Parents harassed me at work today

[WolfNightV4X1]

Its not like I dont contact them and Im a nice person so I dont just tell them to f- off, but I regularly get angry responses from my parents saying that I dont talk to them...which is well, surprise surprise because they can be jerks sometimes.

...Keep in mind they live in Texas and I live in Oklahoma, so they crossed state lines to visit me without my permission.


So...They come to my workplace today, my mom is crying and insists I talk to her. My manager being a nice lady says I should go talk to them outside. Relenting, because its my manager, I go outside to talk to them. My mother then proceeds to insult my friend/partner calling her a 'thing', and I NOPED back in.

Since then they had been standing around in the store waiting for me to come out of employees only areas, asking my coworkers to send me out to speak to them (To which my response is "I dont want to talk to them and theyre harassing me at work")

...my coworkers have been supportive of the delicate situation. They said themselves they love me for who I am, gave me a hug, one of them called me a 'badass' ...somehow.



My manager went out to politely send them out of the store, which Im greatful for.



But dang this has been such a dramafest Im so glad that the people around me are so supportive somehow what the heck???

[Kylo]

So if I understand this right, your parents traveled out of State to insult you/your partner in person?

Wow. They have serious issues, it seems.

Is there a chance this could end up being a danger to you? I.e. they may follow you around, continue to harrass you at your work and home? If something like that continues and you're unable to resolve it peacefully... perhaps the law should become involved...

[WolfNightV4X1]

So if I understand this right, your parents traveled out of State to insult you/your partner in person?

Wow. They have serious issues, it seems.

Is there a chance this could end up being a danger to you? I.e. they may follow you around, continue to harrass you at your work and home? If something like that continues and you're unable to resolve it peacefully... perhaps the law should become involved...

...this is the norm, when I try to avoid situations because I dont want to get into altercations and debates about that aspect of my life they find ways to corner me and invade my privacy, be it at visiting at my own home or apparently at my own workplace (which...fyi, I did not tell them WHICH location, so they probably traveled to several nearby ones asking for me each time).

They initially wanted to just visit, which they tried asking me if they could beforehand, being nice instead of saying I wasnt interested I repeatedly said I was busy with work and they continually insisted on asking when Im off so they could come over, and I never gave them explicit permission to come see me (I wouldve in the future when I was ready). So surprise visiting my workplace its quite obvious Ive transitioned when my coworkers call me he and they see me with short hair, so the supposed visit turns more into a "we need to talk", which is essentially condemning my life as awful and yes insulting my partner, that, and my mom insisting I get help via estrogen treatments rather than T.


For reference, Im 21, I live with my partner. I pay rent. I have a job. Im planning on going to school. Im a nearly full-functioning adult and they insist on seeing me even after Ive already moved out to do so.



Honestly, Im really pissed off they invaded my privacy and personal space yet again so I think Im going to give my mother the 'this is the last straw' speech and cut things off until IM ready to speak to them. I wont get into legal territory unless they come to my home or workplace again, if my manager hadnt sent them off I wouldve called police tbh.

[stephaniec]

sorry you have to deal with unsupportive parents

[FTMax]

Whether or not you identify your parents the way that some of these folks do, there is a lot of great information and advice about going low/no contact with parents that don't respect boundaries at the raisedbynarcissists sub->-bleeped-<-. Your story sounds remarkably similar to a lot of stories on there, so it may be helpful to you.

[Hughie]

So sorry that this has happened and just a note to say I'm thinking of you. There's some good thoughts here on this thread so far. This is well beyond stepping over boundaries, and calling the police would be fine. I think it's reasonably to tell them that you do not wish for any contact from them and that you will contact them if and when you're ready. Good luck!

[WolfNightV4X1]

So sorry that this has happened and just a note to say I'm thinking of you. There's some good thoughts here on this thread so far. This is well beyond stepping over boundaries, and calling the police would be fine. I think it's reasonably to tell them that you do not wish for any contact from them and that you will contact them if and when you're ready. Good luck!

This is exactly what Ive done. Shouldnt be much of an issue anymore for the next couple months until I decide what to do long term with our relationship.

Thanks everyone again though, I think from here on out I can move along and handle things, I dont consider this issue will ever be gone but it will be nice for now.