Boys don't cry

[Jack-the-banana]

I'd like to know you guys' opinions on the movie Boys don't cry. I thought someone might've started a thread about it already, but I couldn't find any, so I'm starting one myself. have you watched it? Do you think it was accurate to how ftms feel? Could you relate to it? Did it make you feel a certain way? Basically I would just like to know your opinion on it.

[invisiblemonsters]

that movie is horrible for anyone in their early transition or someone who is already fearful of being transgender. i watched it before i was on T or had surgery and it was not a good idea. it makes you fearful of other guys, dating, etc. it makes you feel like you have to be ashamed for being who you are, like you are lying to people when you say you're a man. it's horrible. not only that but they did get a cisgender female to play a transgender person, which is problematic on its own.

[Daydreamer]

I've yet to see the movie to avoid getting set off, and seeing only a fraction of the documentary based on Brandon's life that followed shortly after just made it worse.

[jlaframboise]

I mean I'd have to agree with some of this. When I was pre-T and watched that movie, a fear was instilled in me that if I had sex with a girl as a trans person, that I'd be punished for it eventually. Made me extremely dysphoric. I feel like the directors didn't do their research. But, I do appreciate that it introduced the idea of transgender MEN into Hollywood.

[invisiblemonsters]

I mean I'd have to agree with some of this. When I was pre-T and watched that movie, a fear was instilled in me that if I had sex with a girl as a trans person, that I'd be punished for it eventually. Made me extremely dysphoric. I feel like the directors didn't do their research. But, I do appreciate that it introduced the idea of transgender MEN into Hollywood.

yes but the fact is, the person playing him was a cisgender female, making people have that stereotype that we are just females dressed as men to deceive people like some people already think of transgender people (especially trans women). the only time i saw a really good representation of a trans man who was played by someone who is trans was on the fosters. they showed him before he had surgery and T, what it was like to struggle having to use the female bathrooms and people not getting it, and also what he looked like after he started T and had surgery. they even had him be topless and show his scars.

[jlaframboise]

yes but the fact is, the person playing him was a cisgender female, making people have that stereotype that we are just females dressed as men to deceive people like some people already think of transgender people (especially trans women). the only time i saw a really good representation of a trans man who was played by someone who is trans was on the fosters. they showed him before he had surgery and T, what it was like to struggle having to use the female bathrooms and people not getting it, and also what he looked like after he started T and had surgery. they even had him be topless and show his scars.

That's very true. That stereotype is so engraved in my brain as how society sees me so there's that part of me that's just... Used to it. That blows. Yanno? We can only work and strive towards better representation which I'm excited for. especially in sports and movies.

[yaka]

yes but the fact is, the person playing him was a cisgender female, making people have that stereotype that we are just females dressed as men to deceive people like some people already think of transgender people (especially trans women). the only time i saw a really good representation of a trans man who was played by someone who is trans was on the fosters. they showed him before he had surgery and T, what it was like to struggle having to use the female bathrooms and people not getting it, and also what he looked like after he started T and had surgery. they even had him be topless and show his scars.

Boys Don't Cry is over 15 years old. There simply wasn't many openly transgender actors out there at the time. I think it's a great story, but certainly not wholly representative of the transman experience. It's your typical LGBT tragedy.

[Kylo]

Actors not being the character's specific race, exact orientation or GID doesn't bother me in movies so long as the material is handled in the right way. I haven't actually seen Boys Don't Cry, but I do know about the case. I will catch this movie at some point.

There was a movie about an FTM that I felt wasn't really handled well and that was called Predestination. It wasn't specifically about the FTM trans experience, but used it more as a gimmick to fuel the plot. As a sci-fi movie I suppose it is too far removed to be compared to a real life event like in Boys Don't Cry. Nonetheless that movie bothered me because it conveyed the idea that the character was forced to become a man while an adult, because their doctors apparently said so. It's never clear why the person allowed it to be forced upon them, because clearly they did not want it at all.

