boyhood? i wish i could be me?

[Tristan]

Every time i remember something about my trans signs or life i feel sad
because i just do. I don't know why i just dont want to listen its probably me but i missed my childhood
and teenager years.  i can be the man but never can i be my self i feel like i missed out on a lot.

[Veronica J]

Every time i remember something about my trans signs or life i feel sad
becase i just do. I don't know why i just dont want to listen its probably me but i miseed my childhood
and teenager years.  i can be the man but never can i be my self i feel liek i missed out on a lot.

i feel the same from the opposite end.. but i understand, most if not all do.

there are things you missed out, but some you didnt. all the experiances in your life has given you the courage and strength to be you.

[Elis]

I kind of feel I missed out too but I think growing up as a guy would have been slightly harder than growing up a girl. As a female you're more allowed to play around with gender expression; whereas as a male you're forced to be masculine and like 'masculine' hobbies. And teenage guys are sort of immature. So I feel kinda lucky I didn't have to go through that.

And I agree with what Veronica said.

[Xirafel]

I kind of feel I missed out too but I think growing up as a guy would have been slightly harder than growing up a girl. As a female you're more allowed to play around with gender expression; whereas as a male you're forced to be masculine and like 'masculine' hobbies. And teenage guys are sort of immature. So I feel kinda lucky I didn't have to go through that.

And girls have to grow up with inconveniences like menstruation and lower physical strength. Granted, I have little to no physical strength, but that's mainly since I'm not interested in working out. It's just boring to me.
It really depends on whether you're into those things. I was never into the crude jokes which they threw around, and admittedly many of them completely went over my head.

What I feel is that you could delete two entire decades of my life and it wouldn't really make any difference.
I have a more developed mind and a vast amount of knowledge, but what was really the point of those two decades?
With how insignificant it was, I could hit my head today, gain amnesia regarding anything beyond a year ago and it wouldn't really make much of a difference.

The first eight years I can't remember anyway. Nine was a nice one. Beyond that, it was mainly extreme depression or hiding from reality in a little room + going out whenever it was absolutely necessary.
That's about ten years of my already pitifully short lifespan wasted on nothing. How many decades do I have left? Three? After that point, I'll already be going senile.

[Kylo]

I feel sad about it too but thinking about it, even if I'd been born bio male I'd still have had to grow up in a poor household with drunk/unstable parents and picked on or ostracized at school, I think I'd have handled it in exactly the same way, and there still would have been no escaping it until 18. Would it have been happier or all that much "better" if I'd been male? I doubt it, actually. It'd still have been an unpleasant childhood.

[becky.rw]

There's a lot of role exposure that only occurs in that 8-15 range.

One of my greatest disappointments was my grandmother refusing to teach me how to sew in a serious, clothes making way.   It was just a road to far that she wouldn't cross.   She bought me a few needlepoint toys, but wouldn't go further.    Worse, she had a great setup, that I wish I could have inherited, but was sold or donated, and no one even considered that I might I have wanted it.

I did get dragged to hunting camps and fishing trips that had lots of masculine bonding where I had zero ability to bond or or understand anything.   They eventually stopped dragging me along, but I never got the sewing lessons or mentoring.

[Veronica J]

And girls have to grow up with inconveniences like menstruation and lower physical strength. Granted, I have little to no physical strength, but that's mainly since I'm not interested in working out. It's just boring to me.
It really depends on whether you're into those things. I was never into the crude jokes which they threw around, and admittedly many of them completely went over my head.

What I feel is that you could delete two entire decades of my life and it wouldn't really make any difference.
I have a more developed mind and a vast amount of knowledge, but what was really the point of those two decades?
With how insignificant it was, I could hit my head today, gain amnesia regarding anything beyond a year ago and it wouldn't really make much of a difference.

The first eight years I can't remember anyway. Nine was a nice one. Beyond that, it was mainly extreme depression or hiding from reality in a little room + going out whenever it was absolutely necessary.
That's about ten years of my already pitifully short lifespan wasted on nothing. How many decades do I have left? Three? After that point, I'll already be going senile.

well i see your point, those first 2 decades gave you something very important. it gave you strength to face the future, it made a very strong person. it made you you, without those years you would be less far less. each experience in life adds to the better you. wipe those years away with amnesia and there go your dreams, your strength and the wonderfull person you are.

my experiences has given me the strength to face my future without family if thats what happens.. to stand strong against anything brought against me and to be me. to have the courage to change and be content, happy and be myself..without those years in my past i wouldn't be able to be me. with out those years teaching me to be strong i wouldn't be alive today.