Im finally feeling content and happy and not worried about "what may happen"
my body is taking to HRT very well and Its been a breath of fresh air. Some days Im so happy
I cant contain myself. I feel so different than I have my entire life, sorta like being reborn.
Im not so afraid of the world like I was only several weeks ago. Im pushing the boundaries even
more on presentation, but Im still not "presenting" female... or at least I dont think i am. Im surely
in the heavy andro stage and I feel just a clothing tweak will start the mams coming. Im gathering
some great crossover pieces for the day as I know its coming. Thing is, Im not worrying about it...when
its right, its right and I will just do what feels right.
My face is changing more each day... seems like I see just a lil more everyday, slight but forward progress.
Mouth, lips, dimples, cheeks all have tweaked and have been noticed by others who have been brave enough
to say so. Bodywise... my hips have started getting rounder as well as my lower abdomen, while my under boobs have slimmed, many clothes show a bit of hourglass now that wasnt there 2 months ago... Ive found so far Im lucky
and have been able to lose weight. I do work hard at it, well... half hard anyways, but I think my sheer happiness
is doing alot for me. Boobage.... well, I think they have changed shape and are coming in, but its hard to know
if its losing weight saggy moobs or what. Funny thing is at the moment I think I was cuter pre-hrt... and found it easier to get cute pics... maybe now Im just more critical of myself I dont know... Ive been staying clear of the camera as its not making me happy at the moment....
Sexually, Ive not lost it...nor do I want to...erections are nearly gone forever...and I feel the woman parts of my intersexuality are beginning to blossom
Body hair is much slower... Its been almost 2 weeks since I shaved my back and I used to have a sweater back there and I didnt need to touch it today. Arms, hands, feet, butt have all slowed to a crawl... chest is slower than it was... but Im anxious to see what happens. Legs are a 3-4 day deal and they need a normal shave. Facial hair... its a struggle, but slower for sure. Yesterday we lost power and I had to go unshaven and although it was there, it didnt make me feel bad at all. I noticed a couple days ago that my upper eyelashes are hitting my glasses now... it was a weird feeling until I realized what it was. Head hair, it really is better... I have a ways to go before I will state that its coming back... but it is absolutely better than it was. Im excited to see what time will do. Im about 2 weeks from my first follow up appt and wondering if doses will be upped. I swore I wouldnt step up, but now Im sorta excited
I just feel so different and so "right" thats the best way I can explain it... I feel right and Im less nerved about who knows or what they can see me doing... Im not jumping out in the world yet but I know its only going to get better and the day will come when I just do it. Im not rushing myself anymore. Therapy is helping me as well.
We are all different but dont let anyone tell you "that wont happen" just cuz it doesnt happen for some, doesnt mean it wont happen for you... just believe and keep swimming....
