Did you care about your looks before stealth?

[Robin Ellis Harriet]

As a female - forced to express yourself as a male - what can you do? Do you care what clothes you put on or how others perceive you - because in the end you'd never be able to properly portray yourself anyway.

Personally, right now, I really don't care anymore. I don't think I ever did. I don't care for wearing any fashionable snappy male clothing, attractive blue jeans or whatever guys wear. I generally put on a T-shirt and maybe even sweat pants and I'm done. Thats it. I don't care if my clothes are wrinkly and I look awful - trying to express myself using men's clothing is a lot like a bad hair day that has lasted 18 years. I simply can't do anything with this - not how I express myself anyway.

I plan on going stealth in a year or so from now. I know I'm personally going to put extra effort in portraying and expressing myself as a woman. I relate it to breathing. When you breath normally you take normal breaths - but if you hold in your breath for a while suddenly you gasp for it.

[Kat]

I did sort of. Since elementary school on I would try different clothing styles to see what my guy friends liked best. then basically stuck with that until those same friends started to hassle me about it. repeat ad nauseum until i finished high school

[Christine Eryn]

I try to appear as rough as possible, never really cared for fashion at all, except for a few trends here and there. Really I do like matching, expensive things, etc, but that will come in due time. Sadly I still try to put on some kind of act to appease people around me, honestly till FFS makes me a new person. 

[Lori]

I have not bought any new clothes in probably 5 years. I wear the same drab thing day after day. I just dont care, I really I dont. I dont care what people think, I dont care what they say, I dont care about how I look, nor do I care about male clothes. They are stupid looking and drab so why spend money on something I dont care about? I'm saving that money for a new fashionable wardrobe that I do care about. Victoria Secrets anybody?

[seldom]

Stealth?  Or do you mean going full time.  Before going full time...yeah I kind of did care.
After going full time...care even more. 

[Kate]

I cared about not looking foolish. A lot of male clothes, especially dress shirts, just looked stupid on me. So I'd try and find loose-fitting tops to sorta hide my body shape and make me look more male, of all things. Not that I looked *female* mind you, but I hated the idea of looking like an effeminate male - it terrified me that people would "figure me out."

So I liked things that FIT, but no... I didn't run out and buy the latest fashion or designer clothes or whatever.

~Kate~

[Shana A]

I despise guy clothes, anytime I've had to dress up for a wedding or something, I look frumpy and worse than if I had gone casual. For daily life I usually just wear jeans and loose fitting shirts... I don't even own a jacket anymore, there might be a tie in a drawer somewhere, I hate those things...

Z

[Lisbeth]

I will probably never go stealth.  It's hard to be an activist and stealth at the same time.  Unless you want to pretend you're an ally.

[Dennis]

I didn't care what I put on my body before. My work wardrobe consisted of three pairs of black pants, five shirts, identical except for colour, two blazers, and one pair of black shoes.

Now, I have more ties than a tie shop, four suits, black shoes and brown shoes, tons of shirts, and my casual wardrobe is pretty extensive as well. Mind-body congruence really makes dressing much more pleasant.

Dennis

[LostInTime]

Jeans and T-Shirt for school, home, and whatever jobs allowed it. Suits for the places I had to have one.

I did go through one last effort to really do the guy thing and look good while doing it. I had a suit tailored to my frame, which was nice. I got a kick butt short hair style that everyone liked and lost a few pounds. it was short lived though as I had to finally face the real me. I still have that suit hanging in the closet and one day I will find someone who I think is special enough to have it.

Now it is slacks and a nice top at work although I occasionally wear a skirt. leather, corsets, skirts, and dresses for the fun times.

[Berliegh]

Did you care about your looks before stealth?

To answer the question......I did far too much as a MALE and spent 2 hours on my hair.....I was classed as a vain by the people around me...

[kalt]

No matter what I might look like, I love seeing what can accentuate whatever I am to the best.  It's an art, fashion is.  It's not in the sense of just looking good, it's a path to discovery.  It's not all about self expression, it's about showing yourself that your life is still together and that even if things aren't working out ideally, you're still on top.

Granted, there are those days when you just don't care.  I used to be pretty fashion conscious.  Lately I've just been putting on a marathon shirt, some sports shorts and whatever.  I haven't bought a new pair of shoes for 2 years, aside from running shoes.  My good ole chucks are amazing pals!

Also, just because you want to be a girl, doesn't mean you have the natural female fashion sense many of them do.  I mean seriously, I remember going to a gay church and a MtF there was next to hopeless.  Dark, dull gray and neon green, red nails, and no matter what she did with her makeup she couldn't get it right.  It was okay though, she makes people smile^_^

[monica]

Anymore I don't care at all. I never buy my own clothes anymore, they're either given to me as a gift..Which I'm usually disapointed about because I'd much rather have a nice skirt or something. And if that's not the case, then my clothes are back from like 9th grade. Usually I wake up, grab a pair of hopefully clean pants, any tshirt, and walk out the door.

Now as Monica on the other hand...It takes me hours to get ready. First there's all the shaving *yuck* but it has to be done..Followed by my hair that usually takes forever, and if I'm in the mood the makeup. That also takes atleast a half hour. Then there's the horrible decision of picking out my clothes. I normally go through atleast 3 or 4 outfits before finding the one that "suits me that day" =] Then shoes...So many shoes I never know what I wanna wear!!

Two hours later, Monica's ready to go =]


Now if I only had SOMEWHERE to go......hehe

[Rachael]

before stealth? ofcourse, ive cared since ive presented female... i dont like to be seen as trans at all...
R

[Omika]

Nothing quite like going from a scruffy, passive, suicidal wreck of a man to a devastingly gorgeous, confident, richly dressed woman.  To say that I feel great about life would be the understatement of the century.  The magic was in me all along.

Thank you real-life fairy tale!

Blair's fortune cookie wisdom for today:

"The greatest power in the world today is the power to change."

I love Chinese food.

~ BB

[Berliegh]

Nothing quite like going from a scruffy, passive, suicidal wreck of a man to a devastingly gorgeous, confident, richly dressed woman.  To say that I feel great about life would be the understatement of the century.  The magic was in me all along.

Thank you real-life fairy tale!

Blair's fortune cookie wisdom for today:

"The greatest power in the world today is the power to change."

I love Chinese food.

~ BB

Yes...but some of us live in the real world and strive for money and stability. There is no fairy tale transition.....

[Omika]

Perspective is everything.

~ BB

[Berliegh]

Perspective is everything.

~ BB

My point exactely...

[Rachael]

perspective got evicted for not paying their rent...
R

[Omika]

I've been paying rent for five years.  I'm quite alone, financially.  I would argue that I do very much live in the real world, complete with loss, starvation, worry, stress, anxiety and adversity. I don't understand this conversation!

Not everyone chooses to be miserable, you know.

~ BB