If you're with friends or ur partner, they act as a buffer in some ways. When I'm with my BF, I pay attention to him ignoring any stares I may or may not get. He's also pretty vigilant about sticking up for me and calming me down the few times I've gotten upset by jerks saying transphobic garbage.
My mom, brother and friends usually also work well as a buffer. I live an 8hr drive from a lot of my HS and Undergrad friends, and sometimes they do need to adjust, because of how I look and how comfortable/used to being perceived as female I have gotten.
When you're by yourself, people in general are going to be more obvious about looking at you. It's more noticeable both because you aren't distracted by being with someone, and people don't want to be caught staring at someone by the person who is with them. There are also all sorts of judgements people have for women who are by themselves in public. It's less of a deal in bigger cities, and it's really easy to ignore and put off a don't bother me vibe if you're wearing headphones, regardless of whether you're listening to anything with them.
If someone keeps staring and it makes you uncomfortable, stare back, raise a quizzical eyebrow, and if they don't look away or say something roll your eyes and break your gaze. This will probably embarrass them and discourage them from staring or being rude. I've never tried this, but you could make a funny face at them, laugh and proceed to ignore them.
Hugs,
- Katie
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