pre-HRT, feel like testosterone is controlling me?

[kiteless]

does anyone else remember or is feeling this way? it's like i have this constant drive to always masturbate, and even though the fantasies and mechanics are different and better, the erections are incessant and i always feel the need to "release" myself even though i would be perfectly okay getting the job done without an erection. when i was a teenager i had a lot of guilt surrounding masturbation because i was raised in a very conservative household, and i felt like it was this beast that i couldn't control, like an addiction. and now i have guilt for different reasons... i don't want to be horny like a boy, and when i am it makes me feel upset and anxious. i can't start HRT for forever but i'm wondering if i'm building it up in my mind to be this big solution that won't make that much of a difference.

[MeghanMe]

I'm 4 months into HRT, and while masturbation is still fun, the drive isn't there like it used to be. So don't worry, this is one of those things where the hormones make a big difference.

On the other hand, the habits won't necessarily break themselves. There might still be a little mental work to do there.

[Dena]

Not a constant drive for me but far to often. In my case, surgery removed the last of the urge by removing the T factories. Today, blocker are available to do the same job chemically and when you start HRT, the driving urge should be reduced within a few weeks. For me the act put the transsexual feelings back in the closet for a few hours so I could have some peace in my life. It didn't last long but it was all I had.

[warlockmaker]

I had a very high T count ..in my 20s it was 1200, when I decided to start HRT some 40 years later it was 850. Throughout my life I masturbate a few times a day. However, when my dysphoria started getting bad I used masturbating as an escape. At that time before starting HRT, I would get stoned (I don't drink ), and each night I would masturbate at least 5 times. Just needed to escape my dysphoria. I started seeing a therapist over 8 years ago and after 5 years of therapy I accepted that I was tg and started HRT. my life changed and I found peace and yes, I still masturbated once a day with the greatest orgasms.

I had my srs some 2 months ago and I'm feeling very horn.  Can't masturbate yet as its still recovering. I now have found even greater peace.

[SofiN]

I'm 4 months in (tomorrow!) just like MeghanMe above, and for me the drive completely disappeared once my dosage increased from the starter dose around a month ago. I have no libido whatsoever! That might change later on when things develop and surgeries come of course.

This definitely seems to be a hormone driven thing, but with all things it does vary from person to person.

[KayXo]

What's so wrong about being horny or wanting to have sex/masturbate often? What's so wrong with libido? I had no problem with this, pre or post-HRT.

[Deborah]

Before HRT I was like Warlockmaker and it was in control of me.  With HRT I can turn it on and off at will and rarely need the release, maybe every two or three weeks.  Sometimes even more infrequently.  It's like being released from a torture cell with freedom to do as I wish.


Sapere Aude

[cindianna_jones]

My drive was never ending until I had GRS. The hormones did nothing to quell the need. I even wacked off just hours before my surgery. I am SOOO happy that urge no longer drives me. I absolutely hated myself for it. Not for any moral reason, I just hated that 'male' aspect of my very being.

[FreyasRedemption]

So, this is an issue other transwomen have, too?
It's not just me who has this insanely overactive sex drive that makes you have random erections and masturbate five times a day?

[Soli]

it's very interesting to be living it, I couldn't have imagine it before. Now that my T is down to that of a cis woman, I don't even think about the sexual aspect of life, as opposed to pretty much all the time before starting HRT. Just a few months ago... I can still masturbate, I verify if it still works, enjoying it, but... the other day I couldn't come and it didn't matter, and then another day again it felt the same as if I had although I had not... satisfied (that was impossible before). I doubt my T level was ever high, it was low before starting HRT and since 2012 when I had it checked the 1st time for other medical issues. So yes it is related, sex drive and T, but then again... I started masturbating way before puberty and I learned recently I was doing it like girls do, laying on the belly. Wow, I can't believe I just said that in public haha hmmmm... I doubt my T count was very high at 4 years old, so... I think sex drive is also related to something else too, dunno what. I never had an issue really with my genitals and still don't. I can't say I ever had an issue with my body and I learned here today from Dena about social gender dysphoria as opposed to body gender dysphoria. I like miself as a T-girl 

[kiteless]

So, this is an issue other transwomen have, too?
It's not just me who has this insanely overactive sex drive that makes you have random erections and masturbate five times a day?

i think the reason i do it more often is because i know it's not really part of me and i'm trying to get rid of it, turn it off so i can feel normal when i go out in public

[juliehope]

How life can change!

I always wanted sex, but could only ever perform imagining that I was the girl.  I was attracted to girly girls and dreamed of becoming one, but I was not attracted to men. After hrt and t blockers, I became happier and my sexuality began to change.   Currently, I cannot masturbate without discomfort, and a climax is extremely to achieve. However, giving and receiving oral sex allows me to have an orgasm. I cannot wait to have surgery and find a muscular male partner who will hold and protect me.

Having breast's, (smaller than I had hoped, so more surgery required) and a body without hair has made my life so much better and it was worth all the sacrifices made.

Take care
Love Jools x