I need your help!!

[Rin-likes-rain]

I recently got into a fight with my mother over my gender. She kept bringing up sexuality and sin when sexuality has nothing to do with my gender. And It doesn't even matter if I have a female body and am attracted to females because I am in a relationship with a boy! (I'm genderfluid)

But we're fighting, and I'm telling her how scared I was for my step-dad to find out because anytime anything LGBT is on the news, especially transgender issues, so much hate spills out of his mouth. And then she told me something. They both knew. They have known for years, ever since I was a little kid just starting to realize these things myself. They knew, and instead of helping me, they decided to would be better to ignore it and shame me for showing the slightest interest in something masculine. Instead of helping me, they decided to make me dysphoric and suicidal because I was forced to have long hair (I wasn't even allowed to have bangs or layers), wear girly clothes, and was threatened with pink and dresses on a near daily basis. Instead of showing me love and compassion, they openly hated on me indirectly. They insulted people like me to my face, they called people like me disgusting, sinful, fake, mistakes, confused, TO MY FACE!!! And I let it go, because I thought, they don't understand how they make me feel. BUT THEYDID!!! THEY HAVE KNOWN THE WHOLE TIME!!!!

So now I'm going to officially come out to everybody (who are mostly anti-lgbt Christians) and be and look as qu**r as possible. I asked in the chat if it was okay to ask. But if anyone has any rainbow/trans/nonbinary/genderfluid colored or themed things like shirts, bracelets, necklaces, etc that they wouldn't mind giving me, I'd really appreciate it.

[arice]

I can't really imagine how betrayed you feel. I don't really know you well or them at all but the words I have for them aren't allowed on here.
I wish I could help with a shirt or something but I don't have anything. Good luck with your confrontation! I hope you make them squirm.

Sent from my SM-G870W using Tapatalk

[Rin-likes-rain]

Good luck with your confrontation! I hope you make them squirm.

That's my goal!

[Dena]

What your parents did was wrong but before you do something to hurt them, there is something you should consider. Dr John Money had the idea of how you raise a child determines their gender identity. This was a common idea for a while and if your parents got the idea from him, it may not be all their fault. Dr Money has hurt others as well. David Reimer was the most published case but through the site I know two others who were exposed to the same treatment directly or indirectly as the result of Dr Money's teachings.

I know you are hurting now but consider that lowering yourself to their level through vengeance may be something you come to regret in the future.

[Rachel]

Perhaps seeking a gender therapist should be priority one. Discuss with the therapist what has happened and where you want to go. Your family may not support you now, out of ignorance, and may come around later. I know you are hurting from what they did and it is best to plan your next steps rather than seek revenge.

[suzifrommd]

Alex, please let us know how it goes. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[Rin-likes-rain]

Actually it's Rin. I can't change my username. Yeah, I know. but learning that they knew makes me so sick of hiding. And I am angry. I am hurt. And I don't want to let them make me feel ashamed anymore. I'm done being scared to be myself. And I'm still scared. I'm scared about how people will react. I'm scared that my parents will end up hating me. I'm scared that they lied when they said they'd still love me if I chose to be transgender. But I don't want to be scared anymore. I don't want to duck and dodge like I'm still a 14-year-old kid secretly binding in my room. This, to me, isn't about vengeance. It's about making a statement. It's about flaunting who I am instead of hiding it. It's about showing them that what they did isn't okay and that it didn't work. I want them to see how much their trying to make me straight and cis did the complete opposite. And it's bout my little brother who feels ashamed to like anything girly because they think that shaming their child for being themselves is the right thing to do. They need to see that their methods did the complete opposite and that they just need to love us as we are.

[Rin-likes-rain]

My older brother is VERY bisexual, but he's so ashamed to be, that he's convinced himself that he's straight. For people who hate the LGBT so much, they sure do have a bad habit of breeding qu**rs.