strangely comfortable with my body

[CrazyCatMan]

I feel like I am strangely comfortable with my body for a transman. While I desperately want top surgery but my breast really don't bother me (I don't even wear a binder) I think they look amazing. I almost feel like it's a crime to get them removed, they're practically a work of art. (sounding super narcissistic, sorry ) I also have a tiny waist, broad shouldered and wide hips so I have a very dramatic hourglass figure and I don't really feel dysphoric about it.

I feel like these things should bother me more.

Anyone else having this problem (if it can even be called a problem) or have very little body dysphoria. 

[RobynD]

I was never very dysphoric about my body. It was mainly emotional for me. I entered adulthood with quite a bit of upper body strength but a fairly feminine lower half. Since HRT and considerable breast growth, i have become very comfortable with my body and larger hips and butt have been another bonus. I don't miss my old shape but i was never that bad with it.

The one exception was body hair. I recoiled at that stuff. I waxed, shaved, you name it to get rid of that. I am so happy that hormones has made much of it thinner and some of it going is going away entirely. Makes my maintenance so much easier.

[CrazyCatMan]

I don't miss my old shape but i was never that bad with it.

I think that's what i'm feeling, i don't want to have my breast but I don't think they are ugly. I kind of wish I could give them to someone who wants them.

[Elis]

Coincidentally I posted a topic yesterday about my shift in dysphoria levels; if you want to check that out. Before T I hated my chest and strongly disliked my body; but now I've been on T for almost 6 months I now just dislike my chest slightly and am sort if indifferent about my body; although I want it to look more masculine. I think I have very nice looking breasts and I'm sure many girls would love to have them; but I want them gone as soon as possible because they don't belong on me.
I find it strange that my dysphoria has shifted so dramatically (it might be partly due to me being 10% agender) but I have to remember that every trans person experiences dysphoria differently and to different degrees or some don't have dysphoria at all. Too often the media portrays us as loathing our bodies and feeling 'trapped' when in reality there's nothing wrong with liking ourselves. It doesn't make you less trans.

[suzifrommd]

I didn't have much body dysphoria. I liked my body. I had surgery solely because I didn't want to die not knowing what it felt like to have a female bottom.

Though I really like my new body, too.

[Ayden]

I'm perfectly okay with everything down below the belt and I wasn't fond of my chest, but it didn't cause me distress like some guys experience. I actually had a dream right after I had top surgery where I was serving my breasts tea and explaining to them that it was just best we went our separate ways and I felt kinda bad for them. I woke up and laughed about it, but I had little funeral for them by burning my one bra I had left.

Don't get me wrong, I'm much happier with my chest now and I feel infinitely more comfortable,  but I never hated my body. The way I look at it, this body is the only one I'll ever have and I want to take care of it, even if it refused to develop the way it should have in my mind. For a body, mines alright.

Except that bum knee. Ol' Righty is a jerk.

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[CrazyCatMan]

I actually had a dream right after I had top surgery where I was serving my breasts tea and explaining to them that it was just best we went our separate ways and I felt kinda bad for them. I woke up and laughed about it, but I had little funeral for them by burning my one bra I had left.

lol kind of like breaking up with my "reallly nice but not what I was looking for" boyfriend. boob funeral,  sounds like something I would do myself

[CrazyCatMan]

Coincidentally I posted a topic yesterday about my shift in dysphoria levels; if you want to check that out. Before T I hated my chest and strongly disliked my body; but now I've been on T for almost 6 months I now just dislike my chest slightly and am sort if indifferent about my body; although I want it to look more masculine. I think I have very nice looking breasts and I'm sure many girls would love to have them; but I want them gone as soon as possible because they don't belong on me.
I find it strange that my dysphoria has shifted so dramatically (it might be partly due to me being 10% agender) but I have to remember that every trans person experiences dysphoria differently and to different degrees or some don't have dysphoria at all. Too often the media portrays us as loathing our bodies and feeling 'trapped' when in reality there's nothing wrong with liking ourselves. It doesn't make you less trans.

oops, i didn't know there was a post already discussing this, guess i should move this talk over there.

it is really hard to explain wanting to look more masculine while also not being bothered my feminine looks, it almost seems like a oxymoron.

[Nicole]

I was never very dysphoric about my body. It was mainly emotional for me. I entered adulthood with quite a bit of upper body strength but a fairly feminine lower half. Since HRT and considerable breast growth, i have become very comfortable with my body and larger hips and butt have been another bonus. I don't miss my old shape but i was never that bad with it.

The one exception was body hair. I recoiled at that stuff. I waxed, shaved, you name it to get rid of that. I am so happy that hormones has made much of it thinner and some of it going is going away entirely. Makes my maintenance so much easier.

