Psyching Myself Out Before Injections

[Guile]

So, I'm not sure what it is, but lately I've been getting psyched out every time I go to do my testosterone injections. I've been on T for two months now, but only recently have I had problems with this. The first several times went flawlessly. Just jabbed myself, hardly felt anything, and got it done. Now, though... I don't know what it is, but every time I go to jab myself, my hand instinctively pulls back just before I hit the skin. I then sit there for a good five to ten minutes with Shia Labeouf screaming "just do it!!" in my head, but I can't seem to bring myself to do it quick anymore. I eventually end up doing it slowly, which I know hurts way more, and it does. Has anyone else experienced this sudden shyness with needles? If so, do you know of any good ways to get back into the "just do it" mentality that I used to have? I'd honestly ask my mother to help out, but she's deathly afraid of needles herself and already said she couldn't bear to jab me.

[Laura_7]

Here are a few resources that could help:

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,209217.msg1854205.html#msg1854205


I'd say try to relax ...
listen to some relaxing music ...


hugs

[FTMax]

I actually went through a phase of that around my 9 month mark. I had a lot of injection anxiety when I switched from gel to injections, and I would budget for about an hour to get it done. It slowly decreased down to just 5 minutes for the whole process.

And then around the 9 month mark, I don't know what it was, it just started to take longer. The first jump was 5 minutes to 30 minutes. Then an hour. Then 4 hours. Then until the next day. It was ridiculous. I would literally sit in my room, holding the syringe the entire time. I'd bring it up, get it close to my leg, and put it right back down.

I considered getting my roommate to do my shot, as I had him learn how when I switched to injections. But he has really shakey hands, so it seemed like it would be an even worse idea. What I ended up doing was setting time limits. I started with movies - I could watch a 2 hour movie, and sometime in that window I had to do my shot. Then bumped it down to TV shows - I can watch a 45-minute episode, and sometime in that window I had to do my shot. Then shorter TV shows, then YouTube videos, then listening to songs.

Some kind of treat afterwards is a good idea too. Ice cream, food you like, a haircut. Something to incentivize getting it over with!

And it's funny, my YouTube video of choice when I was having shot troubles was always the Shia Labeouf video 😀

[AGhostInMyArms]

I have experienced something similar myself, and I wish I could be more help but it's like a seesaw for me - injections went easily the first few weeks I did them, then I would experience intense anxiety even thinking about doing the shot.
Almost 6 years later, I'm only slightly ashamed to say I really can't do them often anymore. Being right-handed I always found the right side easiest, so when I do my shots that's usually the side I choose. Otherwise, I ask my sibling to do them each week which is no problem. I really don't like the feeling of not being in control about it, but I figure I have so little control over many circumstances as it is.

Honestly, I hope someday there's a sort of epi-pen procedure available. Just load up, press a button and the needle sticks itself. Good luck to you though man, I hope it gets easier for you again.

[noahjames]

I'm over a year on T and this still happens to me a lot.  I used to inject super easily, and then once I did something stupid and messed up a shot, I started getting nervous.  Eventually it's just a deep breath/remember how worth it injecting is/stabbing it like a dart kind of deal.

[Charles96]

Yes I get this for a few weeks I could do it myself, but then nope last week I couldn't my roommate ended up giving me it. Lucky I live with another trans man, but when he will be on vacation partly due to me being legally blind, and partly the fear of a repeat of last week I am going to a shot clinic.


Could that be a option for you maybe? Having someone else do it for a few times might make it easier.