My ex drove me to surgery, stayed with me overnight at a hotel, drove me home, and then left. I was on my own for a week, and then he came back to take me to get my drains out. I went back to work at 8 days post-op.
I didn't need any help around the house. My roommates were around and I put my surgeon's phone number on the fridge just in case they needed to get in touch with her on my behalf. But other than that, they were just there. I did enough prep work pre-surgery that help really wasn't needed (cleaning, cooking/freezing large quantities of food, etc.).
I drove for the first time at 3 days post-op, and it was just around the corner to pick up lunch. You can drive when you are off pain killers and feel comfortable enough to do so, but you should defer to what your surgeon says.
You could take a train or bus, but I would worry about being jostled. At least in a car when you're driving, you know what you're going to do and what the car is going to do. You can see the bumps in the road and things you'll need to maneuver around. Not the case in a train or bus. I would avoid it if you have the option.
As far as normal activities, I think it depends what you mean. I could heat up food, use the bathroom, shower, walk my dog, etc. as soon as I came home. But that was about as active as I got for the first week. For the dog walking, I used a waist leash so that my arms didn't get unexpectedly pulled.
It really depends though. All the experiences here are all over the place. Plan for the worst, and be pleasantly surprised if it isn't that bad for you