[bluebird]

I personally liked the movie, even though Brandon was played by a cisgender female actor. It did instill fear in me about the consequences of being openly trans and have this terrible incident happen. It doesn't have a solution to the problem of transphobia, homophobia, etc. It just...Ended tragically. The movie also didn't delve into what it's like being a transman. It just showed Brandon hanging out with his friends and trying to keep his status a secret through the eyes of cisgender people. I feel like movies that features trans people should have some sort of solution to the problem since our lives are already tragic.

But overall, I liked that the movie opened some doors regarding trans issues, specifically FTM issues. Hopefully in the future they'll use actual trans actors for trans characters

[lil_red]

I watched the documentary first which really touched and scared me at the same time. The movie didn't have the same effect on me as the documentary for some reason.

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[Midnightstar]

Okay, i'm in my early transition and i watched this movie would i recommend it for everyone no not without warning. it was scary in a way.
But to be honest i loved the film, i was actually scared to write this but i did i liked the film.
I thought it was a good film and i understood because when that happened was long ago and i think the time zone  explains a lot of things. Okay, also i should note the reason why i liked the film i actually like seeing how he lived his life i found it interesting.

[anibioman]

Hurts to watch, I couldn't finish it. It doesn't bother me a cis woman played a trans man. He was early in his transition hadn't medically transitioned at all. Plus there are no great trans actors.

[arice]

I watched it shortly after it came out. It did what it was supposed to and was a pretty good movie for its time... but it also kind of reinforced my decision to continue keeping my transness a secret (and I had been toying with the idea of opening up about it).

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[Charles96]

I watched after a cousin of mine insisted I shouldn't be trans because of what happened to Brandon. It made me curious to put it lightly, I had read about the case some before watching it though, so I knew what I was getting into. I was also pre T, it actually slightly scared me, but not enough to consider changing my mind.

A cis female actor did not bother me, he was pre everything, he like I do now still (first month on t) could pass as female. A trans man actor (which were rare at the time, and most were likely not out) wouldn't have been able to play someone pre t.

[2fish]

I saw the movie years ago and because movies and tv in general will always have negative stereotypes in them I knew better and took it with a grain of salt. I saw the iMovie when I was a kid. I thought it would be the same experience but my transition was the complete opposite of the movie. My transition was fast. I was on t within 3 months of therapy. I was post top surgery at 9 months on t. Also, I passed as a guy since I was 14. I'm 27 now. So, to be fair I should watch the movies again now that I'm post transition. Also I'm a year and a half on t and 9 months post op

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[Jacqueline]

I watched after a cousin of mine insisted I shouldn't be trans because of what happened to Brandon. It made me curious to put it lightly, I had read about the case some before watching it though, so I knew what I was getting into. I was also pre T, it actually slightly scared me, but not enough to consider changing my mind.

A cis female actor did not bother me, he was pre everything, he like I do now still (first month on t) could pass as female. A trans man actor (which were rare at the time, and most were likely not out) wouldn't have been able to play someone pre t.

Charles,

Sorry to interrupt this thread. Just need to welcome Charles and share some links. They are mostly just welcome information and rules of the site:

Things that you should read

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Once again, welcome to Susans. Hope you find what you are looking for.

Now, back to your thread.

With warmth,

Joanna

[Obfuskatie]

My main complaint is that Hollywood tends to only make movies about trans people when it's a tragedy. This movie is really hard to watch. The acting is very well done, but a lot of the movie was triggering for me. I don't know the trans male experience, but this isn't an affirming feel good movie for trans people in general. It's more of a cautionary tale made by cis people about how being trans is a death sentence, and I don't enjoy dehumanizing propaganda. Your friend should take the movie as a reason to be extra nice to you, whether or not some bigot decides to attack you, you can't live your life in fear.

     Hugs,
- Katie
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[noahjames]

I watched this for the first time with the only person I was out to, before my family knew or I started medically transitioning.  It put the fear of God into me.  I always go back and forth on how I feel about a cis female playing Brandon.  It didn't at all "change my mind" about transitioning, but I think it definitely played a role in the fear I carry around from day to day.  I make a lot of jokes about my "low life expectancy" to cover up how much that movie scared me, hah.