat's litterbox. I can't wipe down the counters when they get gross. I can't carry my bag to work with anything more than my laptop and a water bottle, and even that is seriously pushing it. I can't really ride the train to work, as I usually would, at least not without getting thoroughly exhausted, being completely paranoid the entire time that someone is going to bump or push me, and having to ask strangers to give up their seats, with no visible reason as to why. I can't walk more than a couple blocks, work more than a couple hours, or go out of the house without needing to take a nap afterwards because it takes so much effort. I can't reach to the back of my cabinets, and I can't throw my towel over the shower bar to dry out. Everything takes 2-3x as long, and requires 2-3x as much effort.
That being said, I would 1000% do it all over again, of course. Seeing my chest is beyond worth it, and it is without even a scrap of doubt the best decision I have ever made for myself, in my entire life. It's worth it. It's beyond worth it. Looking in the mirror and seeing yourself AS YOURSELF is worth hanging in there for. Hell, it's worth living for, and nothing can take that away. But, somehow, I totally glossed over this second phase of recovery - I thought once the physical hurdles were passed, I would be basically good to go besides not being able to exercise or take hot baths for a month. I didn't count on all the help I would STILL need, and the psychological impact of this in terms of feeling dependent and not being able to contribute to my household in all the ways I was normally used to is huge. I'm a busy and effective person, and though I have a supportive and loving partner, it's hard to have to ask her to do things all damn day, and I know it takes a toll on her to have her daily chores and efforts doubled because I'm out of commission. I wish someone had spoke or written about the lengthy and gradual process that is recovery, rather than just the immediate aftermath, as this is where I'm struggling the most. I was all good with baby wipes and anti-nausea meds and weathered those days relatively well, but these days, I wasn't expecting. Briefing your parents (and yourself) on the notion that you may need several weeks of help with small things is the best way to avoid disappointment and discouragement.
Hope this is helpful, Jonathan, and good luck! We are all here for you!
