Quote from: ElizabethK on June 10, 2017, 06:22:07 PM
IMHO Passing happens between the ears or not at all. You don't pass until you think you do no matter what anyone tells you. I see thread after thread from beautiful girls asking if they pass....
When you ask the question what is it you are asking? Passing for me may mean a different thing for you...there are various forms of passing from over the phone to a Dr's office. Where is it you want to be?
Many of these threads involve gorgeous girls who just can't see it or have a small imperfection that they feel ruins every chance they ever had to pass. However there are also people here who are convinced they don't just pass but are glamourous...not how I would describe them. So when I say passing happens between the ears what I mean is that you have to have a certain amount of self acceptance in the first place. When you are satisfied you have decided you pass then you will ....
I accept myself just fine. I have a long-term--four years!!--Boyfriend who loves me, my doctor forgets my status and asks about periods, I have never not passed for over three years and started passing within 60 days. But, yet, sometimes I think I don't pass.
I do believe confidence and acceptance goes a long way. But, I have a 34C-27-35, I'm 5'5 and 130 lbs, and I'm cute, rapidly approaching pretty. My voice, bleh, but still if I have to pass as my non name-changed self, they always ask for me. I have to deepen my voice and it still doesn't work, meaning I pass.
The OP and everyone else should realize transition takes years. I get hit on all the time or it feels that way and if I look a guy in they eyes, he always, always says "hi." But, it's hard to see yourself. Its not about acceptance so much that it's hard to live 20, 30 years in a body and then really see these changes. Also, my body really filled out in the last 100 months. So, any worries the OP has about passing and body, time will fix it.
My sitch my be a little non-reg since I had trouble passing as a boy before transition. IMO, the OP will pass just fine. With the right hair, she could pass right now and could easily go full-time. But, it's a drastic change so I would take baby steps. It sounds great but what if you get clocked by some troglodyte and he goes full Trump and tweets the "->-bleeped-<-" he clocked; to make matters worse, he was your best friend.
I may never get clocked and may have an awesome BF (future hubby?! +fingers crossed+) but I lost every friend and the ones who wanted to hang with me after were all people who just wanted to see "it." It meaning my drastic transition. It was drastic and I still can't believe HRT worked that way. The one thing I do know is that I tried to go full-time before I was ready, I may have ran back into the closet only to emerge 40 years later when I hit 70. I'm sure a lot of older trans peeps would have transitioned earlier but times were different. But rememer: they aint great now either. But you will pass, just do it when you know your ready. Also, even though I dissected the post I quoted, she had a lot of very excellent advice.
