Ok dramatic title!
I threw all of my male clothes out years ago when I transitioned and gave them all to the Goodwill stores. All except a rather expensive suit.
I was sort of hoping to give it to a transman as it cost several hundred dollars and excellent quality and I thought one of my trans brothers would like it.
I was going out tonight and had my shower etc and wandering around the house playing rock music at crazy levels and thought, I wonder what I look like in an expensive male suit?
So after doing my hair and makeup I put it on.
Jeez all my crossdressing thoughts came back; guilt, secrecy, I hope no one sees me.
Of course I had no male shirt, and no male shoes, so I did the white blouse and bare feet thingy, nail polished toes and all.
I went to my mirror fully expecting to see the return of 'him' and sort of ready to have a cry.
I saw this woman trying to wear a suit that didn't fit. My boobs pushed it out, the waistcoat didn't quite look right, but looked interesting as the girls sort of spilled out.
The trousers looked odd - yep my hips are different. And a distinct lack of bulge (Yep released why guys want STP's not only for the P bit)
It was weird!
I saw a woman in male drag.
It was reaffirming. It felt so odd.
I also realised that my legs itched like crazy.
I put a skirt on, went to my meeting and thought, my life has changed.
La de dah.