Can a TG have ever loved their body?

[Tristyn]

I think some trans people actually do like or appreciate their bodies, which is cool I think. But I don't think I ever liked mine much. I'm sure I will once I am completely transitioned over to a male. Honestly, I wish I didn't have to modify my body just to feel like a human.

[Midnightstar]

I'm not on hormones yet but basically my body is something i sometimes don't mind and sometimes i do it often depends on how my feelings shift, but somethings stay the same. I don't have a huge hate or like for my body though.

[popa910]

I've liked my body's conditioning on rare occasion.

Besides that, I never did like it.

This is pretty near to what I have felt.*  In high school, playing soccer, hockey, and baseball kept me in fantastic condition, and I was thoroughly happy with how fit and strong I was.  It was wonderful being in excellent shape.  However, I've never really found myself attractive (probably largely because I have a very average face), and that's part of the reason I worked so hard to be in such excellent shape.

Lately, I've found that I've become envious of women I see.  If I see a woman I find attractive (I am confident that I am attracted to women), there's a part of me that looks at her with attraction, and another part that looks at her with longing to have a body like that.  But I have yet to determine how much of this is some odd sexual desire and how much is me just wanting to have a feminine body.  I've begun to think that it may be both, but I'm still piecing things together.  I've also often seen a woman wearing something I thought was pretty, and wished I could go out in public wearing things like that.  Since I don't like drawing attention to myself, going out looking like a man wearing a dress is not an option I am willing to consider, so I often wish I had a female body for that reason.

Likewise, I've recently become more ambivalent about my body.  I still try, somewhat half-heartedly, to keep it in decent shape.  But my daily life is currently focusing on academic pursuits and my post-college job search.

*I don't currently identify as transgender; I'm still figuring myself out.  I'm an AMAB, and I've more or less settled that I am at least non-binary.