Best age to transition and pass easily

[Britt116]

I'm 16 and I'm genderqueer but I just was wondering what the best age to transition at to pass

[Dena]

The sooner you are on a blocker, the fewer issues you would have to deal with in the transition. As for changing your gender role, that can happen at any age. Children as young as 3 or 4 are living in their desired role and we have site members in the 60s and 70s who are just starting down the road to their desired gender. I started HRT at 25 and had my surgery at 30 after living as a woman for 3 years. Everybody is different and it's a question of what you want and how you see your life planned out.

[PrincessCrystal]

Yeah, honestly, I'm seriously regretting not figuring out a way to get hormone blockers of some sort in my system much sooner: I've been growing about half an inch a year for the past 5 years.  Now that I'm 25, I probably won't grow anymore, but I'm distressed by every single inch of height I have now that I'm aware of these issues...

I'd say, if you want to pass as your non-assigned gender when you get older and look good doing it, you want to get HRT ASAP.

[Vervain]

Generally, it is considered that the earlier you can start (either by puberty blockers or hormones dependent on age), the better.

However, this is not always possible for a variety of reasons. The most important question I would ask is: Do you have a supportive family? If your family is supportive, then I would start talking to them about how seriously you feel about this.

Even if they are supportive, they may have concerns about starting HRT before you are a legal adult. If they do, I would see about whether they're willing to go with you to a gender identity therapist who can evaluate you and maybe help explain to your parents.

Puberty blockers are less "threatening" since they simply put off puberty and biological changes, and if you have a supportive family, they may be willing to go with this option. I suggest this because even if you have already started puberty, the "everyone knows" "knowledge" that puberty is between 13-18 is incorrect. Physical body changes continue through your 20s. It's generally thought to extend until, iirc, roughly 23 for those assigned female at birth, and up through 25-27 for those assigned male at birth.

I do also want to mention that AMAB folks can experience a "growth spurt" around age 25 that causes the body shape to become more masculine, with broader shoulders, etc. I've known quite a few AMAB folks (regardless of identification) who have talked about having extremely slender bodies, not terribly broad shoulders, etc, at age 20, and then around roughly 25, their body changed to become more masculine. This isn't to say it's guaranteed, because I do know plenty of AMAB folks who remained with a slender body, but I think that is in part genetic.

If you do NOT have a supportive family, then you are likely going to need to wait until you are independent. If you are in the US, you should remain on your family's insurance until age 26 (I believe they are required by law to cover you, but you may want to double-check that), and you will want to check out what they cover. Therapy is usually covered, and HRT is covered for a lot of folks I know, but surgeries often are not. But, once you are an adult and on your own, you would be able to take advantage of the insurance coverage to pursue transition regardless of your family.

Any other advice I would have to give really does depend on the answer regarding your family, and also life-plans. For instance, are you planning on going to college? If you are, you will likely want to check out how supportive they are of trans* folks. Even though a lot of colleges these days have LGBT clubs and resources, that doesn't mean they are trans friendly. There are lots that are just LGB (or even just LG, and to hell with the other letters) friendly and don't support trans folk at all.

Anyway. I look forward to hearing from you, and welcome from another newbie. *hugs and cookies of choice offered*

[Mariah]

There is no real perfect age to transition, but in the end the earlier you block the wrong hormone and can start the correct one the more CIS looking as far as bone structure and other related traits. After puberty ends then the bones and certain things that have occurred that either can't be changed or sometimes can be by corrective surgery. Hugs
Mariah

[tgchar21]

@Vervain - The 26 requirement in Obamacare is that insurance companies can't knock you off of your parent's plan (or disqualify your parents from putting you on it) until that age*, not that your parents must keep you on their plan until then (so if your parents aren't supportive staying on is not a guarantee).

*That change was made, among other reasons, so that young people wouldn't immediately lose their insurance as soon as they left school or aged out at a once-lower cutoff. It does not require parents to continue carrying their adult children on their insurance (possible Obamacare penalties if not covered elsewhere aside).

[Pisces228]

As soon as you can, as young as you safely can.  I wanted to start at 22 but was scared of what my family would do.  I was not completely independent of them and could not transition safely at the time.  I settled for an androgynous identity and was like "ok, I can be OK with this."  Fast forward 5 years later at 27, I have chest hair for the first time, my facial hair has gotten much much heavier, and I stopped getting called ma'am when out and about.  I have finally started to transition but I started to have more male like changes before then.  So yes, the younger the better or else your body might take you by surprise too and start to change.