I was very much the same, while I wanted a female body badly and watching family members mature into young women at first was killing me, I hated body hair and it drove me nuts. It was the major cause for me questioning everything.


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[JoanneB]

I've always disliked my body in general. A begrudging acceptance of It is What it is. Not much I can do about it. A bit of a "Chicken & Egg" situation for me growing up as a fat kid. Funny how that all started to balloon a year or so after mom told me in very clear terms that boys do not wear dresses. and more so as puberty came on.

I also never had the intensity of genital dysphoria many transwomen do. While I'd much rather not have them, I don't hate them. In fact we've had a lot of great times together. (My narcistic TMI moment) In yet another great "Trans Irony" of my life, it was magnificent pre-HRT.

Post HRT I have to admit it is a bit of an alien, and oddly wonderfull, feeling to actually like to love being in my own skin.

[Pengola]

I've never disliked my body but recently I've been feeling rather insecure about it. I think it may be because I've started to hang around with some girls who are fully transitioned and they keep making it a point to tell me that I have to wear my make up like this, and use a waist trainer to give myself curves and I need padding or else people will be able to see signs of manliness. Its made me a lot more self conscious......However I thought to myself and realized that despite myself not having the ideal female body shop, women come in all shapes and sizes and I am by no means a masculine V shape. Im slowly starting to become comfortable with myself again

[MercenaryElf]

Though the physical side of my dysphoria centers mostly around my breasts, it's very mild compared to the socially-related dysphoria that wrecks me.  It's probably less that my figure itself bothers me as it is that people see it and can't think anything other than "female" no matter how I act, which then triggers the social issue.

If I had the money right now, I'd get top surgery as soon as I could.  But I have the dramatic hourglass as well, and feel more than a little guilty that I don't appreciate it as much as society (especially friends/family) tells me I should.  I've said more than once to people that I wish there was a way I could give my figure to someone who would show it more appreciation than I do.

I'm perfectly okay with everything down below the belt and I wasn't fond of my chest, but it didn't cause me distress like some guys experience. I actually had a dream right after I had top surgery where I was serving my breasts tea and explaining to them that it was just best we went our separate ways and I felt kinda bad for them. I woke up and laughed about it, but I had little funeral for them by burning my one bra I had left.

That's brilliant.  I've debated turning whatever bras I have left after surgery into some kind of arty sewing project, but don't think I'd want to display or continue to see whatever I created from them.  Bra burning and a dream tea party sounds like a much better approach.

[lil_red]

That's kind of like me, I've never really hated my body but would love to have a masculine body. Although since I've started dressing more masculine I do wish my curves weren't so prominent so it would be easier to find men's clothing that fits properly.

[CrazyCatMan]

That's kind of like me, I've never really hated my body but would love to have a masculine body. Although since I've started dressing more masculine I do wish my curves weren't so prominent so it would be easier to find men's clothing that fits properly.

well fitting clothes are so hard to find. I can never find pants that fit, it is so infuriating. By the time I find pants that fit my hips they are way to long in the crotch and legs, and I get that weird saggy crotch fold.

[lil_red]

I've said more than once to people that I wish there was a way I could give my figure to someone who would show it more appreciation than I do.

.

If only that were possible. I would be on Craigslist like "looking for Trans woman to trade shoulders with. If yours are broad enough I will throw in a couple of b cup boobs for free"

[JoanneB]

well fitting clothes are so hard to find. I can never find pants that fit, it is so infuriating. By the time I find pants that fit my hips they are way to long in the crotch and legs, and I get that weird saggy crotch fold.

Welcome to the Club!

Well, The club I belong to. This transwoman's club. It's either Old-Man pants that are FAR more baggier but can get over your hips with about 4" of slack at your waist. All without the crotch near your knees or....

On the plus side, "Normal" slacks are a great "Self Abuse" (as in eating constantly) indicator. THe few that that you find that fit "Perfect" soon either climb up or down or both as you eat like there is no hope of (a better) tomorrow

[AnxietyDisord3r]

If I had the money right now, I'd get top surgery as soon as I could.  But I have the dramatic hourglass as well, and feel more than a little guilty that I don't appreciate it as much as society (especially friends/family) tells me I should.  I've said more than once to people that I wish there was a way I could give my figure to someone who would show it more appreciation than I do.

This resonates for me a lot. I think in a society where I was accepted for being who I was, I would be able to cope better.

That said, I'm seeing positive changes on T I didn't expect. So sometimes modern medicine isn't all bad.

[AnxietyDisord3r]

well fitting clothes are so hard to find. I can never find pants that fit, it is so infuriating. By the time I find pants that fit my hips they are way to long in the crotch and legs, and I get that weird saggy crotch fold.

Always imagined that crotch fold was a bulge. I find I prefer clothes where it isn't obvious to God and everyone what I'm packing down below.