Please help

[Kairi]

Hi. I am 21 (male at birth)  years old and have never put any of this to words before. I've struggled with depression off and on for as long as I remember, but have never been able to directly connect this depression with anything in my life. Around the time I began puberty, 11ish, I began to wish that I was female. I would think about it constantly, and still do. Even when I try to distract myself I come right back to imagining myself as a female, what I would be doing, wearing, ect. When looking at other women, I find myself feeling jealous of their hair, body, breasts, every little detail. I can't stop thinking about this and I'm looking for help. Feel free to ask me whatever 

[Dena]

This may not be exactly the response to your question, but you deleted the first post I made to your thread so I dug it out of the thrash for you.

Welcome to Susan's Place. It has been said on this site if you have to ask if you are trans you are. I know that's not enough for you but I am giving you two links that may help. The first is our WIKI where you will learn more about the terms that describe transgender. The second is "the transition channel" where you will be in a therapy session exploring your feelings. You may post questions on this thread and I will be happy to answer them for you.

We issue to all new members the following links so you will best be able to use the web site.

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

[stephaniec]

experiment with your truth to find your reality.

[Laura_7]

hello and welcome 


Here at the links are a few resources that could help you:

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,194986.msg1737439.html#msg1737439


Remember its a step by step process.
I'd say just do the next step, try a few things, and listen to what you feel brings you joy ...
and keep going 


*hugs*

[suzifrommd]

I can't stop thinking about this and I'm looking for help.

You are not alone. Nearly everyone on this site was in a similar place to you at some point in your lives. We know what it feels like.

A lot of people have found it helpful to find a qualified gender therapist (though make sure they're knowledgeable about transgender people). Also many areas have support groups for transgender people.

And keep posting. There is a lot of wisdom and caring among the members of these forums.

[Jacqueline]

I agree with Suzi.

Next big step would be to find a therapist to talk to about all this. If you can find a specific gender therapist, great. However, even a general one can help start you off and might be able to set you up with a specialist from there.

Welcome. I hope you find what you are looking for.

With warmth,

Joanna

[Rachel]

I agree, a gender therapist is a good next step.

[Rebecca]

To ask is a good start people really should question everything to get the best out of life.

You'll already know but Susans is great place to ask things as there are many who enjoy helping with their responses.

Keep asking questions and I'm sure you'll work yourself out eventually. Heck it might even be fun.