Stages of transitioning

[HappyMoni]

Hi, I am Moni! I have wanted to appeal to the collective wisdom of the people on this site, especially from those who have been full time for a while. I was part time and now I am newly full time. On a personal basis, I am trying to see what to expect as time passes. How will my attitude possibly change as I am full time longer and longer. Maybe it might help others to see what they might expect as well. So, my topic is, can you identify any progression of thought (stages) of transitioning that might be common to transitioning people in general. I would start with what I know. (Of course, there as many variations of experience as people, but am looking for generalities.)

1) Realization of being trans and committing to transistioning. (#2 and #3 could come before this)
2) First trips out into public. Highly self conscious that everyone is looking at you. Maybe only a partial presentation.
3) More complete presentation, more willing to be interacting with people in public. Still pretty shy.
4) Commitment to full time. Probably happy with a bit of worry of what the future brings.
5) A bit of a tentative time where you are facing situations that you have never dealt with as your true gender before. There may be a mental struggle as to whether to avoid versus jumping in and tackling a new situation. Still a fair amount of worry about how you pass.
6)  Next my guess is a fairly long period of experiencing things in a new way. I expect it is a mix of conquering new situations (and thus gaining confidence) and getting knocked on one's butt (with the result of shaken confidence.)
7) The more you experience, the more I expect that what other people think becomes less important. Maybe comfort level increases or you just get hardened to people clocking you or being negative.
  After years of living full time, do you find that you move on, with transitioning not a daily thought process any longer?

   I invite your thoughts either with a list of your own or a comment on one of my numbers above. Hope you don't think this is silly. I didn't see any posts addressing it.
Moni

[EmilyMK03]

Moni, I'm also newly full time (about 2 months).  I think the biggest confidence booster to me was getting my name legally changed (a few weeks ago).  It's had a much bigger impact on my self-confidence than I expected.  Even if I'm not asked to produce any identification, just knowing in my mind that I am now legally accepted as a female helps give me the courage to face most situations.

[V]

Aha! This is something I know about. I transitioned 15 years ago, and I had my SRS 13 years ago.

I find that as time passes, I am more comfortable in my own skin, and I 'try' to pass less. What I mean is that I have become much more like most of my cis-female peers. I dress more like women of my age do now, I use much less makeup than I used to as well.
I never 'forget' that I am trans however, and I still worry about some things like my hair not being feminine enough, or my visible Adam's Apple. I still have to really work on my voice, because it still is not very good.
But on the whole, the things that cis-females have to put up with, or work on, like shaving your legs, or making sure your appearance is smart for work, or suffering sexism, all the things that might have once been new and hence exciting or interesting or challenging, are now run-of-the-mill, or a pain.
"Normal life" takes over, with all it's trials and tribulations, and transitioning and being trans kinda takes a back seat.
Partly that is good and to be expected, but I do sometimes miss the sense of wonder and discovery that I had when taking my first tentative steps out in the world as a woman. It really is an amazing experience, and not much else compares to it really.
I remember saying to my old boss: "I've had so much fun, I really ought to change sex more often!"
I still want to get married, and have a nice secure cosy relationship with my fella. I hope that will happen one day.

For myself, I get bored very easily, so I deliberately spice things up a bit every now and then. And every 7 years or so, I find I really have to make some changes to myself in order to feel alive and not stuck in a rut.
Just now is one of those times, and in the past few months I have revamped my writing and the way I walk, to be more feminine.
I applied for a new job today, just to challenge myself, even if I might still keep my current job.
I'm looking at some minor FFS, Adam's Apple removal, hairline improvement, brow ridge reduction.
Just stuff to change and work on.
I can't just stand still, but that's just me.

In short, yes you do move on, and life continues. You just now deal with it as the gender you actually are, both outside and inside.

[HappyMoni]

Thanks Emily! Yes, I see this as part of the commitment to full time. I have had a big holdup on getting everything done after the name change decree, and its driving me crazy. It's reaffirming to see it as legal and official.

  I think the biggest confidence booster to me was getting my name legally changed (a few weeks ago).  It's had a much bigger impact on my self-confidence than I expected.

Thank you also "V." I'll save the long quote here, but you made me think about something I hadn't thought of before. Doing things for a long time makes them normal and routine, but it never occurred to me that one could miss the excitement of doing things for the first time. I went to the ladies room with a female relative the other day. It was so nice because I had never done that, and they were totally cool with it. I was so excited about such a simple thing. Soon it will not even be something to think about.
As far as being trans taking a back seat (eventually) to the rest of life, I think that would be great to be able to relax about it so much. It is such a big part of our lives for so long, I wonder if that bothers some people. Maybe you go through withdrawal.
Thanks for the new perspective.
Moni