How to Become Trans

[Michelle_P]

I dunno.  When I saw the thread title, the first thing that popped into my mind was this bit of dialogue from 'Stripes':

Recruiter: Now, are either of you homosexuals?
John Winger: [John and Russell look at each other] You mean, like, flaming, or...
Recruiter: Well, it's a standard question we have to ask.
Russell Ziskey: No, we're not homosexual, but we are *willing to learn*.
John Winger: Yeah, would they send us someplace special?
Recruiter: I guess that's "no" on both. Now if you could just give Uncle Sam your autograph...

So, I am willing to learn.  Would they send me someplace special?

But seriously... This sounds more like a way to become a stereotypical "dude in a dress."  I'm sorry, Jane Emily, but this just doesn't ring true. I don't mean to be harsh, but not all of us want to express ourselves according to one template.

First, I didn't become transgender.  I am a transgender person, was likely born that way, and the big discovery was in admitting it to myself.  Becoming Trans was very likely an accident of birth for me, something in prenatal development.

Second, the three items you list sound more like an idea of "how to behave as a transgender person."  I behave as me, who happens to be a transgender person.  I study how folks I admire live and behave in an effort to emulate them.  Frilly, flouncy clothes don't work so well when I'm under the Miata getting ready for a track day, cleaning around the house, or even going shopping.  They don't work that well, and they can draw unwelcome attention leading to getting clocked.  I'm more of a jeans and pullover person.  When meeting a client or going on a business appointment I'll wear black pants or midi skirt, a nice Oxford blouse, and dark blazer (and more conservative hair).

I think I can be feminine in my appearance, speech, and behavior without being stereotypical.

A bra?  Yeah.  Avoids chafing and irritation, and can be more comfortable.  I definitely need a sports bra now when working out. (Ouch!  Figured that out last week...    ). But go to a shop and get fitted properly, for goodness sakes!  The wrong size can be as painfully bad as no bra.  (Learned that the hard way, too.  Too big a band, poor support by depending on straps, wrong cup shape... After a day that's downright uncomfortable!)

There are many ways to be a transgender person.  They're all right as long we we are true to ourselves.

[RobynD]

I love educating people, primarily because i like people and i learn just as much or more in the process than they do. Material to help people with this journey is out there in a variety of forms including the info on this site. I think more info out there is always a good idea.

I'd avoid any sort of clothes or beauty advice as part of that process though, because as many have said we are all so different. I don't know where exactly i fall on the girlie/feminine spectrum of things, but i wear a dress once a week, most of the time it's jeans. I'm rarely out of t-shirts in the summer including in the office. Yeah i wear bras and cute underwear  and put on some light makeup daily, but i don't feel like i'm near as feminine as many women i see.

The neat thing about fashion and beauty is that you can make it uniquely yours, from mainstream feminine, to goth, to tomboy or anything in between.

[Drexy/Drex]

I love educating people, primarily because i like people and i learn just as much or more in the process than they do. Material to help people with this journey is out there in a variety of forms including the info on this site. I think more info out there is always a good idea.

I'd avoid any sort of clothes or beauty advice as part of that process though, because as many have said we are all so different. I don't know where exactly i fall on the girlie/feminine spectrum of things, but i wear a dress once a week, most of the time it's jeans. I'm rarely out of t-shirts in the summer including in the office. Yeah i wear bras and cute underwear  and put on some light makeup daily, but i don't feel like i'm near as feminine as many women i see.

The neat thing about fashion and beauty is that you can make it uniquely yours, from mainstream feminine, to goth, to tomboy or anything in between.

Yes goth thats me gawd I just cant wait to wear makeup nail polish